Tell us why your male partner is lovely

[Brefugee]

prompted by claims that MN is a viper's nest of misandry...

My DH is lovely. He took 18 months parental leave when our DC were small and has never ever shirked being a parent.

he has lots of other good points, but i thought I'd start the ball rolling

(he does tend to open a drawer to get something out, but then leave it open. We Have Words about this every week)

Mine always gets up 10 minutes before me to make my breakfast for me to come down to, if he can’t, he leaves everything out for me to make my life a little easier. He is great round the house and is just generally amazing and supportive ☺️ married for 10 years!

My DH is a gorgeous man. He does more than half the housework and kids stuff as I am chronically ill. And works long hours.
He is brilliant at navigating the teen years, he's funny, lovely and squishy. He doesn't mind that I go out lots. We've had 25 years of ups and downs as life tends to be but he is always supportive.

He supported me financially so I could pursue my dream career for several years while I earned nothing and did the same again to allow me to be a stay at home mum for two years. He does the 40 minute school run twice a day without complaint even though dad could get the train, he does all the laundry and food shopping, he takes DM out shopping or drives her where she needs to go even though she can be very tricky. He cooks a fabulous roast every Sunday. He's a great dad and always has been. He even gave up work for a few years to be hands on stay at home parent to DD when she was young so I could pursue my very full on career. He frequently does things that inconvenience his life like wait around in London for Dd for hours while she's with a friend because she hates getting the train home alone in the dark.

He's pretty damn perfect but I definitely think I deserve him after a succession of serial cheaters and one very violent partner.

He was a rock in covid when dd's mh collapsed and she nearly dragged me under too.
Now I am having to go away regularly to help my elderly parents he is being a rock at home again.
In between we have fun together.
Married over 25 years, have been through bereavement, infertility, adoption, serious illnesses together.

he is a very good father….i used to chuck the kids at him at 6pm when he got home. He still very supportive of them as adults and will do anything for them

he is funny, still fancies the pants off me. I get the best slice of cake or pie or fried eggs etc

He is the breadwinner, works very hard for me and the children, now the children are adults i work part time and keep all my money and still use his

he more than pulls his weight in housework (bearing in mind that i was a sahm with very part time jobs til 2023 😀) i have never cleaned a toilet, he fills the car with petrol, does the bins and dishwasher etc

gives me lifts all the time, also did masses of lifts for the children with their after school clubs

there are loads more 🤔

My DH has hugged our feverish 3yo DS through the night two nights in a row, waking up with him and giving him Calpol - leaving me to sleep. DH says he sleeps just fine next to our DS in his room and enjoys their sleeping time together. They both had a long lie in this morning, again leaving me to have whatever lie in I wanted (I'm a naturally earlier riser) and get coffee and breakfast at my own pace. Now he is making breakfast for the both of them while I'm still just relaxing.

He makes me feel very loved. He makes the tea in bed on Sundays and is generous with his time for me.
He also supports my career and never belittles it

Lots of reasons but he also sits down to wee. Billy bonus

DH is awesome.

He does all the ironing. Does a good 45-50% of all household tasks. He always puts me first, is great with dd even though she isn't his.

He lost his son in Feb this year and he amazes me everyday dealing with his grief.

Dh slept on the floor for a year when ds1 was born so i could sleep with the baby 😀

If he goes to bed before me he lies on my side of the bed to warm it up for me, then rolls over to his own (cold) side of the bed when I get in.

Also, he hypes up my professional achievements to anyone who'll listen, and freely admits that my job is harder than his (which it is tbf!)

DH is my biggest cheerleader and he balances me. We're a team and I'd be lost without him. He's loyal, honest and accepts responsibility for any mistakes. He communicates with me and acknowledges my feelings (even when I'm being completely irrational). He's in recovery and his dedication and commitment to being the best version of him blows me away. He's an amazing dad and always makes time for our family. He's not embarrassed or ashamed to be who he is. When he proposed he told me 'I came from nothing, I have nothing but I'll work everyday to give you a little more than we had yesterday'.

Lovely thread @Brefugee

Just pointing out the irony 👍

My DH is so good with kids, better then I am. Even when they were babies he was such a pro at changing diapers because they always started smiling to him and lay still. He does all the docters appointments, dentist etc because he’s so good at making the kids feel at ease.
We both work 4 days at split everything. So he can be with the kids as much as i do.

I would say if I had stayed with my ex it might have been an easier relationship (at first) but ultimately not as happy or successful as what I now have with DH. He has higher standards then me and that's really been the push I needed.

I'm ND, tend to laziness and being a homebody. Without him I don't think I would have started my business (or had the financial security to do so). We wouldn't own property or be nearly as well off as we are. (He bought a house in his 20s which has gone up in value and that one sensible decision has made everything easier.

He acts slightly insulted whenever I tell/ask if I can go out because he knows I know he is happy and willing to do the kids after-school routine.

I did all night times when the kids were babies (breastfed and slept separately so he could function at work) but I always came down to a clean kitchen, stocked nappy table.

We are both usually tired after kids in bed and so don't do much adult conversations but he sends me texts. Maybe 3-4 times a year, gushing about how happy he is, how proud he is if me, how great our children are.

Do call the police.

Did you mean to quote me?

ETA- aah, I get it. I think you meant the OP! 😆

BUT my sisters both have wonderful husbands and having them in my children's lives has helped them understand what a dad should be like, and just been a wonderful source of unconditional love for them

He is encouraging and never controlling

My DH has a generosity of spirit

No game playing

He's just decent, kind and loving to the core

Thanks for this lovely thread @Brefugee (my fellow Archers fan!). The above qualities are what I think women (and men for that matter) would do well to look for in a spouse.

He's calm and patient and in the 30 years i have known him he has only properly lost his temper about 3 times. Our children have never gone to bed in tears because "dad has lost his shit again" which is how i was raised. He goes to gigs with our DD and football with DS. He is the dad I wish I'd had.

My DH is a fantastic step dad, works hard, works hours in the garden, puts the bins out every week (I would forget), empties and fills dishwasher and makes occasional meals. He is affectionate, open, has emotional intelligence and will discuss any problems (we don’t always see eye to eye however we can always talk things through and come to an agreement or solution).

Mines not perfect but he has all the good bits.

Better parent than I am
Kindest and most generous person I know
Taught me to be a better person
Brings me coffee most mornings
Gets up feeds the dogs most mornings to allow me to lounge in bed drinking coffee.

I had just started a new job when my mum became seriously ill. It would have been really difficult for me to take lots of time off at that point. My husband immediately offered to take holidays from work to be there for mum initially. It took a huge weight off my mind.
When mum eventually died, he sorted out spare room so my younger sister could move in with us instead of her rattling around alone in mum's house. I hadn't even asked. He just did it.
He is really thoughtful with gifts too. Remembers little things I've mentioned. He is much better at buying gifts than I am!

My husband is amazing. He is a great dad to our girls and misses them a lot at work, rushes home to be with us and wants to do all he can to help around the house. He's a great cook and loves doing it. We share lots of hobbies and interests. He always supports my decisions and has a very calming influence on me (I'm an anxious highly strung kind of person). He never has expectations when he gets home (dinner on the table etc) and is happier if we spend the day out doing fun/educational things rather than me cleaning and cooking so the house looks nice. He's wonderful in bed as well 😅 He makes me feel safe and taken care of.