To hate when people repeatedly tell the same stories?

[overrainbowstars]

I have a colleague (we started one month apart) who constantly tells me about the interview process, who interviewed her, what she had to do etc.

And I just think yes we spoke about this the day we met. Why do you think I don’t know this story?!?

My sister is terrible for this too. Constantly tells me the same stories that she would have told me at the time they actually happened. But no a good 15 years later I’m still getting told about the time her uni friend walked out of their exam.

You have to be patient and listen again I think

I know someone like this too. It is very tiring, and the thing is, she thinks she is entertaining you every time. In my head, I nicknamed her "Sky News", as all her stories are just rolling on an on.

Yep my SIL has told me things dozens of times, and the weird thing is she always tells me like she is telling it for the first time. When I say ‘yeah I know, you’ve told me this before…’ she’ll still carry on with as much detail and boring minutiae. Why do they do it?

I know people like this and they drive me mad. However I've worked out that it's a kind of self soothing ritual.

I always tell them I already know and cut them off or tell they have told me X amount of times.

Yeah there is a huge correlation between people who do this and people who love the sound of their own voices

My MIL tells the same boring anecdote in slightly different ways 3 times within the same 5 mins. Sympathies.

Unfortunately with colleague I’ve done the first one and she still continues .. I haven’t tried the “you’ve told me 10 times” yet, but next time I will - because there will definitely be a next time.

I hear you. My dad has Alzheimer's and lives with us, so I'm used to hearing stories on repeat, answering the same questions over and over etc. I love him to bits but there are times when I need a break. I think I would probably find it intolerable if it was someone I worked with (who didn't have Alzheimer's!) or someone I didn't particularly like. Could you try headphones, would listening to music be considered rude in your workplace?

My ex does this. And loves the sound of his own voice.

As they begin the story that you've heard I often say 'oh yes , you've told me this, isn't this when....' so they dont have to continue, if they do its an interesting view on their social skills /interactions.
My DM did this all the time, no dementia/ alzheimers, but I just took it. She was on her own and I do think she forgot which of her 4 kids she had told!

I've recently become aware that I'm doing this and, when i realise i have repeated one of my memorable experiences, yet again, to the same person, i feel so embarrassed. I'm quite deaf, don't go out much so don't really have much to say, and at 58, I guess my brain cells are depleting. I often find myself wishing I'd not said anything at all.

My mum does this and always has done (as in its not dementia). She tells me the same story twice/three times in the same visit, even though I've heard it before. It's as if she wants to tell it in the 'perfect' way as each time it's a bit different. Telling her I know/she's told me/interrupting her doesn't work and just prolongs the agony so I just let her get on with it and let my mind drift ...

Had this yesterday. Finally told my lovely sister who I don't see that often, that she tells me about this certain book, every time we watch a TV show it's related to. How can she not remember, she definitely does not have any memory impairment.

I felt bad for saying it as she was really crestfallen and worried that she was boring people with the same stories so I won't mention anything like it again.

The trick is to discuss only things that have happened since you last saw the person.

Oh god, I hear you, my dads staying this weekend and I’ve had the usual retelling of a variety of stories I’ve heard many many times before, and once he gets going you just can’t stop him or say anything really he just carries on regardless.

I think if people see a few different people regularly they forget which ones they've told which story.

@XenoBitch In my head, I nicknamed her "Sky News", as all her stories are just rolling on an on.

🤣🤣 I might have to borrow that tactic!

A lot of the time, repeating stories is a way of affirming important memories. Telling it over is the point. I think this was better understood in the past and people were more patient and tolerant. My other half gets really irritated if I repeat anything. The end result is I keep a lot of memories to my self. He of course repeats stories too but I usually don't say anything as he's enjoying his memory.

They're seeking validation and/or bonding.

They feel like it's a shared experience. So do something else shared or let them knew you're busy.

I have a friend who I love dearly but any time she gets drunk, she repeats the same stories over and over. With me, it’s always about the time she saw my ex at a party after we separated and she wanted to punch him in the face. I just smile and nod. Another friend mentioned she does this with her too (a similar ‘I wanted to defend you’ story). I think it’s her way of trying to express affection as she struggles to do that when sober.

Conversely, my pet peeve is if you’re telling someone something and they say “I know, you’ve told me this before”. It’s so rude and dismissive. Maybe I wanted to tell you twice!!! Or maybe you could contribute something interesting to the conversation so I wouldn’t feel the need to carry it.

She keeps telling me about our manager saying she used to fuck a lot of married men in her 20s. Is that her affirming important memories?

Because she’s told me this numerous times and I’m never sure how to react. Other than eww and I don’t care and why are you telling me this,

My DH does this, but then MiL is always doing it to him so at least he realises how annoying it is! We have a code word for when one of us starts telling a story that the other person has heard before; it's a way to politely cut the other person off before they get too into their story 😂.

It is not twice though. It is lots mote than that.
The person I know would repeat her stories every time I saw her.