To have expected more in life from working to reach this salary?

[grethrow]

I’m early forties and earn 75k. I know this isn’t huge money but it’s well above average salaries in the uk. I worked hard to get to this point (I’m not saying people who earn less don’t work hard).

I guess along the way I always thought I would be able to have a really comfortable life on this salary. I have one ds who is 11 but his costs don’t really factor in much as his dad pays for most stuff (ds lives with me so dad pays a decent amount).

I assumed going on holiday would be easy but renting a cottage in Devon in a nice area for a week is around 1,500, then there’s travel costs and food etc when you’re there! Going abroad long haul is extortionate. I guess these things are just about doable for me but it’s not easy.

I am having a privileged whinge. I know that. But I do feel sometimes like maybe at 18 I shouldn’t have bothered. My parents had a similar income (taking into account inflation) and me and my brother both went to independent schools, grew up in a large home and parents had very nice cars. It wouldn’t be possible for me to go and buy a nice car outright. I know people have it much worse but I still feel cheated and like it is a slog for very little, fair of me to feel this? Do others feel this?

The thimg is that on 75k one shouldn't need to use budget apps, shop in discount stores etc, should they.

That's the point. It's high salary on paper and to many but in realkty OP cannot afford things people think 75k income should be able to afford with ease.

120 a week shop on 75k should not be some bank breaking thing. But it may be and that means 75 is not that fine and dandy and amazing as many still seem to think. It ain't 2010 anymore.

What relevance has this got to the OP’s question?

Indeed.

And once people work that out, and realise where that money is going, there will be a revolution in the UK.

You do realise what the median wage in the UK is?

Yes less than half of what you earn!!

When you say you shouldn't have bothered at 18 where do you think you'd be now.

Everybody has been hit by rising costs but those like yourself are likely to be in a better position than many others

Sometimes people need perspective. 75k is an incredible privilege that many don't have. Budget better!

And once people work that out, and realise where that money is going, there will be a revolution in the UK.

No, for one many have benefited from the house price growth.

Lots of better off people have little disposable income because they have high set outgoings. If you have a large mortgage you can be on a massive salary and still have little disposable income. Overall income is what matters.

I know what you mean OP.

My problem is living in London though, which is stupid. Can’t move til kids leave home as their Dad is in the area too and they’re settled in schools.

Sometimes people need perspective. 75k is an incredible privilege that many don't have. Budget better!

Wages have stagnated for years, housing costs are ridiculous, we have younger people wanting to leave the country because they can get paid more elsewhere, plummeting birth rates & an ageing population.

@grethrow you are not allowed to moan about money on mumsnet unless you are rummaging in the bins behind Waitrose.

FWIW, I don’t earn anywhere near what you do but I get it. You should be able to have nice things but the reality is very different.

But they would very likely be receiving benefits or living in a low cost area… am I missing something here?

I don’t even understand the point, should OP imagine living on 10% of her pre-tax income.

Overall income is what matters.

I think it’s if & when you bought your home but unfortunately many can’t control that.

Your example of a household with multiple kids on less than £7.5k a year, is essentially a household where no one is working, or working 16 hours a week max.

What perspective does this offer OP, exactly?

Noting that the support which allows families to live in that scenario comes from… people like OP paying a shedload of tax!

The one I linked is a beautiful converted chapel, not exactly slumming it and if the one I have linked isn’t “Luxurious” enough for OP then what little sympathy I had has completely run out, where’s my tiny violin…….. and yes she could get a villa abroad for that price, so what’s her issue?

Exactly.

And the very negative reactions to this post are just really sad, because this element affects everyone, whether you're on £25k or £75k. Those on £25k have a shittier standard of living than they should too, and nor is that OK.

@NotMyCircus99

i have never said that?

But not sure how it isn’t obvious that 1500 just for a week holiday without food or travel is difficult

My income is very similar to yours, in Scotland so much higher taxes. I have 2 DC and can easily afford a couple of holidays a year. With reasonable housing costs what on earth are you spending £4k plus on a month.

lol at "rummaging in the bins behind Waitrose" @Wherethewildthingsfart

@grethrow

take what you need to hear from this thread & ignore the rest 🤷🏻‍♀️ ( including mine if it's not what you need!!)

how much is that net a month? (Saying if it's before or after your pension) & how much child support does EX PAY? It's all anonymous, so you don't need to be shy.

im 54 now, 30+ years ago I decided to jump, no leap, off the corporate ladder into 'life' in many ways I don't regret it (lived in fab places, travelled, met people I wouldn't have otherwise.

However, it has had a detrimental affect on my financial situation.

i don't know what I'd be earning now if I'd stayed on my career path (other than shit loads more than I was until recently, been made redundant & in my line of work & with my health issues, I'm not likely to earn, even that, again. (38,000). It's a scary place to be, too many years until retirement for state pension & pissy private pension (might keep me in milk & tea bags!).

But whatever my salary was now, i think I'd feel the same as you. I'd have expected my current salary to facilitate a higher standard of living.

Holidays are expensive & yes you can 'go cheaper' on them, but thst really isn't you point is it!?!

vent away, many of us (even in very financially different places - both up & down from you, understand what you're saying.

but stay grounded as you currently are & enjoy the place you are in (even though it's not what you expected) & you can make good career jumps still (early 40's, child without huge childcare costs etc and really concentrate on making good financial decisions for later life and you'll appreciate your hard work paying off!!

Oh & despite maybe not sounding like it, I have worked very hard. Just in a different way & had an ex partner sneakily whip OUR business away from under my feet. ( long & boring story!). Life happens.

We bring in roughly 75k between 2 of us, have 2 small children and still holiday abroad at least once a year (and we like hice holidays) plus a UK holiday, and we can afford days out / weekends away. I'd say we have an average home and car, and we use wrap around / nursery 4 days a week.
We know how to budget, look for deals/ offers, and if money is tight we're perfectly happy doing free things like national trust, picnics in the park, self catering breaks etc.

To be fair though, I do see your point despite it not being a bad wage. DH and I both have professional jobs and although we don't have to watch the pennies, we've both worked incredibly hard to climb the ladder at work and are both earning far more than when we started, I've sacrificed a less stressful role for more money at management level- and for what? To have the same spend as before, because the COL is rising and ridiculously high.

I guess the bright side is that had we not worked this hard, we'd be struggling rather than coasting right now. I can't afford the type of lifestyle I foresaw myself having at this point in my life, but equally I'm grateful we can afford all the things we need. It'll all pay off once the mortgage is paid that's what I keep telling myself 😂

I was going to say how an earth are you not comfortable on that salary with one child, as I, late 30s, earn just under £20k less. But then I realised I have a dual income as DH earns roughly the same as me so we are in excess of £100k.

I hear you, it is hard, cost of living has hit everyone. We basically save a pittance each month as our outgoings are so high.

You know that others have it much worse, so think you are entitled to a priviliged whinge!

@LoveIsLikeAFartIfYouHaveToPushItsUsuallyShit

yeah this is exactly my point. It shouldn’t be a stretch! The fact people on less money are saying to suck it up and stop complaining… if I WAS living a comfortable life on this salary then their salary, even if less, would be worth more too

It isn't huge money?

The comments on this thread are something else.

I completely get what you mean. I'm on a higher salary than you - but I assumed people who earned my salary would have a pretty luxurious life. I'm incredibly fortunate we can travel often (always economy!), own a home (still fairly modest) and don't have to worry about money on a daily basis. But it's not what I had imagined for this role I've pretty much worked my ass off for 10 years AND been extremely lucky to get.

I was going to say how an earth are you not comfortable on that salary with one child, as I, late 30s, earn just under £20k less. But then I realised I have a dual income as DH earns roughly the same as me so we are in excess of £100k.

I hear you, it is hard, cost of living has hit everyone. We basically save a pittance each month as our outgoings are so high.

You know that others have it much worse, so think you are entitled to a priviliged whinge!