To feel absolutely pathetic that I can't manage full time work

[Gerrymandering1]

I increased my hours at work to 32 a few months ago (so not even full time) from 3 days. I feel as though I'm not coping with things since I did this.

Our youngest has ASD and requires extra care and support compared to a usual 9 Yr old. The eldest seems to be going off the rails now. Husband has chronic kidney disease and is so tired constantly. I've been needing him to do more with me not being here and feel awful.

Maybe a wfh job would work but this job is constantly out of the house all day.

We could manage financially, u just feel I should be able to cope with these hours.

You are very unreasonable. You are caring for two children and a sick husband - that sounds like AT LEAST a half time job! That means you have time for maybe a half time job on top. I appreciate that there might be an element needing some money, but cut down to what you need financially. And don't feel guilty unless you've dishonestly forgotten to tell us you have several superpowers....

https://self-compassion.org/self-compassion-practices/#self-compassion-exercises

Can I recomend thinking about self compassion. This has really helped me too: when things get tough I'm no longer telling myself off.

I can't handle any work at all! Please don't feel bad. You should do what you can to make you happy and comfortable. I hope you're on all the benefits you're entitled to?
Everything you do to either make money, further your life, help others, or just occupy time is a positive. And taking time to care for yourself as well is really important.

I was replying to the poster who said she didn't know of anyone doing more than 30 hours. Like I said, at those dc ages most people I know are. Obviously if circumstances make this difficult then they can't. In OPs case, it sounds as though circumstances are indeed difficult and she's made the best decision for her in going back to 3 days.

I think in our year group I knew of one person who worked full time! There could have been a couple of others but we all knew each other mostly and although most worked in some capacity unless they had younger children it really was uncommon for anyone to work ft.

But I imagine its area and demographic too. A private school with good wrap around care probably has more parents who both work full time.

You are doing amazingly, juggling all that.
Go back to 30 hours.