To have expected more in life from working to reach this salary?

[grethrow]

I’m early forties and earn 75k. I know this isn’t huge money but it’s well above average salaries in the uk. I worked hard to get to this point (I’m not saying people who earn less don’t work hard).

I guess along the way I always thought I would be able to have a really comfortable life on this salary. I have one ds who is 11 but his costs don’t really factor in much as his dad pays for most stuff (ds lives with me so dad pays a decent amount).

I assumed going on holiday would be easy but renting a cottage in Devon in a nice area for a week is around 1,500, then there’s travel costs and food etc when you’re there! Going abroad long haul is extortionate. I guess these things are just about doable for me but it’s not easy.

I am having a privileged whinge. I know that. But I do feel sometimes like maybe at 18 I shouldn’t have bothered. My parents had a similar income (taking into account inflation) and me and my brother both went to independent schools, grew up in a large home and parents had very nice cars. It wouldn’t be possible for me to go and buy a nice car outright. I know people have it much worse but I still feel cheated and like it is a slog for very little, fair of me to feel this? Do others feel this?

Exactly 💯. I'd literally give anything to give back a decade and not have a head injury, post concussion syndrome, then be injured after by an off label antipsychotic that gave me a movement disorder 💔😭

But, having said that, I know my friend would give absolutely anything to have a child after two rounds of failed IVF... and I have been very blessed with three wonderful children. Life is very much appreciated if you look at what you do have. ❤️

I think OPs point is entirely reasonable. This thread is increasingly full of Uriah Heaps who are “ever so ‘umble ” and all about cutting their costs and watching their pennies and feeling blessed if they can afford a lump of coal for the fire come Christmas Eve.

Seriously though, fuck that.

£75k is a really difficult salary to attain in the UK, and you’re damned right that you should expect it to buy you more than it does.

The system is increasingly becoming fucking obscene, ordinary jobs pay less and less as the cost of living increases more and more. The proportion of society that is really benefitting is increasingly tiny - the profits of our labour are flowing into the hands of the Jeff Bezos and Elon Musks of the world, the rest of us are fighting like rats over the scraps. Look at the difference between CEO remuneration to the rest of the employees of a company and look at how that compares to historic averages - we’re in a new world.

The OP expresses unhappiness at the system, that our work doesn’t get us more spending power than it currently does. Rather than agreeing that we should all be getting a better life for the work we put in you get a load of passive, forelock tugging sheep saying “well I earn less than you so you should be happy and keep your head down”.

None of us should be happy. OP shouldn’t be happy. You shouldn’t be happy (unless you are actually Jeff Bezos or Elon Musk in which case you’ll be having a right old chuckle to yourself).

Expect more. Demand more. If you don’t, we’ll just keep getting less and less.

Your salary isn't just well above - it's almost twice what most people earn, and more. You're probably very disconnected from how most people have to live & budget as a result of your upbringing.

If you were a single parent in London, having bought a house recently in a semi-decent area there, then I could see how a single income of 75k income wouldn't stretch that far, but otherwise, I think you have a spending problem and are used to living out of your means and keeping up with the Jones'.

I earn around what you earn OP but only work 4 days so get four fifths of it. DH has his own business and earns about 60 - 70% of what I earn, so overall more than you but there are 4 of us. We're older and I benefitted from being able to buy a home as a single person in my 20s and we have done well buying further properties since. We also have had family money passed on which meant we paid off our mortgage a short while ago.

Since doing that we suddenly have enough money to relatively easily pay for two holidays abroad a year without dipping into savings. But our children are grown up and though they live rent free at home, both have jobs which means they pay their own way for clothing, entertainment, phones and travel etc. We have always bought second hand cars.

We're lucky that we have always had money from our families but we have struggled for a long time to really live within our income - although by that I mean we have managed to mostly pay for holidays out if it, so we could have easily cut down by not going. Holidays have definitely been our biggest excess expense so I sympathise with your position.

Bills are far higher than they used to be years ago. Gas and electricity was once negligible but is now our biggest regular outgoing every month after groceries. Mortgage rates used to be much higher than they've been in recent years (changing now) but the difference is housing has become much more difficult to afford.

I can see how £75k might not be that much for you if you want to have a certain quality of life. However I do think £140 a week on food and essentials is a lot for one adult and one child. We pay about that for 4 adults in London.

Everyone has a lower quality of life than people in equivalent jobs/salaries 20 or 30 years ago. That's because the cost of living has gone up. If you are on 75k and you can't afford a holiday in Devon, despite having most of the costs of DC covered by ex, I'd suggest you are not budgeting that well. No you won't be able to afford big house, car, private school etc etc but you certainly should be able to afford a week in Devon.

I didn't say we were feeling the pinch either.

I’m 45 and earn less than half your salary. IN a twenty year career. I still have a lovely life with holidays. Being in the role i am that kind of wage you have isn’t going to happen for me but wow i’d feel like i was loaded!

To be fair OP, you have to buy or pay for food wherever you are on holiday. Even AI has factored in the cost of the salmonella buffet.

I think it's the generational comparison which is not helping you. Times have changed. In the past a while family could be supported by one salary. If you had a gp or lawyer salary you could afford to send multiple children to top boarding schools and have a lovely house not too far from london.

I'm sure you have a comfortable life it's just probably nothing like your parents. It doesn't help that the generation before us offered us advice on how to achieve what they have, not realising that without inheriting money those things are beyond reach even with a very good job and a lot of hard work.

I think growing up the sound of £75k was a mega salary in terms of thinking you’d want for nothing and not have to think about budgets etc and with inflation etc it’s not what it was when we were young and expectations as to what gets you what need adjusting as it’s been subtle but sustained over many years now. It is still a mighty salary but not what it once was

There’s a big gap between being able to buy a nice car outright and being able to afford £100 for a night out.

We earn that between us, and we spend around £5-10k a year on holidays. Mtg is higher than yours.

I’d look at your other outgoings and see where it’s all going!

I know this isn’t huge money

Which planet are you on? have a look at minimum wage and pension rates....

Wages for everyone have fallen in real terms. Everyone earns less now than they would have done at one time. And some jobs wages have fallen much more than others.
Its also worth noting that some jobs in the past can not be compared to the equivalent title in the past, Branch bank managers for example used to make the decisions that head office now make. It carried a lot more responsibility than now. And GPs had to provide 24 hour care for their patients. They were expected to go to patients in the middle of the night if need be.

I bought it on the open market, not from the council. I paid £100k for it 22 years ago, which is £180k in today’s money. The same houses on that street are going for £170-180k today so they haven’t really gone up at all once you factor inflation in. I appreciate though that a small northern town isn’t typical of the whole UK.

It's Mumsnet. There are quite a few wealthy women on here, and the OP likely lives in a bubble of people like her who feel like 75k & more doesn't get them much.

Yes some house prices have not risen more than in line with inflation. We lost money when we sold our house 24 years ago. Our current house has went up more than inflation though.

No I agree. Myself and my partner work full time and have good salaries about 60k each with working extra shifts. Joint income is quite a lot. And we still struggle each month but our mortgage is about 1500 a month. Food in itself costs about £700 a month and that’s not factoring all the other bills. So yes on paper we should be well off but we have to work extra shifts to pay for a holiday abroad each year. We have 3 children. Don’t get me wrong bills and food are paid each month but it doesn’t leave a lot left over.

But being able to go on holiday IS a comfortable lifestyle. Being able to spend over a hundred pounds a week for 2 people at Tesco IS a comfortable lifestyle. I think you have a very skewed way of looking at your life OP.

You also have to remember because you earn 75k on paper you don’t come out with anywhere near that due to tax and high tax rate.
my deductions each month from student loan tax NI are about £1400!! That’s over 1/3 of my salary!

I've taken early retirement and my income is 60k before tax. I live a very comfortable life and have several weeks in France with the kids each summer. I still have three kids at home and I run two cars and eat out several times a week. I'm not sure what you are doing with your money........

Also if OP had described it as a lot, the thread would've gone completely the other way and be teeming with people ready to tell her it's peanuts and wouldn't cover their Ocado bill.

That’s a fallacy and not what it seems.

Doesn’t mean the household is living off 7.5k. Means the owner or tenant earns 7.5k. Doesn’t include if house is owned outright with no mortgage and child maintenance of thousands a month is being paid (as CM is not counted in fsm eligibility. Lots of people are on legacy fsm system (where Freshholds much more generous or are entitled to fsm as were eligible years ago for whatever reason). Doesn’t include PIP or DLA either or whether council tax and rent is social housing or paid by gment etc. Many many people earn more than 7.5k and see less in their pocket than someone “on” 7.5k.

Take home about £4k after pension and student loan. Plus CM

Mortgage and car loan about £1400

Obviously food and other bills but even if these come to £1600 including savings for things like car repairs that still leaves around £1k pm to be spent on nights out, holidays and other non essentials.

Shouldn’t people be worried that even those in the top 20%, 10% feel like the trade off isn’t working? If everyone feel like “what was the point” what does it do for productivity for the UK?

Exactly!

Unfortunately, whenever this topic comes up, whether it's a higher, lower or middle earner making the point, too many people respond based on the level of sympathy they have for the person. But we have an underlying structural problem. It's the same one, it just manifests differently depending where you are on the income scale.