To be annoyed at 'hope you had a great 1/2 term'

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Like most full time working parents I work most of the school holidays.
I've done it for years. I am also a lone parent. I have struggled with it. It is how it is and I get on with it.

Book club - 6 women. 3 work full or nearly full time, 2 work term-time, 1 home educating.
Every sodding school holiday we get a "phew...made it to the end of half term/term...can't wait for some time off" from one of the term-term workers.

My sister who KNOWS my situation was "Oh lucky you getting 2 weeks for 1/2 term".

I've had 2 emails from school today saying they hope I had a lovely 1/2 term.

Actually, I had one day off which was nice. The rest of it was just more juggling than usual, so nothing lovely really.

Were one of your group say she had enjoyed her skiing holiday, for example, would you also be upset? People lives different lives, there may be aspects of your life that upsets others.

I think are just making pleasant conversatoion. I don't think you should take it literally or to heart.

😬

how does a whatsapp book club work OP?

When the person on the checkout at Tesco says Enjoy your day, I never know what to say, if I say Thanks, enjoy yours too, it sounds wrong because she'll be sitting at the till for a long time. (Yes, I know it might be an 'he' but it's usually a 'she')

But you do ask people who worked over a holiday did they have a good one. You didn’t work every single day and so probably did something nice or different your day/ days off. I’ve worked 3/4 Christmases (retail not Christmas Day) and tell everyone what I did at Christmas

Morning rush/school runs feel like climbing a mountain at times so its understandable the relief that comes at the end of the half/full term.

Going to work without the added stress of that for a week feels good

No ones out to upset you or make you angry. People just want to savour the good bits where they can before it all starts again when the holiday week is over for the kids.

It wasn’t full pay and it also came with the constant threat of redundancy as you weren’t essential enough to be in the workplace, home schooling and the same level of general terror as the rest of the county 🙃

I say the same. But I do hope it's a enjoyable working day for them and they don't have to deal with miserable angry customers.

No it doesn't, I'm part time i get something like 128 hours, which is not 10 days. And if she's part time why is half term so unmanageable

there is a legal minimum for full time 😕 i believe 22

Its small talk dont overthink it

More awareness? I think it’s fairly obvious that people don’t just work term time….

Maybe you should figure out a bette elide balance if it annoys you so much

I say things like 'Hope you've had a good week' on a Thursday or Friday. I know people have been in work. You can still have a good week at work.

I got to page 3 and can’t read anymore and I refuse to vote. OP please don’t beat yourself up. Yes clearly you are tired and wish you could have had the half term holiday you think most of the other parents in your kids’ school had (spoiler alert: most probably didn’t) and a break from all the “stuff” you have to deal with in your life. You know deep down it’s not reasonable to expect the whole world to forego a pleasant, harmless greeting to take account of every other circumstance that might make that greeting just a tiny bit off the mark.

I hope you soon get that break you need so badly and can say with a big broad grin “my holiday was great thanks, how was yours?”

OP I'm with you. I'm sure you do save some holiday to be worth the kids bit it's impossible to cover it all as a single parent. And when you can't you feel even worse about dumping them in childcare when most kids are chilling at home. I totally get it.

Same for me! I wfh full time and didn't have any annual leave to take as I want 2 weeks off for Christmas. It was hard as I was working BUT I didn't have to rush and get DS ready for school etc.

You’re totally unreasonable. Even the break from having to make daily packed lunches or wash uniform is welcome.

I only took one day off in half term and we had a really nice time on a family day out . We also did nice stuff at the weekend at either end as homework was more staggered than usual. So yes, you can have a nice half term without having a whole week off.

Yep, most people I know who were furloughed were then made redundant in 2021 (tech sector, could easily have wfh if there had been enough work to do).

And furlough pay was in no way covering their previous wages either.

But you get to book holidays whenever you like. I'd swap with you in an instant.

Not everyone can do that though. I'm lucky I generally can, where my friend works, they are allowed 2 weeks in the summer and one or two of the other school holiday. Not a lot really.

You’re taking offence by someone saying ‘hope you had a great half term’ they’re not saying hope you had a great week / two weeks off. It’s like saying… hope you had a good weekend…or hope you had a happy birthday… some people work it, some people don’t. I don’t get what’s there to get so worked up about.

It’s a cheerful pleasantry, not meant to be taken absolutely literally. It’s the equivalent to if you were writing an email to the teacher and started off the email with “Dear X, I hope you are well” or “Dear X, I hope you are having a good evening”. It’s generally a more charming way of starting an email than just diving straight into the topic of intent. It’s meant to start the tone off as friendly.

Don't listen to the posters telling you to fire back a retort about how you didn’t actually have a good half-term and for the teacher not to assume and be more sensitive in the future. That would just come across as churlish and obnoxious and a good way to stop people ever having pleasant exchanges or friendships with you.

Imagine a teacher writing back to an email that you start of saying you hoped they were having a good evening and they fired back: “Actually I’m not having a good evening. Please don’t presume my evening is free and enjoyable. I’m actually marking and lesson planning (unpaid) for your child I have to teach tomorrow so don’t assume my evening is good. Please be more sensitive in the future”. See? Just obnoxious. People don’t write stuff like that to each other because they recognise it’s a normal social convention.

The teacher has no idea that you resentfully worked over half-term and that might not necessarily negate you having a good term anyway. The autumn half-term is full of seasonal events. Maybe you still enjoyed seeing your kids more, having a change in routine, not having to do the school run etc. Most of the time the “you” in “hope you had a nice term” is a general you and directed at your whole family rather than you personally. When I say to the cashier “hope you have a lovely day!” even though I know they probably have to work the remainder of the day, I’m saying and wishing it it regardless of this fact. It’s just a common nicety with the sentiment to wish well on the person.

No, I work full time.

Someone suggested I could take AL during 1/2 terms, then I would be happier.
I said that I prefer to take a 2 week break over the summer. This does not then leave me enough leave to take a few days every other school holiday.

I can't 'just take a couple of days' every school holiday.