12 year old forgot homework, aibu to want to drop it into the school?

[Trumped]

Will she ever learn then? 🙈

We do an emergency drop off once a term max. It’s really hard and dh is far nicer than me.

If it's a one off and you're not going out of your way then no problem
If it's expected then no i wouldn't

I wouldn't

I would if i could unless it’s a weekly occurrence

I’ve done it once for my 12 year old. I made sure she knew how annoyed I was and it hasn’t happened again.

If it's a rare thing, then I'd do it. If every other week, then no, natural consequences will help her more.

Depends what she forgot, will she get in trouble for not handing it in.

i wouldn't. it happens and it's not the end of the world. guess they are year 8? stop babying them.

Take photos of the homework on your phone and email them to the teacher

I would for my DC as they work hard, it would be a genuine oversight and they would appreciate the effort.

For someone who took it for granted and rudely demanded it - no.

One of my DC has dyspraxia and disorganization can be a part of that so they had to come up with ways of making sure they had what they needed for school and did their homework on time. Some children may need help coming up with systems to keep them organized. In those cases punishing them for being, well, them is pointless.

I would if not a huge inconvenience and if it didn’t happen often. If they were always forgetting homework I would warn them I wasn’t going to be bringing in in future and then stop doing so.

As a one-off, if she's generally a good kid then, then of course drop it off.

If this is a regular occurrence and she has history for being disorganised/bit caring enough to remember, then no.

Each half term mine get one ‘free pass’ and I will drop off homework/pe kit that they’ve forgotten. After that it’s tough and they take the consequences of not organising themselves properly.

If it is a rare event then I would for sure. My DS has autism and is a bit disorganised but if he forgot to bring his homework in it would send him over the edge. I think I do it about once a term or so. I know he is trying and human error hits all of us every now and then.

I dropped off PE kit once and made a huge fuss over it and made it clear that next time he would have to wear the awful stuff in the school’s spares box.

That seemed to work.

My son's calculator fell out of his bag and I knew he would get a negative mark for not having it. I have just dropped it off 😳

One of my DC (with dyslexia and related disorganisation issues) would quite often want me to bring in forgotten items. I would do so when convenient (often meant waiting until lunch time). Her teachers all knew about the extra challenge she faced, and were quite good about accepting that homework was done, and suspending sanction if it really did appear via hand of Mum during the day.

Yes, she grew out of it - or rather she learned, over time, coping and checking techniques that meant the oversights became rare and then even rarer.

I don't think a more punitive regime would have helped her. She was well aware of the disruption it caused, and grateful that I did help her whenever I could. And learned. It just took rather longer than you might otherwise have expected.

It depends... DSes have forgotten lunch/PE kit on occasions, and I normally do go and get it.

They don't mean to do it, it's not really carelessness as a habit, just a momentary blip that we all have sometimes, and they are grateful when I do it. I'd prefer them to know that I have their back, and I understand that we're all human, than have them get in trouble/get hungry for want of an hour out of my day (and petrol).

My DC are dyslexic so organisation can be a challenge. I have done the odd drop off of stuff if I’m working from home. I have also photographed forgotten homework and emailed it to the teacher so they could see it had been done.

I have done it plenty of times for my 2, sometimes by request and sometimes when I have noticed. I generally have a once per half term rule though.
I work very flexibly from home and school is a 5 minute walk away so I don't mind.

Actually, emailing to the teacher is a good idea.

Yes, would and have. They are good kids and wouldn't do it on purpose. I've forgotten things plenty of times and had dh drop them off. Just busy life. I do think it is part of our role as parents to make sure bags are packed, equipment etc and homework done. Not necessarily doing it for them but quick look, asking, checklist etc age dependent.

DDs primary school asked parents in yr 6 to not do this sort of thing for their kids - that it was time they all (SEN excepted, obv) learned to take responsibility or else took the (mild) consequences before they went to secondary.

'Dropping off' forgotten items makes work for the staff. So probably best not for anything that won't have serious consequences (eg lunch if there's no suitable alternative food).

I drop off here, it only happens a couple of times a year, is a genuine mistake and I use it as a 'treat them as you would like to be treated.'

To add, our (secondary) school are happy to receive, but they just keep it at the office and it's on the DC to go and collect it, they don't come looking for you.