To be fed up of having to work Christmas because I don't have children

[boogiewoogie24]

I work in a 24/7 sector so christmas day is a normal working day.

This year we have a new manager and we've been told that apart from christmas day and boxing day, we have to work our normal shifts. Those 2 days, we have to work either christmas or boxing day

I work weds-sun one week and weds-fri the other, so never work Mon and Tues. I've been informed I'm working christmas eve, which is a Tuesday. Of the 3 people who normally work the Tuesday late shift, 2 have very young children so are being allowed to either finish early (normal finish time is 11pm) or just don't have to work. The other person has older kids so is happy to work as normal.
So I've been told I'm working the Tuesday until 11pm. I questioned why when I don't work Tuesdays. Response was "you don't have kids" yeah that'll be because I've had 3 miscarriages over 10 years of trying for a baby.
I'm one of only 3 people who work at my place who don't have children. The other 2 are only in their early 20s so plenty of time for them to have in future. I'm nearly 40.

I'm also having to work both christmas and boxing day because it's Jane's first christmas as a mum so she can have both days off and Jill's got her kids this year and last year they were at their dad's so she can have both days off, and Mary's family are in Scotland (we are south england) so she can have the 2 days off to visit them. No doubt Sue and Karen will go off sick like normal... you get the picture.

I'm rambling I know. But basically I'm being penalised for being unable to have children. It doesn't matter that I find christmas incredibly hard and painful.

Yep. I'd raise hell about that too.

I would report to HR

Festive period working needs to be done fairly regardless of what commitments people have, it’s simply unfair otherwise. If someone wants to swap then great but there should be no obligation to.

I live local to my family so I am working 23/24 this year (lunchtime finish on 24) to allow other colleagues to travel the long distances they need to in order to see their families. DC will go to the holiday club at their school and we will do something fun in the afternoon. However, if I wanted to travel at Christmas I would expect to be given my turn to take longer off rather than being discriminated again for having my family locally. It shouldn’t be a given.

I’m sorry for your miscarriages OP.

@getahhtmapub people don't own kids. Gross. Why do threads about this kind of issue always end up with ugly shit like this getting said. OP is YANBU but you are.

@SleepFinally : Humanity has become very selfish sadly
Also sleepfinally: My first Christmas with my baby was one of the most special days I will ever remember.

well it's a conversation and people are sharing their stories about how good employers behave.

Swings and roundabouts?

Hardly. The OP has disclosed that she has suffered miscarriages which is why she has no children.

She's not supposed to have to work Christmas and Boxing Day, but is being expected to work both.

Where OH works they have an eight week shift pattern. If your shift falls on Christmas Day you're at work. Last year we Christmas Dinner on Christmas Eve so he could enjoy it. This year he'll be going to work at 2.30 pm on Christmas Day. He's the only one on the shift pattern with children, but all the other men want to drink copious amounts of alcohol over the festive period. Nobody has ever offered to swap shifts with him and he wouldn't presume to ask. Occasionally, ( very occasionally) you don't have to work over the Christmas period at all, if the shift pattern falls right.

I used to work christmas eve and day as a student and we would always be paid double time. There were never any shortages of volunteers! I think Christmas working hours should be shared regardless of commitments. Everyone deserves a break.

Mmm, reads to me more like why the OP should not make a fuss and just work it.

YANBU, it should be equal treatment for everyone. I work in healthcare and knew from the start that working over Christmas would be expected. I do my share, same as everyone else, even though I now have kids. We can celebrate on a different day instead.

This sounds like workplace discrimination, frankly. Your manager is a tosser and is discriminating against you.

my husbands work has a brilliant policy, until your youngest child is in secondary school (ie 10-11 years old) you are allocated Christmas Eve, Christmas Day (which everyone gets off) and Boxing Day. However, if you have these days “off” you HAVE to work “on call” which is either “morning - midnight to 8am” or evening “4pm-midnight” which means you will take the calls from people and repair whatever bit of the internet that is broken.
Once your youngest child is in secondary school, it is expected you will work and cover the shifts for parents of younger children as the other parents have covered you.
I think this works really well, as his work is 100% remote, so people can still visit their families over Christmas, as long as someone is online 8-4 on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day and emergencies are taken care of by the people with families.
I don’t understand it beyond this because I don’t work there, but it seems like a good policy to have.

Then you need to have a good, hard look at all the things you have said, and how you have said them, @SleepFinally, and do a bit of reflection on how they have come over to other people. I completely agree with everyone who has said you are guilt-tripping people, and I think you need to see what you have done and acknowledge it.

Also, even in America, where 'freedom of speech' is codified in the Constitution, that freedom is not limitless - the classic example is that you are not 'free' to shout "FIRE!" in a crowded theatre (when there is no fire) because your freedom of speech does not take priority over the rights of the other theatre patrons to be safe, and shouting 'FIRE' may very well cause a panic in which people can be hurt.

Plus, asking you to word things more carefully is NOT impinging on your freedom of speech.

Completely agree with you. This happened to me a lot in my twenties. I'd work my fair share of Christmas shifts and if I ended up with Christmas eve or day off people with children would be asking me to swap and complaining it wasn't fair. I work in the care sector. It's crap but everyone deserves to have time off with their family.

bloke are you? read any of my other posts have you?
Reign yourself in, mate.

I have said in repeated posts that OP should get it in writing then blow the lid off it (in other words)

If I'd been employed with a similar firm, it would have meant not having Christmas off for my entire working life.

Ugh, this drives me mad - and I have been on both sides of the spectrum, before and after kids.

It should all be fairly done - and then if people are happy to swap, they can agree it between them.

That might sound reasonable, but what happens when you're always the person who's having to give up Christmas for others?

Someone could spend her entire working life not being able to see her family at that time - being penalised for not having children meaning that she can't celebrate with her spouse or her parents.

Sandra isn’t causing the new mother to miss Christmas with her baby, though, is she? The mother is, by choosing to work in a 24/7/365 job. Jobs aren’t designed to flex to the needs of the job holder. If you can’t meet the requirements for the job without someone else giving up something for you, then you can’t do the job properly. There are always options in life. If you want never to work Christmas, do what I did, and move to a job where you don’t have to.

What happens to those without children if those with children are prioritised until their children are 11 years old?

Woman, as it happens, although I don't see why that's pertinent. No thanks, I won't rein myself in. I don't see any posts here to the effect you mention.

That sounds like a one size fits all approach.
Issues that spring to mind - religious or other beliefs (do people who do not wish to celebrate yet have young children have to take the time off?), people with shared residency of children (if your children are not actually with you those 2 days do you still have to take the days?), step children (do they count as 'yours'?) other responsibilities, lone parents of older children?

Are you being serious? I ALWAYS hear people talking about wanting Christmas off because they have children, and asking childless people to cover for them. How do you think that is fair?

If you had a colleague with a new baby and his would be their first Christmas together, would you really feel happy having the day off and making them work? I'd feel terrible unless I also had a very very good reason to be off.

A colleague is not 'making' another colleague work. One has to assume they took the job knowing that working Xmas might come up.

They work 8-4.
Those with children cover “on call”