To think H is a selfish p*ick?

[Incandescentwithrage]

H supports Liverpool. Who may well go through to the European Cup final to be played in Moscow. Last year he went to Eindhoven, Barcelona and Athens to watch them in the various legs of the competition. We had one family holiday to Spain.

He is now arranging to go to Moscow should they get through this year. This in spite of the fact that we are very short of money and we as a family will not be able to afford a holiday this year. His argument is that he cant afford to pay for us all to go on holiday but he might be able to afford this because it is just for him. I am absolutely furious and can hardly speak to him because I am so angry. He also says that this is a match that will never happen again and this is his justification.

Am I being unreasonable? Would welcome some tips on dealing with this. It is not just the holiday issue but we are struggling financially also. His selfishness is actually making me feel ill.

Don't you need an HIV test too if you're a UK resident? That will add another week or so onto his visa application.

I'd be incandescent too.

Didn't they win the European something or other a couple of years back? This match "will never happen again" sounds a bit rubbish to me.

In fact, just wikied it:

International
European Cup and UEFA Champions League[74]
Winners (5): 1977, 1978, 1981, 1984, 2005
Runners-up (2): 1985, 2007
UEFA Cup
Winners (3): 1973, 1976, 2001
UEFA Super Cup
Winners (3): 1977, 2001, 2005
Runners-up (2): 1978, 1984
UEFA Cup Winners' Cup
Runners-up (1): 1966
Intercontinental Cup and Club World Cup
Runners-up (3): 1981, 1984, 2005

Looks to me like there's loads of effing football and Liverpool features quite frequently. Call bullshit on it.

Oh dear, I had the EXACT argument with my DH last week - he too supports Liverpool, he too WASTED a shitload of money to go to Athens but HE WILL NOT be allowed to waste a shitload of money we don't have to go to Russia should Liverpool get through! They will probably get beat at Chelsea so you won't have to worry!

Yes, he is a selfish prick but aren't most football supporters when it comes to big games - they would sell their grannies to get there.

won't be a prob.

He is being a throughly selfish unreasonable bastard

Tell him not to bother getting a flight, you can kick up the backside so hard he will get there quicker that way.

YANBU.
Selfish prat.

I had to put my foot down big time last month regarding the football - it was costing DH £100 for 2 tickets per home game (he would take a mate, did the mate ever give him the money for the ticket - NO). So including pint etc it was costing around £250 a month just to go the football - meanwhile I was scrimping to get by. You have to put your foot down and if he does go and you have told him not to come back, you will have to stick to it.

throat lozenge Pan?

Your husband is being totally unreasonable imo.

It is outrageous that your husband values the chance to see Liverpool in the Champions' League final more than ensuring that he and his family spend a few days on a family holiday together (which in my opinion is priceless). What a stupid, stupid man (at least in this regard).

The chances are actually, that Liverpool won't make the final. I would usually prefer Liverpool to beat Chelsea, but in this case I will make an exception and really hope Liverpool lose this week.

Football aside, it seems to me that your husband need to get his priorities sorted out, as well as your finances. My guess is that if he goes to international matches he has a season ticket for Liverpool. That has got to be worth a few hundred quid. Fine if times are good, but when things are a bit tight, then surely it is one of the first things to go.

As children, my parents always took us on a holiday every year, regardless of what they could afford (no credit available then). One year we maybe went to a nice hotel in Spain; another year it might have been a caraven park on the south coast. We all loved every holiday. I remember once hearing my DF recount a conversation he had with another father where this man proudly proclaimed that he had not taken a holiday in 20 years. My father just said to him "your poor kids".

Liverpool will always be in some European final or another -- that's what they do. Your DC need to spend time away with the two of you.

Good luck (but not to Liverpool)! xxx

PS yes, your husband is an utter selfish prick.

Find his passport. Then hide it.

I really don't understand why you would want to be with a man who would even consider this. Following sports teams around the world is a privilege of the single and rich. He's neither.

Fucking selfish prick. Dump him. He won't change - people that selfish never do.

Selfish tosser. There is no way that you wouldn't be able to manage some kind of a break as a family for the cost of this jaunt. Unfortunately the issue is deeper than a weekend away, if he can't see WRONG he is, it's hard to see a happy future.

My brother is a Liverpool fan. He earns a fairly good whack but, like many of us, is feeling the pinch at the moment with high prices and so on. And there is no way he would prioritise a trip to Moscow over a holiday with his kids. If it even crossed his mind, my SIL would go bananas.

I suspect in his head he is rationalising this because it's "his" money, i.e. he earnt it. However, the reality is that he was only able to earn it because you are providing the childcare which is equally his responsibility.

I also refuse to believe that his trip to Moscow, added up, will cost less than a family break in the UK. He just wants to go and doesn't give a monkeys about the financial - and other - consequences.

He's a bounder of the first water.

Kick the fecker to the kerb.

Here's hoping Liverpool get hammered by Chelsea tomorrow so the fecker a) does not go to the match and b) is upset.

Seriously, Moscow is SO EXPENSIVE, I work for an airline and we fly our crew home as business class passengers rather than have them stay 1 night in Moscow because the cost of accomodation, food, drink, travel, visas is so extortionate. As other posters have said, if you add up the cost of everything, I guarantee that it will be cheaper for you all to go to spain as a family.

Are you any further with this IWR ?

Yes when I got home this morning he had been on the phone trying to organize it so I told him point blank that if he goes the locks will be changed and he will not be living here any more. His response was "No one f*cking tells me what to do and if I get my bonus I am going and that it". Now sulking and giving me the silent treatment. I said "I am not telling YOU what to do. I am telling you what I will do if you go on this trip". I said if you have £500 to spare then you should be spending it on your kids and family. He doesn't answer when I say that. He is absolutely furious. I told him that he has a very short memory and that it is true that people never remember all the times you did stuff for them, they only remember the times that you DON'T do something for them. I have actually always been very supportive of his little jaunts in the past because we always had plenty of money to pay for them but our financial situation is the total opposite now - we really struggling. I know I am going to pay for this though. He can sulk for Britain when he wants to. I don t care though. If he goes then he doesn't come back here and thats it.

Good for you.

Well done!

Well done. Sounds like you have said it as you mean it and hopefully that will give him some food for thought.

Don't back down now.

He had to have applied for the tickets by last Wednesday though, and once you've won the tickets you can't sell them on because of the visa, so he won't be able to get his money back should Liverpool not qualify. Also, Moscow is seriously expensive and so are the flights.

Lollipopmother, he said he will get a ticket outside the ground, they are always available apparently - recipe for disaster if ever I heard one and even if he doesn't just being in Moscow will be enough.

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