To think H is a selfish p*ick?

[Incandescentwithrage]

H supports Liverpool. Who may well go through to the European Cup final to be played in Moscow. Last year he went to Eindhoven, Barcelona and Athens to watch them in the various legs of the competition. We had one family holiday to Spain.

He is now arranging to go to Moscow should they get through this year. This in spite of the fact that we are very short of money and we as a family will not be able to afford a holiday this year. His argument is that he cant afford to pay for us all to go on holiday but he might be able to afford this because it is just for him. I am absolutely furious and can hardly speak to him because I am so angry. He also says that this is a match that will never happen again and this is his justification.

Am I being unreasonable? Would welcome some tips on dealing with this. It is not just the holiday issue but we are struggling financially also. His selfishness is actually making me feel ill.

Sod him. Let him sulk - how would you respond if your dc's sulked? He is behaving like a spoilt child and needs to realise that he can not get his own way all the time. If you give in he will carry on as he always has, if he continues to act like a child then you need to treat him like one and children need boundaries. Effing off to Moscow should be plainly designated as crossing the line. If he continues with it tell him that you don't want a family holiday but the kids do and the only way he will get to go is if he takes the dc's with him. No negotiation.

Well done Incandescent. He is being a knob of the highest order. Do you live in or near Liverpool? Surely he can watch it at the pub or something? What an arse.

Congratulations, incandescent. The next tricky step will be to work out a way to ensure he thinks the decision to not go was his......

YANBU - DH is a huge arsenal fan and has a home season ticket - used to have an away one too but gave that up when we had DC2. Now he only goes to games that are not televised as it is such a hike and an enourmous pain in the arse - last match he went to abroad was Champions League and he would not have been bloody well going if we didn;t have a family holiay that year I can tell you.

I would put all his stuff in the iddle of the lounge and ask him what he wants to sell out of it to fund this little jaunt!

TWUNT of the highest order!

Mind you DH is off to Cambridge to visit his brother who is on an exchange at the university from Paris on Thursday even though his brother is coming down on the way home on Friday - I am not pleased but he will feel my wrath when I go to the Boden Sale next month and he gets his CC bill!

I like the line "I am not telling you what to do, I am telling you what I will do if you go on this trip"

Excellent - very assertive. I will remember that one.

He's actually got no chance (and not only because Chelsea are going to beat them tomorrow). If he hasn't got a ticket he can't get a visa, and because of teh visa situation ickets will only be available through the clubs, with priority to season ticket holders.

My dh is a fanatical Chelsea fan (2 season tickets). He is planning to go to moscow, but the crucial difference is that not only can we afford it, but he accepts the sacrifices I make to allow him the time to indulge his passion (every home game - which takes a whole day) and ensures that I have time to do things I want to do as well. Your dh is being a selfish tosser.

I am not sure why any woman would be interested in a bloke who likes football

If that were my dh, when he went to Moscow I'd change the farking locks !!

"If I get my bonus, I'm going and that's it" - yes. It's his money and therefore his choice. But it isn't.

I think you have just ensured the game tomorrow night has every vibe Mumsnet can muster going towards Chelsea! I'm going to be supporting them myself, so that Prufrock's exceptionally reasonable dh gets to go to Moscow and not your exceptionally unreasonable one!!

I had no idea Moscow was so expensive now. And the idea that he would go and hope to pick up a (ludicrously expensive) ticket outside the stadium .

He needs a reality check.

Incandescent, is he a scouser? I am and DH is too, he does sound like a typical scouse football fan - "I'm going the footy and there is feck all you can do to stop me" must be repeated X 25,000 every week!

Good on you incand.
Brilliant.
He knows the score now so you can just stay dangerously quiet and scare the crap out of him.

Get a ticket outside the stadium indeed!
Fuckwit.

Incand, your husband is living in cloud cuckoo land if he thinks that doing this trip would cost less than a family holiday! I have just checked flights, BA are quoting £890 (alhough they don't have flights on the exact days he'd need, so he would have to stay in Moscw for just a couple of nights longer. On top of that of course is the ticket & hotel. The cheapest I have found is a company quoting Euro 3395 for the two. Now, by my reckoning c. £3000 would get you a pretty good family holiday, home or abroad.

I asked my DH (mad Man U fan) last night if he planned to go to Moscow for the final. He laughed & said you must be joking -- would be impossible to get a ticket; too late for a visa (and he has travlled to Moscow a lot for work); and would be damn expensive. My DH would do just about anything to see his beloved team play (he has a season ticket even though we live 130 miles away from Manchester), but even he is realistic enough to know that going to the finals in Moscow is nigh on impossible.

Well he is still adamant that he will find away talking about a flight to Finland and then a train from there. Nutter. So all can do is hope that Liverpool lose tonight. TBH I am not really letting it bother me all that much. If he goes he just confirms that is something I need to get out of anyway. It will be the final straw in a long line of things. He is not from Liverpool by the way for those who asked. Just feel really really sad for my kids that their Dad is so selfish and wont end up being here any more because of it.

I don't know why they don't swap the venue of the final now tbh. It's ridiculous that two English teams and their thousands of supporters have to trail to Moscow probabaly on separate arranged flights to avoid any trouble.

Thinking of you today, when I woke up to the radio saying Man U are in the finals. Or was I dreaming? Please let it be a dream, so many women will suffer if it's true.

he is, undoubtedly, a wanker

poor you (and your kids)

I agree
If you can't afford it he shouldn't go
You say you can't afford a family holiday this year - this trip will cost him what? £1k all in I bet

You could rent a cottage for that

It's true Man U are in and the chelsea V liverpool match is tonight to decide who'll play them.

(oh and I love football and dh and I both have Arsenal season tickets - we would be going if Arsenal were in the final but we can afford it - if we couldn't we most certainly would not)

Incand - he does realise that he needs a visa to get into Russia doesn't he. And that Russian border guards are all ex-KGB? And it doesn't have the most liberal police system in the world? And that Russia's relationship with the West has become more strained recently? So if he dos somehow manage to sneak into Russia without a visa, (which he won't get without a ticket), he is liable to be caught and banged up in a very harsh prison?

Incandescent, you're a strong-willed star. Stay strong

Last I heard, visas are being given to anyone with a ticket for a "club-organised" trip - the visa will last 72 hours.

Dh may take a little time to understand his wankerish attitude.

and CD, you have my deepest sympathies.

Your wish may come true - 1-0 to Chelsea (and that comes from a Liverpool fan - but I feel your pain!)

Prufrock - if this dh goes to Russia sans visa and ends up banged up in a gulag - "my grief would be containable"

I've obviously got my matches confused, didn't Manchester United win something yesterday? Is that unrelated to this match?

Liverpool losing on aggregate apparently. Shame. In extra time.