Hoping that Greg Wallace is forgiven, rather than cancelled

[Toodaloo1567]

Just a few concerns about this whole GW thing. Caveat: I do not condone behaviour that is illegal.

1. It does kind of look like a whole bunch of privileged TV luvvies are clamouring to denounce someone with really quite humble roots. I grew up in London and am constantly paranoid about how I come across to my mainly middle class colleagues. The thing is, middle class and privileged people operate by a set of unwritten rules. It’s like a full time job in itself trying to emulate their way of interacting, lest you be called out for not being ‘nice’ enough or doing something odd to them, like forgetting to start an email with ‘Hope you are well?’. Only, they won’t let you know to your face that you’ve accidentally been too sharp or direct, or maybe that your joke wasn’t woke enough - no, that stuff just goes straight to HR.
2. The equality act 2010 makes it the employer’s responsibility to prevent sexual harassment in the workplace. Why wasn’t all this lewd stuff dealt with? GW said that no one had made a formal complaint. Again, it makes me wonder whether the middle class luvvies just didn’t want to call things out at the time because it’s ‘beneath’ them to even consider doing something about it.
3. Even though he’s apologised, the public doesn’t think that’s good enough. It’s like only perfect people get to keep their careers. Woe betide you if you said something crass on twitter 10 years ago, or got caught speeding or something.

Of course, lots of you would want to shout me down over this, but you know what? We’re all mums here and many of us have sons. Boys and young men do and say crass things. GW hasn’t raped or systematically abused anyone. It doesn’t make what’s happened right, but I also don’t think it’s right that swarms of pitch-fork waving strangers get to play judge, jury and executioner. I’m a big fan of forgiveness. Am I the only one?

I wonder how many junior women and girls have abandoned their career aspirations because of his behaviour. And the behaviour of people like him.

I’ll save my sympathies for them.

And the piece he put out slagging off the women who have complained about him is just the icing on the cake. And it re ignited the whole story again due to his arrogance and stupidity .

I could reply to you with all kind of insults and vulgar sexual innuendos.
And you'd have to forgive me, OP - 'cos I am of 'umble origins.
Meanwhile MNHQ would quite rightly delete my post.
See how this works?

It's irrelevant whether all the country forgives him or doesn't. It's not even relevant if the BBC or other broadcasters 'forgive' him. It's just a question of public standards and legal liability. Do you think anyone has an obligation to employ him?

They said tonight there are fresh allegations about him which sound worse than the other ones.

Why did no-one complain about his behaviour at the time?

I read about a woman making "an informal complaint " - never heard of her & can't remember her name. Why not make it formal? Might have spared a lot of other women.

To make it clear, I think he's vile, but staying silent is not helping anyone.

I keep seeing that tweet making Gregggggggg out to be the devil incarnate. I have a name that is always mis-spelled. Mostly because people are too lazy or incompetent to check properly. So if someone comes to me asking for something - favour, financial, whatever, but cant be bothered to get my name right, I am a lot less inclined to help out. Because its not the 1st, 2nd or 3rd time but more likely the 100 millionth. I check what I do.

So no that tweet does not make Gregggg vile. The accusations however do.

Just like him, or his apologists, using the fact that he is autistic. He's an arsehole of the first order who liked making other people uncomfortable.

Do we really have to explain this again?
Read the thread!

Again, there have been a LOT of complaints made. Gregggg himself was spoken to at least once. The question you need to be asking is why he remained employed given how many complaints were made.

And many of us have daughters and want them to be able to work without being sexually harassed!!!

How dare you attempt to excuse his behaviour!

Women should be free to work without having to deal with this crap!

We all have to live by rules of behaviour when at work and in public. He has flouted all those rules for years and profited very nicely. He is now, finally, being asked to answer for his behaviour. This is exactly as it should be in a civilised society. Forgiveness has fuck all to do with anything. It's not your place to forgive anyone, since you are neither one of the victims nor God, so I can't see the relevance of that tbh. It sounds like you are projecting your own experiences onto someone who is nothing like you. Have you ever groped someone? Gone to work naked? Made lewd comments at work? No? How would you feel if your boss had done all those things to you? Pretty sure you would find it deeply unpleasant and upsetting.

if it were all historic stuff that was done before he was already investigated before 2017, and stopped, i'd kind of agree, but that would have needed 7/8 years of documented evident changes in his behaviour.

The kind of shit he does with the 'banter' is exactly the crap i've had to listen to from my ExH and his mates that work in an all male, factory environment, and i know they've said stuff to the very rare female staff there.. and yes, they are all of 'an age'.. that being middle aged MEN of 50+ who grew up with this being acceptable who've never matured or grown past it, and refuse to see the damage.

Do i think he ought to be forgiven? Possibly with genuine remorse, cancelled? No.. i'm not about seeing someone's career ruined, however, if the BBC choose not to have him on their shows or radio again, he has only himself to blame.

My name is often mis-spelled too.
But you know what, I never pull people up on it because I’m not an arrogant twat.

Is this his PR people trying to take the temperature on how annoyed 'middle class women of a certain age' are with him?

I agree with you OP, the whole thing has been blown out of proportion.

No, absolutely cancelled and the start of a movement that means that my and everyone else's kids don't have to put up with this sort of shit in their workplaces ever again.

#cancelthemastertwat

Do you really not understand why a junior member of staff (eg a runner or an intern) might not want to make a full formal complaint about 'the talent'?

Men have used this kind of power imbalance to get away with shitty behaviour since the dawn of time, and yet so many people still appear to not understand those dynamics. It's...odd.

clamouring to denounce someone with really quite humble roots. I grew up in London and am constantly paranoid about how I come across to my mainly middle class colleagues. The thing is, middle class and privileged people operate by a set of unwritten rules.

Odd suggestion that working class people just simply can't understand what is and is not appropriate behaviour in the work place.

Op, I sincerely hope your post stems from a place of complete ignorance and you’ve neglected to do your research on what he’s actually said over the last 17 years.
Because if you are aware of all of the things he’s said, yet you’ve still posted this-then that raises serious questions about your moral judgment and how safe you are to be around.

Respectfully, I would request this is taken down if I were you. You are in for a flaming after this

I hope you don't have daughters op.

As a mother of a son I am hoping both DH and I have done our utmost to ensure our son doesn't think this sort of behaviour is okay

These are some examples of what he's alleged to have said and done. None of them could in any way be described as "borderline" or "cheeky".

"I came into the studio and was like, 'Hi Gregg, I've got something for you!' And he said, 'Oh, is it a present for my cock?'

"As she was bending over, Gregg in front of me went and put his hands over her buttocks and then turned to me and went, 'Cor', and then was laughing as if this was a great joke,"

"Within 1 hour of meeting Gregg Wallace he told me of a sex act that he and his partner at the time enjoyed 'every morning'.

“There was a British Sign Language interpreter there and he wandered over to her at one point and just said: ‘Do you have to sign everything I say?’ And she said: ‘Yes,’ and then he just started saying: ‘Big boobs’, ‘sexy bum’ – this sort of thing, in order to get her to sign it.

How many chances were you hoping he’d have? I suppose he needs one more than he’s already had, so we need to add up all of the times he’s allegedly continued to sexually harrass women across a number of years. Maybe we should just go for like, 101? Or maybe 1001? You choose!

In the spirit of second chances, do you fancy apologising to the working class men you’ve just insulted, and the middle class ‘luvvies’ you think should put up and shut up?

Edit to add - accidentally quoted the first post, sorry!

Sure, hardly a criminal but it does sound like he has done some horrible things (allegedly). I mean it’s not hard to just not sexually harass colleagues, and he should have known better, no excuses. However, the media storm is disproportionate. I can’t help but think that there’s worse out there, and more going on in the world! These luvvies especially Beeb types are always so so quick to turn on the heretic/wrong-thinker.

Fuck me this is the funniest thing I've read on here in ages - "we are all mums", "Boys and young men do and say crass things", and my favourite "GW hasn't raped anyone".

As a middle class woman of a certain age I am loving seeing that pompous misogynist taken to task.