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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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6
fedup33 · 21/11/2024 08:32

If Captain had been some guy on an estate it wouldn't have gained traction.

Can you imagine it Jimmy from number 17 walks around the garden " for the NHS"

Rich get richer.

1dayatatime · 21/11/2024 08:33

Personally I think the Captain Tom saga is a perfect metaphor for the whole Covid response:

A very large number of ordinary well meaning but naive people do the decent thing (being following the rules, believe the government information etc) only to be taken advantage off by those that were already well off or knew that the rules were ineffective (for example Partygate or PPE scandals).

I genuinely think that this has left an undercurrent of resentment and anger in the UK.

Ivyn · 21/11/2024 08:36

Not surprised at all.

I remember wanting to vomit seeing her waving to the crowds at Wimbledon like she was royalty or something.

Captain Tom's daughter
lolly792 · 21/11/2024 08:37

The whole greedy story leaves me wondering whether Captain Tom genuinely was a harmless elderly man who was manipulated by his daughter or whether he was seeking publicity and all the trappings right from the get go. It's sad that we have to wonder about that - he's tainted by the whole scandal.

It certainly felt off to me, and sadly a lot of this type of thing is performative. People see an opportunity and jump at it, other people get suckered in and it goes crazy.

Might sound cynical but I suspect most high profile stunts aren't altruistic at heart. It's the people who quietly and consistently get on with fund raising/ volunteering/ helping others without needing to be in the limelight who are the real heroes

Ivyn · 21/11/2024 08:38

I suspect most high profile stunts aren't altruistic at heart. It's the people who quietly and consistently get on with fund raising/ volunteering/ helping others without needing to be in the limelight who are the real heroes

I agree.

1dayatatime · 21/11/2024 08:40

@VegTrug

"Lockdowns were not “designed” for that at all! 🤦🏼‍♀️🤣 Grow up! You sound like a teenage conspiracy theorist"

I agree lockdowns were not "designed " for that but the reality is that the level of fraud that took place was off the scale from bounce back loans to PPE contracts to eat out to help out.

So clearly whilst the design of the lockdown measures was not to make the rich richer the actual outcome was exactly this.

Parutte · 21/11/2024 08:41

He will never be thought of as that benevolent old man

A well placed friend told me that Captain Tom took out a super injunction against a newspaper. I thought he loved the limelight. He was a contestant on blankety blank. Surely you only willingly appear on tv if you like attention? His daughter got her brass neck from somewhere

randomflumpsy · 21/11/2024 08:42

Might sound cynical but I suspect most high profile stunts aren't altruistic at heart. It's the people who quietly and consistently get on with fund raising/ volunteering/ helping others without needing to be in the limelight who are the real heroes

I agree. Obviously we have no idea if Tom was in on it or not but its certainly possible, and the idea that is old so therefore he must have had innocent/pure motives is ludicrous.

It was sickening the way people were castigated and berated when they expressed concerns about it- so many hateful responses from others about how if you didnt donate or support them you were awful, cruel, un kind, hated the elderly etc

Mizzarde · 21/11/2024 08:44

LittleRedY0shi · 21/11/2024 08:01

On the money vs reputation thing, right now they still seem to be trying to have their cake and eat it!

"In a statement, the Ingram-Moores said they were treated "unfairly and unjustly" in the report.
They said the two-year inquiry has taken a "serious toll" on the family's health, "unfairly tarnishing" their name.
They described the process as "unjust and excessive" and that the charities watchdog had a "predetermined agenda"."

Yes, there's the slimy PR training coming out right there. DARVO in action.

Lots of fake indignation and vague negative insinuations about the findings of the charity watchdog... but without actually saying that the findings were wrong or that the family didn't misappropriate the money!

Yes, of course there was a "predetermined agenda." The agenda was to investigate and find out what happened. That's the watchdog's job! And they did it, and they found out the truth about the dishonest, thieving bastards. And strangely enough the dishonest, thieving bastards don't like it.

dottiedodah · 21/11/2024 08:47

Is there no redress then? If she has been dishonest, and has been using funds dishonestly. Is there not charges to face.this same week 2 former girl guide leaders had been jailed for misappropriation of funds for their guide group.

Bruisername · 21/11/2024 08:48

I think it will come down to whether they have crossed a legal line.

so with the book - was it just an impression that the money would go to charity or does it cross the threshold into fraud

so did Hannah and her husband take the whole lot? Or did it go to ‘family’?

Cattyisbatty · 21/11/2024 08:52

From what I understand the actual fundraiser - the walk - was leigitimate and all the money went to NHS charities which was great. I donated at the time.

It's everything else since then that has been dodgy and the family (not Tom I hope), knew exactly what they were doing. Greed begets greed.

BlackJacktheDog · 21/11/2024 08:53

1dayatatime · 21/11/2024 08:33

Personally I think the Captain Tom saga is a perfect metaphor for the whole Covid response:

A very large number of ordinary well meaning but naive people do the decent thing (being following the rules, believe the government information etc) only to be taken advantage off by those that were already well off or knew that the rules were ineffective (for example Partygate or PPE scandals).

I genuinely think that this has left an undercurrent of resentment and anger in the UK.

Totally agree with this.

I think it had a significant and damaging effect on the way people view the world, view politics, view charities and view each other.

Damn them all - the Thénardiers Ingram-Moores as much as any of them for grabbing fistfuls of cash at the expense of other people's welfare.

randomflumpsy · 21/11/2024 08:58

A very large number of ordinary well meaning but naive people do the decent thing

Yes, this is true, but lets not forget that many of those ordinary well meaning people came down hard on anyone who questioned the narrative and expressed doubts about the fund raising etc Those people were shouted down and told to shut up. This just shows that it's actually quite healthy and right to question events.

Wittow · 21/11/2024 08:59

Why isn't the scrounging scumbag being prosecuted?

Itscoldouthere · 21/11/2024 09:00

I had a direct email conversation with her at the time, I lived not far away and there was a just giving page set up to raise money to pay for his Birthday party, I came across it when trying to give money to his walk in the early days, I was worried it was a scam, so contacted her and she came back and said no it was genuine they had set it up.
I was thinking WTF why do you need to have a just giving page to pay for his birthday ? Surely that’s something the family should have just done (it was in Covid time) ?
it didn’t sit well with me so from then on felt she was driven by the money and publicity.

VegTrug · 21/11/2024 09:01

1dayatatime · 21/11/2024 08:40

@VegTrug

"Lockdowns were not “designed” for that at all! 🤦🏼‍♀️🤣 Grow up! You sound like a teenage conspiracy theorist"

I agree lockdowns were not "designed " for that but the reality is that the level of fraud that took place was off the scale from bounce back loans to PPE contracts to eat out to help out.

So clearly whilst the design of the lockdown measures was not to make the rich richer the actual outcome was exactly this.

But that’s not what PP said or at least, that’s not what I was replying, I was replying to the statement I quoted

TheHangingGardensOfBasildon · 21/11/2024 09:05

Bruisername · 21/11/2024 08:48

I think it will come down to whether they have crossed a legal line.

so with the book - was it just an impression that the money would go to charity or does it cross the threshold into fraud

so did Hannah and her husband take the whole lot? Or did it go to ‘family’?

Either way, I think it's rather obvious that the only real public interest in his story was because of the charity aspect.

He wasn't known on a national level before that. I loved my Grandads, but nobody was writing or buying a book of their lives.

Ivyn · 21/11/2024 09:05

They set up a Just Giving page for his birthday party?

That's obscene. They are extremely rich and can afford their own party hats and cake.

It just gets worse and worse.

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 21/11/2024 09:08

Bruisername · 21/11/2024 08:28

You can look at their accounts which should be online (if you can’t find or they haven’t filed then that’s a red flag)- Google the main people- look at reviews - consider small charities that are local where you can see how they are doing - charities linked to things you know

I've worked for small local charities, and you'd have no idea from the accounts what a shambles they were.

Also rife with big personalities, trustees drafted in as social favours, and absolutely terrible management of serious issues.

I had to step in as a junior member of staff to prevent or correct serious mismanagement many times (working PT for convenience during studies, but actually with far more experience than the leadership).

I wouldn't give a penny to a small charity, especially one dealing with any sort of serious issues.

eqpi4t2hbsnktd · 21/11/2024 09:11

Lots of charities are quite dodgy.... I had a friend who worked for Save the Children and it was known as "Save the Receipts"... because they expensed everything.

SassK · 21/11/2024 09:11

I didn't warm to any of the family, and I thought the Barbados trip and the other hospitality they all received was incredibly crass.
There's nothing about the warm 'in it together' examples we're fed about the covid period that I look back on fondly, from the weekly clapping to Tom Moore walking round his garden - every such example just makes me shudder; I hated the overreaching response/restrictions.

That said, there are far worse cases of financial advantage routinely taking place in the upper echelons of business/society in the UK. The press has been particularly savage with the Moore family - if the press make you they can break you I guess. I don't think there would've been anything unreasonable about Tom Moore using the money he was paid for the books deal to benefit his family, the issue was that he gave the impression in the books that charity was going to benefit.

Stressedafff · 21/11/2024 09:14

I thought it was a swizz from the start.
It was like a game of grifter bingo
Old person ✅
War veteran ✅
Charity ✅

Heylittlesongbird · 21/11/2024 09:14

Ivyn · 21/11/2024 08:36

Not surprised at all.

I remember wanting to vomit seeing her waving to the crowds at Wimbledon like she was royalty or something.

And Dame Sarah Gilbert was also there and given a standing ovation. She looked embarrassed and humbled by it. Meanwhile Hannah couldn’t jump up and wave quickly enough!

potatocakesinprogress · 21/11/2024 09:15

Cattyisbatty · 21/11/2024 08:52

From what I understand the actual fundraiser - the walk - was leigitimate and all the money went to NHS charities which was great. I donated at the time.

It's everything else since then that has been dodgy and the family (not Tom I hope), knew exactly what they were doing. Greed begets greed.

The man had voted against money for the NHS all his life, it was the least he could do.