Husbands ideas are annoying

[NarcoosseeLover]

My husband is full of ideas. Some better than others, but most are just fads.

Example - Make homemade yoghurt; pay for a ghost writer to write a book; eat more eggs; produce own aftershave etc etc

In isolation, the ideas are fine, but he goes all in at the first instance.

So I have a kitchen full of electrical gadgets and ingredients we’ll never use; a fridge full of multiple trays of eggs; a cupboard full of funnels, essential oils and alcohol etc.
I just about get through having a clear out and making space in the cupboards, only for him to have a bunch of ideas and fill them again.

It’s driving me up the wall. He’s in the kitchen making large quantities of yoghurt. I don’t want any. I’d rather pick up a pot from Aldi personally.

Is it just mine or does anyone else have one of these husbands? How do you manage?

Disclaimer, I have OCD and stress about organisation and things having their place, so it does make me feel quite cross.

@rookiemere my dad did wine!
Out of the 4 years, 3 were great, even grew his own.
That one year though.... That one was alcohol like more like spirit😂 deadly but delicious.
Friend of his tried palenka and his garage was no more. Rip

Your husband sounds quite cool imo

Hah, both me and DH are a bit like this.

The home made aftershave and the wine explosions reminded me of the lovely year we made home made bath salts for Xmas pressies, using loads of essential oils and fancy salts and costing way more than actual bath salts. Also, if you get the ratios wrong, it blows the doors off the bathroom cabinet 😂

Have just had a clear out for some building works and the house has been ringing with shouts of "babe, do you still need this sausage maker/broken cordless sander/ keto crockpot recipe book" etc

This made me laugh:) I hadn't thought of it like that.

Crikey, realising I might have ADHD!

My list of hobbies that I was obsessed with for weeks/months.

Mead making, chocolate crafts, chain mailing, wet felting, needle felting, crochet, clothes making, contact juggling, poi, diablo, juggling, running, HIIT, digital painting, 3d modelling, batik, watercolour painting, acrylic painting, silver smithing, creative writing...there are more I'm sure.

I'm still writing at least and one of the other hobbies has turned into a genuine profitable business and a limited company.

I have my 'art' cupboards which occasionally get raided for join art projects with my mum making props for church.

Most of my ideas get curtailed by DH now or stop at the obsessive planning/research stage before any actual money gets spent. We discuss be before buying non essentials and he's good at talking me down 😭.

I wonder if it's a very (very) mild kind of bi-polar. Rationality seems to disappear and anything seems possible!

Sounds like typical ADHD. A good friend of mine has it and she regularly has an intense new interest,goes all out for it for a couple of months,then loses interest. Then a couple of weeks later,there's a new hobby.

No, I have OCD. I’m on Sertraline to control it. I have intrusive thoughts and have to do certain things, follow patterns or keep things a certain way in order to prevent the bad outcomes of these thoughts. I’m diagnosed. Have suffered for many years. Generally keep it low level now with medication, but get terrible anxiety if my life becomes disorganised in any way.

DH is diagnosed with dyslexia. Got a free computer etc when we were at uni. I suspect ADHD but he’s never get a diagnosis now. However, more than willing not to assume ADHD.

Sounds like me. I also have ADHD.

This is me! I went along to a 'back to netball' group. Got totally obsessed, joined two clubs, spent £100 on special trainers, bought a massive post and hoop off Facebook MarketPlace for my tiny back garden. 2 months later I had lost interest.

Same with face painting. Spent ££ on paint and brushes that are sat in the cupboard. See also buying essential oils and Shea butter to make homemade beauty products, yoga equipment, vegan cooking and running!

Fortunately mine plays golf, watches a lot of tv sport and snores on the sofa - bliss 😂 He makes up for all this because he’s great the rest of the time. The grass is always greener …..

DH was this way. No ADHD, he just got very enthusiastic about the next big thing. He'd usually do it for a while before abandoning it though. He learned to make lovely pickled veg, for example, and homemade German-style sauerkraut and cold-smoked fish, all of which were excellent although I was always a little afraid of being poisoned. He also made his own tofu a few times, which was fairly indistinguishable from store-bought so I never saw the point, but he did acquire an authentic Japanese tofu press. He 'fed' his sourdough starter for a month or so, then forgot about it until I found a mysterious dried-out lump atop the fridge. He never learned to play the banjo although he did purchase a very nice one, ditto the bongos. We had a half-dug koi pond in the garden for many years; it looked like a fresh grave. And all the projects that never got off the ground, the vegetable-growing kits, the doomed herbs and houseplants, the sewing machine that never got used because none of us could thread it, the manual coffee grinder, the outdoor pizza oven from Italy, the darkroom that the downstairs loo was going to become... Although I'm not like that at all, it never really bothered me except for the garage stuffed full of pointless abandoned gadgets. In other ways I'm easily bored too, so I guess I could understand it.

Oh yes, we’ve had cider, painting, seeds and nut mixes etc

To be honest the worst was the beetroot soup phase. He was adamant that his nan used pickled beetroot to make the dish, but one taste and I was pretty sure pickled beetroot was not an ingredient. Maybe I’m wrong, but it tasted awful. We had a freezer full as he made bulk bulk. After his first bowl, he never ate it again.

I guess I wouldn’t mind him trying new things. That’s fine. It’s the fact he has to buy massive quantities and all the jazzy equipment for the first (and often last) go. And then we have to find space for it.

Thanks all, I’ve really enjoyed reading about all of your projects! I almost showed my husband the thread…he’s good natured so I know he’d enjoy it. But I don’t want to give him any ideas 😂

My first thought when I read the OP

He has ADHD 😂 Im exactly the same

He had ADHD too

There's nothing wrong with having it - as long as it isn't negatively impacting your life/mental health. Life's never boring!

My wife finds me annoying enough without me having to start any new hobbies etc.............

Oh I agree. I've wondered if I had it but don't seem to match much of the criteria but stuff like this isn't mentioned. I think definitely have many indicators of ASD plus demand avoidance generally. I wonder if there's a similar issue with ASD in that women present 'atypically'.

I have dyslexia as well but fairly atypical (reading and writing is fine) so feel like I'm borderline on all these different things but it's not worth it to get a full investigation done.

My dad has classic asbergers symptoms, like a walking stereotype including a special interest in trains! He has the same thing with flirting between interests. Sold a business and spent/wasted most of the money on starting a restaurant, building a boat, writing a book etc. but had the money to throw at it, hundreds of thousands of pounds!

Maybe! It never came up as a question or issue, so I've never thought about it. But as another poster said, life was never boring :)

This is me! My obsessions are mainly arts and crafts related but I’ve tried to rein myself in as I get older. I now try to focus on just one thing (creative writing/writing plays) as I just need a laptop and it takes up no space. Sounds like your DH is hyper focussing on various hobbies and quickly loses interest and moves on. I also have ADHD and when I’m hyper focused on a certain hobby it is all I can think of day and night! My son is the same.

Haha OP this is me to a T.
I love a new hobby but I never master anything 🙈
Roller skating, calligraphy, knitting, sewing, trying to make tiny doll houses 🤣
You name it, I will try it. Give it a bash & then quit.
I know I'm like this, I can't help it.
We have quite a large drawer in the house for my 'hobbies'.

Just have a one in one out rule, or maybe a two hobbies max rule.

If he wants to do something new, he has to chuck away or ebay the stuff associated with the last thing he did.

Hopefully that will focus his mind on all the stuff he is throwing away and money he is wasting.

I'm a bit like this, though there are a few long term hobbies that I've stuck at for many years now. But also have had quite a few short lived ones. Surely it's nice to have hobbies and try new things though? So many interesting and cool things to do, I don't get why you wouldn't. Do you have any hobbies OP?

I’m like this, I’m currently waiting for an ADHD diagnosis. I’m actually booked in with a coach in the hope she can help me with consistency. I felt a bit of a failure not being able to follow through with anything, but this thread has made me realise I could be a bit more lighthearted about it!

Based on this post, what I would do is talk to your DH before he gets another brainwave idea.
Use the example of the beetroot soup to illustrate your point about starting small and then if and only if it works out would you (or more likely him) invest more time and money and effort into the idea.

I mean Jeff Bezos started off in his garage and now Amazon is absolutely a behemoth of a business, so even the greats start small.

If it's small, it's manageable (for everyone) and only if it is a success, should more money go into the idea.