To find this so cringeworthy?

[Bpuss]

(I realise using the word cringeworthy is a bit cringeworthy in itself, but here we are...)

Literally posting this so I don't end up telling him what I'm thinking!

I've been seeing a guy off and on for a year and he's a lovely person, but keeps coming out with things that just make me die a little inside.

The latest one is he went to the cinema with his friends last night to see Wicked.
He has this habit of messaging me after he's seen a film to let me know how he found it and the message last night read "It had greatest showman vibes, and the hallmarks of a classic". I almost, almost... replied with a bunch of laughy faces and told him to stop talking like a dick but I thought I should try and be kind so I just said something about being glad he likes it.

But I've never heard anyone in real life use the phrase "hallmarks of a classic" to describe a film, let alone something like Wicked?!

He also uses the word belly for his stomach...

I like him, but omg I cringe so hard sometimes at his choice of words!

He is sharing his authentic self with you, and I think that’s great. If he’s not for you and the vocab is a deal breaker for you, that’s your choice. Just please don’t try to get him to wear a mask around you and hide his true self.

I’d find that cute. Are you sure you like him…

Well it does; molasses more so!

I think Op that you need to move on.

Other people not being bothered isn't really relevant imo.

I wonder if this is how people get "stuck" in a relationship?

I like the sound of him. And the description of what it feels for him to be turned on is far more detailed than anything my husband would come out with...but if you've got the ick then you've got the ick.

I feel sorry for him. What he said about the film sounded perfectly normal to me. It's not as if he went on and on - just a couple of sentences which give a bit more info than 'I really enjoyed it.' It's not as if he's being really pretentious - he isn't.

He actually sounds really sweet. Is he too nice for you?

If you'd enabled voting then I would have definitely said you are being unreasonable.

Yeah ‘hallmarks of a classic’ is a bit of a cliche… but then so is ‘makes me die a little inside’ so I guess we all have our little phrases. Maybe he cringes when he hears you say that?!

Spectacularly missing the point

Absolutely fine💯

My dp is a cinephile - he watches absolutely every single new release in the cinema, except horror films because they scare him - and he would absolutely both 1) see this film (alone or with someone, as the case may be) 2) say something like the above, and I wouldn't find it odd at all.

He just loves the cinema and critiquing films, and he literally knows almost every single film that's ever been released in the western hemisphere. I think it's a great hobby!

@EvilsElsasPetSnowman

Honestly having a “Alpha” husband like yours isn’t the flex you think it is.

It's not a positive. I never said it was.

@EvilsElsasPetSnowman

they’re probably TOO manly for the likes of respect and fidelity towards women and their families

Nice

@EvilsElsasPetSnowman

I just find it sad that you’re so proud to be married to be a selfish sexist. It’s such a damaging trope

Not proud in the slightest. Actually the opposite.

@EvilsElsasPetSnowman

was a film about Willy Wonka making his penis fall off or something? This is seriously odd behaviour, and your poor girls having to watch their dad leave family time. Let’s hope they find better men than you have.

You have issues

@SleepyHippy3 as I explained or tried to in further posts, I thought this thread was light-hearted? It's true I don't like musical theatre but who cares if I know the plot/premise of Wicked or not? I did not think that was the point of the OP.

oh @pluvia you've jumped the shark now. I believed you really thought that about Wicked, but now you're just pretending you think it's Disney, to troll us.

I haven't swallowing any hype. I read some niche books about 15 years ago and followed the idea that they would be turned into a musical. I agree that there are broad emotional strokes in the story as it exists in the musical. It's not a spiky as Hadestown or Spring Awakening for example, other musicals about relationships, self image and politics. But I think that's partly the point of what it is trying to say. It isn't saying BeKind, and I'd be interested in which aspects of the work you think give that impression.

I don't think Stephen S's other musicals are much to write home about but the music here is undoubtedly very clever.

As it happens I think the film is a rather ponderous and heavy handed version of the musical, but it still isn't what you think it is based on no evidence.

Film review is ok, ‘belly’ is horrible

Well the sneery way you commented about someone else’s husband not being manly makes me think you’re proud of the manliness of your OH.

I suppose our definitions of manly differ. I don’t see manly as a big sexist baby who is offended by a musical so huffs out the cinema.

No, I’m pretty normal and don’t assign depressing stereotypes to sexes.

I know loads of men who are / have seen Wicked.

Your partner's review wasn't wrong.

Loads of people I know say belly. "Beer belly" - v normal.

Really don't see the problem but I guess he's not for you if such things are annoying you.

Up thread you said that if a man and his mates were going to watch Wicked you would go into red flag over drive, but that’s not really light hearted. So why would you say something something like this , even though you had no idea what the film about, and you were negatively judging these men?

@SleepyHippy3 it would seem so. Why is everyone not taking it in a lighthearted way, based on OP's tone? It's still true I never have and never will date someone into musical theatre. Why do you care so much?

That's so bad. Do you think the same way about women? For example, if a woman wanted to see Die Hard then she would be a lesbian?