To not understand adult food vs kids food?

[SofandaCox]

I meet up occasionally with my old baby group. Our babies are 3 now. We met up yesterday for lunch and there’s a few in the group that are firmly in the adult foods are separate to kids food camp and I find it so bizarre. They make really weird comments like “why would you give that to a child” “my child would never eat that” “I wouldn’t waste that on a child” etc. my child has a long list of allergies and I’ve had gastric surgery so can’t much so we usually share a meal. The offending meal? Calamari. Basically chicken nuggets but wish squid. They acted like I had just purchased my toddler a fillet mignon with champagne and lobster tail. Which, again, don’t see the issue if that’s what he wanted! Has anyone experienced this? And also just to be so rude as to sit there and actually make comments about it. I’ve had judgey thoughts about them feeding their 3 year old jarred baby food but I’ve kept that to myself. It’s making me not want to meet up with them anymore but it would be a shame for my son as he enjoys spending time with the others toddlers.

The best not expensive restaurants do not tend to offer childrens menus. They are family run independent places who are more than happy to make adjustments to food for children.

My DD currently is only happy to eat chips, sausages or meatballs when we eat out so calamari sounds great. I couldn't be bothered with what other kids eat and if someone commented on it I would respond at the time. Must try calamari next time.

I’m sure you’ll agree that this is quite an extreme and unusual case. I know a lot of families where little kids are given sweet drinks, ketchup etc not because it is the last resort to make them maintain a healthy weight.

I really don’t see how this is a stealth boast. I genuinely don’t understand why there needs to be separate menus, not just smaller portions. I eat chicken nuggets and I’m 31, not a child so I don’t see why that’s a “child’s food”. It’s just food.

No, it’s really not. Most people I know are very intent on weaning only with fresh veg and whole unprocessed foods. Baby led weaning is huge because the whole idea is you give the baby some of what you're eating. Most people are terrified about giving their toddlers ultra processed foods these days. I’ve never done ‘kids’ food, I’d say this is a very dated concept.
Maybe ‘some’ people’s children eat rubbish, but that’s the same in any other country I’ve live in/ travelled to.

I genuinely remember reading this exact post a while ago. Is it just me? It was the exact same word for word.

I agree that it's a British cultural thing, and I've seen it in the US too.

It comes from a complete lack of connection to food and eating as part of family life.

To be honest I think it’s 99% luck and nothing to do with superior parenting how fussy a child ends up being with food.
its the reason some people have two children who will eat everything and anything then have a third who will only eat beige food.
IME every child I’ve known who has been ‘fussy’ or restricted with food there has always been underlying sensory or ND issues.
I’ve known people who have done fresh goods BLW etc and ended up with an extremely picky eater, likewise babies weaned on jars/pouches 99% of the time and have very varied palettes as older children.

Although once your kids are older literally nobody asks or cares how they were weaned or fed as babies/toddlers 🙄

It's not the commenting she was referring to.

It was the unquestioned idea that there is such a thing as "kid food", that kids couldn't possibly like or want anything else.

This thread is dripping with privilege.

Yes, I've entertained children similarly bamboozled - by homemade mashed potatoes, shepherd's pie, meatloaf, spaghetti with meatballs, homemade mac 'n cheese, chili with noodles, and many other very basic foods.

Also children who had clearly never used a knife and fork or drunk from anything but a water bottle.

All from well off families.

@MumblesParty - I don't think it's a stealth boast. Thing stealthy about it - it's a boast boast. Boasty mcBoast face

Again, that's not a cultural thing. It's an individual opinion which most people don't share. But some people do, regardless of where they are from.

I don't expect it to be half the price but yes, across most of Europe and other places children's portions of adult meals are cheaper than the adult portion. Accommodating and treating children well brings in the whole family.

Also the incremental cost to the restaurant of providing two plates to share one portion is tiny against the income from a whole family dining in the restaurant.

Those things were all normal when I was a child in the U.K. too. You ate what you were given (or went without) - there was never any question of anything being cooked (it was all from scratch) specially for a fussy kid. And I did have a Dsis who was extremely fussy - still is!

No choice for school dinners, either - you were allowed one fad, otherwise you had to eat it. My fad was meat fat, which I still can’t bear.

Of course this was all back in the Dark Ages, when many people still remembered rationing.

I never did kids food really. Sometimes they would have goujons or something but mainly they ate what we did. And they like Calamari too.

This seems like a bit of a generalisation - as is proved from this thread there’s a whole load of people who neither expect, nor want, this.

The chain restaurants are there to cater for the people who want them, and the independent restaurants/ cafes/ coffee shops are there for the people who want more choice.

It’s coming across as UK bashing, because making generalizations about one group of people and applying it to an entire country is UK bashing.

I think it's wierd, our kids ate what we ate. At 3 we could take them to an Indian or Chinese restaurant and there were no kids meals! I think you're absolutely right to introduce your little one to a wide range of foods. I can't imagine feeding a 3 year old baby food from a jar 😳

@DogInATent yes, no other country has bland chain restaurants

Ds 10 loves calamari,mussels,prawns in fact all seafood.We got him to try them very young.

Perhaps people give their children what they can afford

@DogInATent this is such a load of crap. In my small town we have independently run Indian, Chinese, Italian, Greek, French, Spanish, Thai and British restaurants. Please tell us what the ‘same predictable’ menu is at all these places? And not a single chain restaurant, but yes of course all we want is a bland chain restaurant, clearly no demand for anything else 🙄.

The whole “oh you WONT like that darling”‘is just setting them up for failure 😂
Totally the opposite with me.

@Manypaws , the food pouches/jars are expensive compared to standard family food

I don’t understand it either. I detest kids menus- the food there is not something I’d consider food suitable to give my kid (I appreciate there are fussy eaters and that’s all they’d eat though). I’ve always ordered from the normal menu to them- grilled fish, grilled meats, vegetables, etc.

@Oppenjam In spite of your local area, there are a lot of chain restaurants in Britain. My local high street is full of them.