To think it’s rude to put the tv when you have a guest?

[worriert]

Whenever I go over to a friends house (and she’s done this when me and a mutual friend are there), she’ll say let’s watch an episode of x.

This can be episode 10 of something I don’t watch and have no interest in. Like Love Island.

Like I’ve driven the 40 minutes to see you, not to watch a program I have no interest in and zero idea as to what’s going on.

It is an odd thing to do. Does she use is as background noise and still chats to you over it or do you all silently take in the show?

I have family who leave the TV running whe. We come over and I find it so hard to talk to them. They then progressed to muting it but still having the pictures which I also found odd. Now they have kids, it runs on kids shows and I ahve taken to jsut turning it off if a child isn't actually watching it.

Yes, it is rude.

Very rude, my sister used to come to us and say "let's watch xxxxx on Netflix", put it on and we, DH and I, sat and watched it! Weird, but she is weird. Glad we are nc now.

It’s rude in that situation .

Very rude

It's really rude. I wouldn't go over there again if she kept doing that. It might have been different before streaming, but now there's no excuse!

Not long after I moved into my own home, Mum and Dad asked me round for dinner one night. As I recall it was a thankyou for installing a telephone extension for them. Not long after we'd eaten, Mum breezily announced she was going to watch Coronation Street and promptly went into the other room! I forget what Dad was up to but he was probably on the verge of falling asleep (normal for him). I've never forgotten that and thought it was quite inconsiderate.

Isn’t everything rude according to MN? 😂
Just tell her you don’t want to watch Love Island?

I don't have an issue with it. My friend does it, and it certainly doesn't bother me.

My ILs invited us to come over for our first anniversary for lunch. We declined as we had plans that were nothing that we'd do with an audience...

We went over the following week instead. They have a 60" TV on the wall behind the dining table, and stuck the football on during lunch. Nothing special, just a usual Saturday match.

I'm quite glad we didn't give up our anniversary to sit watching TV...

Why do you keep going there? She'd rather watch reality TV than speak to you. I would have taken it as a hint long ago. Either stop seeing her or meet somewhere else.

It's different if you have planned to watch something together.

Meh, i have friends who do this and can't say i've found it rude.

I would not do this with friends made after leaving uni.

But with very old childhood friends and uni friends that I lived with, we do sometimes do this. It isn't a case of them coming on a formal prearranged visit and me randomly announcing we're going to watch TV instead, it is more a case of hanging out at each others houses doing the same things we would do in our own houses but doing it while drinking tea and chatting.

It's not a hint like some PP asked, she just has limited social graces. I have a friend like this, very immature with embarrassingly bad manners - will arrive to a dinner party empty handed, will prepare herself food in her home and not offer her guests any, will put on TV assuming everyone is happy with that. I feel a bit emotional thinking about her now as I know her decades and she has zero clue how it all comes across and doesn't realise the terrible impression she makes on newer acquaintances.

Usual Saturday matches are special to football fans

I grew up in a family where the television was on pretty much all the time. People would chat over the top, I’d be reading or doing homework. I thought this was normal. It was only after I went to uni and started mixing with more middle class people, I realised that not everyone used the TV as constant background noise.

Very rude.

Perhaps she's not aware of that. You should tell her.

Strange when presumably your friend knew you were travelling a distance to see her, to put on the telly. So little consideration for your company and your time. Maybe she's not someone who likes to chat or she prefers background noise to having a lag in the conversation? I'm guessing you'll be in no hurry to go out of your way to visit her again OP.

I have a friend who puts both upstairs and downstairs TV on when she gets up. It stays on till bedtime. Always on in the background on phone calls too and visits to her home.
I find it irritating and don't understand but it's her house/her rules.
Love my friend so much so refuse to find it rude, anyone else is just super rude.

Would depend on the context. Was it the moon landings ?

The electricity bill this woman must have. Wow. My lights aren't even on in rooms I'm not in.

very rude.

I think this is one of those situations where you should say something like 'You do realise that it's rude to put the telly on when you have guests, don't you, friend?' Then see what her reaction is, as if she's never been told, she probably doesn't realise. I can't believe that you just let her go ahead and watch something that you have no interest in though, I'd have had to say something, or would have got up and left.

I can’t imagine this. It’s unbelievably rude.

@worriert that was one of the reasons I removed the tv from the lounge!! the other reason was having to pick up crisp packets and tea cups every morning (left by hubby)! visitors sit in the lounge so it is permanently tidy now!