To think it’s rude to put the tv when you have a guest?

[worriert]

Whenever I go over to a friends house (and she’s done this when me and a mutual friend are there), she’ll say let’s watch an episode of x.

This can be episode 10 of something I don’t watch and have no interest in. Like Love Island.

Like I’ve driven the 40 minutes to see you, not to watch a program I have no interest in and zero idea as to what’s going on.

@worriert I used to go to see my sis and she had a hubby and two boys! the tv was always on for football!! all bloody day, every day!! I honestly didnt know you could watch footie all day and I couldnt hear myself think!!

Wow are you sure you see her as a friend?

I'd stop visiting her. It's unbelievably rude and thoughtless. Maybe it's something her parents did but even so .....

The only time I think it's acceptable is if you have houseguests for a few days and fancy some down time. However, it should be something everyone is interested in - certainly not a random episode from halfway through a series.

Surely she can watch it online as and when there's nobody else around? Unless she only has terrestrial telly and no internet?
Even then just don't invite someone round when your fav show is on?!
Unless you were a major fan of said show and were choosing to go round to watch it together.
Yeah, rude. You should say you feel that way. It's bizarre really that someone wouldn't know it was!
Some people stare at their phones constantly when they have guests, which is just as bad.

I can understand MIL needing to see Corrie.
Or my dad having Sky News on 24/7…

But, not sitting down & watching a programme.
I don’t look at TV, so it wouldn’t be my thing!

Family I wouldn't bat an eyelid , a friend I didn't visit often maybe a bit annoying

People are strange. A friend used to spend hours telling me the plots of films and who was dating who on Strictly. Kept going no matter how many times I said I don’t know who these people are I don’t watch it. We are no longer friends!

I had a very pushy 'acquaintance' who took to called round on the pretext of our DC "playing together".
Her DD 14, mine 5 🤔

As soon as she turned up she asked me to switch Corrie on as they were following the storyline. I never watched it.

Both her and her DD sat glued to it, didn't speak to me and she left after draining her coffee and biscuits.
All further attempts at visiting were flat refused. CF!

My DH does this. Whether it's a sports game or whatever. It's freaking rude.

This. It’s a way of hanging out and socialising for lots of people - look at Gogglebox! If you don’t want to watch then just say you’d rather chat and I’m sure she won’t put it on, but I don’t think it’s rude - she’s trying to socialise with you, thinking you’ll chat about the programme.

To give context - if I’m hanging out with a close friend or family, we might well watch telly together. I probably wouldn’t the first time I met my partner’s family or something, but it’s not that weird for lots of people - I think you just need to talk to her as you clearly have different views. I’m sure she’ll understand!

Extremely rude. I would stop visiting her.

I was brought up in a house where the TV went off if anybody came round. Even the bloke to collect the Pools money (this was the 70's). A lot of my friends got the opinion that we never had the TV on at all - we did, but only when there was something someone wanted to watch. None of this channel hopping in those days. In consequence, I always turn the TV off if anyone comes round now, as I've always felt it's rude to have to try to compete with it.

Very normal among our families.

Depends on level of familiarity. The more familiar you are with them, the more they'll be able to relax with you and watch dumb shit on the telly. The more distant and formal the meeting, the greater the likelihood of the TV being switched off (or turned on to the radio instead).

I’m quite grateful to read this thread and that the majority find it rude.

I moved out of my parents at 19, we were close but I struggled to live there and was desperate for independence.

I worked 6 nights a week and a lot of time saw my parents on the 7th, they would invite me but then put the tv on and watch all the soaps and I had to be completely silent. I’ve never watched tv and asked if they could record them but they were adamant it stayed on.
They would be upset and hurt if I left, I was told many times that my sister would sit and watch the tv with them and I was being awkward not watching with them.

I always felt like I was needy and just desperate for attention, it’s good to know now that it’s not just me that thinks if you want someone to visit then it might be nice to spend time talking with them!

ILs always had some form of sport on all day at the weekend, there seemed to be an invisible rule set around what happened if they had visitors but basically the tele was only left on with the sound on for family/close friends, less close friends it was muted, everyone else it got turned off. The first time they didn’t touch it when I went round was like being welcomed to the family 🤣🤣🤣

We don't do this with friends, but when my parents or in-laws come to stay, we secretly line up films to put on in the evenings to avoid conversation devolving into heated debate over the various types of crazy offered up.

Yes, massively rude. If someone calls and you are watching something, you turn it off. Not on!

It’s so rude.

I visited a friend once (who invited me over) and kept shhhing me because “I like this program…”

Didn’t go back.

I’m on a FB decorating group and loads of people turn on the television to take their photos. It’s very strange.

What do you mean?

If you think I'm slagging her off, I'm not - my point which may not have come across is that she's oblivious to other people's expectations and not being rude to them. She would be fine with all these things the other way around. She's a middle aged teenager basically and we (longterm friends) accept her exactly as she is.

If you think she's not my friend, she very much is. She just doesn't register societal niceties or expectations.

It wasn't even the family team.

It was putting on a 60" TV that was BEHIND half the diners, which half of the guests weren't interested in. Especially me - one half of the couple who were supposedly being given a special celebratory meal.

It did come across as slagging her off. But now you have clarified I do see what you mean. I also have a friend like this and I guess I just wouldn't of spoke about her so bluntly.

I've now got to the point I have started to bring her up on a few things, funny thing is she is still oblivious lol.

I would find it rude and would not be keen to go back. I don't want to watch tv at other peoples houses.

Weird.

Yes! This is something that annoys me too. We go over a family members house and they're sat with the TV on, I find it rude. We tell them to turn it off now.