Visited parents for them to make stupid jokes.

[ThePerkyCoralPoet]

Visited my parents to drop dinner over. Myum
kwpt waffling about something after work and I said “how many times have we heard this now” she then turned around and nudged my dad and said “ooh look at her. She’s rude. She’s not my daughter. My daughter is supposed to have manners” at which point I got in the car and ignored her and drove back to mine. She thinks I’m being unreasonable and a brat. I however. Think what she said was rude and stupid.

Aibu?

Oh sure you do. In fact, she just did.

What would you have preferred?
Abject apologies?
Groveling for daring to waffle in your presence?

What a great update, OP. Wel done for going back and apologising. It's never easy to admit that you're in the wrong

I'm glad things turned out well.

How do you even have the energy to operate with this level of drama over absolutely fuck all. Reading your messages tired me out. Your poor mum 🤦‍♀️

Good on you- sleep well, you’ll laugh about this in a few weeks. Sleep well 💐

Why are you dropping off dinner ? is their cooker not working.
as if Mum is young enough and well enough to work, why didn't she cook for herself and Dad ?

Fair play, we can all lose it but it's how you deal with it. You only have one mother x

You sound like my eldest dd. She falls out with people regularly and its always their fault.

I love her but I dont take her crap and she sulks for ages after I call her out. One example, woman who totally fucked up her booking on a train and ended up in our seats with her husband. In the right seats but on the wrong the train and massively kicked off. DD was all up in her hat about it and I just found the train manager who sorted it. This was two years ago. She STILL goes on about it now.

Then last weekend, we booked tickets with booked seats but for some reason the last two stops our seats were unreserved for us and were booked for someone else. She kicked off about that too, especially when I realised what had happened, apooigised and insisted we move (ten minutes until our stop) so they could take their seats (a much longer journey). I should have told them to fuck off apparantly. Its been 4 days and she hasnt been in touch, normally calls every day. I messaged her and had nothing back.

As I say to DD, save your ire for things that matter. This doesnt.

Er, if anyone was rude it was you! Your mum was merely stating the truth.

It's nice to have both your parents. I think you should try to think about that, be happy you have them. Be with them. Be nice. Don't get all offended. And the comment might have been annoying but I think it was meant as quite light.

I think you should say sorry and make it up with them.

The OP has updated.

Ffs is that what you took from all this.

I regularly drop dinner at my Mums. There's a few meals I make from scratch that she particularly likes. When I make them I make extra & drop some off for her

She's perfectly capable of cooking and does but I do it because its a nice thing to do, she's my Mum, and it gives her a night off cooking.

Good on you OP! I can totally emphasise, my Mum tells me the same story over and over and it drives me mad sometimes, but I realise she's getting older and forgetful of who of the children she's told the story to, and sometimes she's just looking to fill a silence 😂I'm also totally guilty of telling people something I've already told them, so I just listen and say the same thing I said before!

I think your Mum's reaction would have annoyed me before, but she may have felt defensive that you were calling her out on having had the conversation before, and is sensitive about ageing. Glad it's sorted, and I'd probably give yourselves more grace next time. Let her say her piece and let you be frustrated but nod along!

If my DD said something as sarcastic and rude as that to me when I was speaking then I'd have expressed my disappointment that my daughter had such poor manners. I wouldn't have tried to make out I was joking though. I'd have been entirely serious. Perhaps that's where your mother went wrong. Probably nervous of your sharp tongue and went for the passive aggressive rather than the assertive, which granted is annoying. However I think this is a case of reap what you sow. If someone is telling you something you've heard before a polite 'oh did you forget, you told me this already' usually suffices.

@ThePerkyCoralPoet fair dos to you, it's not always easy to go back and admit you were in the wrong. I hope tomorrow is a better day!

I had a really bad day at work. I have to regulate my emotion all day at my job. Sometimes I’m just not capable of doing it at home.

@ThePerkyCoralPoet great that you went back, I sometimes flare up with my dd or her with me, not often but every few months, usually because we are tired or misinterpret what the other one is saying, but we always go back, apologise and make up, I try not to lose it too, but very occasionally I do!

I'm so glad you went back OP, it sounds like you had a really rough day and it is so easy to accidentally take it out on the ones we love the most, because we know they will still love us regardless no matter what we do or say.

You did the right thing and I hope you have a better day tomorrow.

God you're charm personified.

Team mum!

This 👆🏼
I’d give anything to listen to my Mum waffling again - even if I’d heard it all a million times before. I lost her to Cancer 12 years ago, and miss her incredibly every second of every day.

Well done for apologising OP… we all have bad days and you’ve recognised that and done the right thing. Rest well and tomorrow is a new day x

Sounds like a bad day.

and btw it’s nice that you took dinner over , so you clearly care

I think it’s normal and very human. I can be very sensitive and sometimes need to just have that understood. But I knew I was being a brat. So I went back.

But you were rude first, and are the one one making a big thing of her being rude in response. I don’t understand why you think it’s ok for you to be rude to her but not ok for her to be rude to you.

Edit: Sorry, I now see you went back and both apologised. Great.

You need to get used to it sometimes I think my mum has a prerecorded script where she repeats the same stuff on a loop - no matter how many times I say yes you’ve told me this it doesn’t ever stop

18 years for me. It still hurts. She did drive me mad sometimes and I probably did the same to her.

I'm at the age where I repeat anecdotes. I don't remember which DC I've told each one too. They're mostly shite anyway I suppose but that's life!

@ThePerkyCoralPoet maybe don't call in with your parents when you have had a bad day. Less margin for annoyance!

She Put my favourite cookie dough in the oven when I stormed out. I went back. I apologised when they answered the door. We had the cookie dough and ice cream. I cried and said I’m sorry. Sometimes I can’t find the ability to regulate.