To be sick of this, think it is utter bollocks and the next generation are actually bang on?

[Usunshine]

I’m in a professional role. Historically this career (like many others) is stay late, keep working, do absolutely everything you can for your job. I had a conversation with my manager in a 1:1 review meeting where he said I was doing fine, couple of bits to work on but all good and happy with performance etc. A normal review meeting really.

He then proceeded to say next I want to really mount the pressure, I want you to be feeling you have too much work and have to say to me ‘(Eric), I can’t take this on, it’s too much.’ I want you to almost feel like there’s so much on that you are non stop. That will mean next year we can talk about more money. It will mean late nights of course. We want to keep building more and more.

I have worked hard in my life. I’m late 30s and I’ve actually done the whole putting your life on hold to pass professional exams, worked late and weekends. I’ve done all that. I watch younger versions of me clocking off at bang on 5:30 and be called snowflakes by older members of the team. But I think good for them. For fucks sake why am I being told I have to have so much pressure I can’t manage the workload?! Why is that necessary? In my opinion the younger generation has it right. It’s not lazy logging off at half 5 to play tennis or go for a drink. It’s sensible. There’s no prizes for working yourself to the bone. Interested in others thoughts on this as I had a completely different view a few years ago.

Totally fair to flip the bird at Eric - he sounds excruciating.

on the other side I know very few people for whom knocking off at 5:30 every day and prioritising their tennis has lead to huge financial success. Many of my circle are on 250k + household annual incomes and none of them work 9-5 x 5 days a week.

all of them have at least one half of the couple who works 60+ hours a week and expects to be available at wierd times of day for calls / meetings.

now I’m not advocating that it’s necessarily healthy to work that much. Or that everyone who works that much will make big money - but there is a correlation!

I was a secondary school middle manager. I used to tell my NQTs not to make my mistake - don't give your whole life to to your school.

Eric is an idiot. He would be getting my resignation at the start of the new year.

This was my life too in accountancy, so I left for the civil service. Life is too short.

'No thanks Eric. Not unless you want to pay me the extra money now? Now will that be all, because I'm clocking off at 5.30 because that's when you pay me until, and have things to do before then'.

I’ve always put in extra hours in previous jobs and in my own business. My husband is the same. But it benefits nobody; just makes you ill and tired so I’m with the younger generation on this!

Start looking for another job now. Even if you did all that he'll have some reason next year why you need to do another year before he pays you more. It's gaslighting. There are decent bosses around. Find one.

When I have these staff appraisals I always rate myself 10/10 and then challenge my manager to prove otherwise. If they can then I know there is something to work on. If not, they can suck it.

You are right. There's just no point in employers acting like this. Work doesn't need to be awful.
I have a job I love at the moment and it's the first time I've ever worked anywhere where there's such a supportive team.
And honestly I love every one of them and would never want to let any of them down. Because they are all lovely and I feel so valued and respected.
It's been such an eye opener regarding jobs I worked previously where the stress was incredible and I felt like the managers were terrifying.
I think we've got to a point in time now where we can rightly ask what on earth is the point of a workplace culture like that?
We can understand that if we hit and bully our kids it's terrible parenting..
Why can't we understand that bullying and terrorusing staff is terrible management??
Get people genuinely engaged, treat them with respect, acknowledge they have lives outside of work that are important to them.. all work together and have each other's backs

He then proceeded to say next I want to really mount the pressure, I want you to be feeling you have too much work and have to say to me ‘(Eric), I can’t take this on, it’s too much.’ I want you to almost feel like there’s so much on that you are non stop. That will mean next year we can talk about more money. It will mean late nights of course

😂😂😂😂😂🥕😂😂😂😂

seriously

id still be laughing.

meeting with HR.

who the actual fuck does he think he is...

id be relentless until he was fired.

Eric's a prick, who's sailing perilously close to ending up being taken to a tribunal for causing burnout or mental health issues in his team. If he reflects the culture of the firm in general, rather than just being up his own arse, I'd be looking for an exit strategy at this point. Or you could enjoy the next year pushing back against his silly expectations and enjoying his bemusement.

I have recently lowered the amount of time I spend worrying about work or feeling pressured about work commensurate with my salary.

I have been much more content since I decided that am I no longer going to sacrifice my personal time, wellbeing or mental health for work.

My first job was like this. My contract said 9-5.30 and that I could take one day per week as study leave for professional exams. Not only did I not get my study leave, I got hauled into the boss’s office because I was seen leaving the office at 6.30pm (to got to an Italian lesson I’d signed up to). Apparently it wasn’t the done thing. I stuck it out for 2.5 years and then left (the job and the country). This was back in 2000.

So Eric wants you to work longer hours for no extra pay, with the carrot of - maybe - more money in future.
Thanks, twatty Eric, but I think we'll pass on that kind offer and focus on a decent work/life balance. And start looking for something else.

Is it the kind of job where extra money means being invited to become a partner?

I'd be continuing as you are, unless working longer hours meant immediately more pay for every overtime hour.

Do you want to be more senior and have more hours, responsibility and more pay?

I don't know anyone who works only 9 to 5 and who makes mega bucks. A decent average wage is usual for working 9 - 5. Which is fair.

People who make huge money usually work long hours, have more responsibility or education, expertise and experience. That is fair too.

I have worked for over 30 years and I have learned some facts that I wish I knew or understood earlier

If your working environment involves long hours or ridiculous deadlines then your mangers and senior team haven't a clue what they are doing. They don't know how to define roles, set work or employ the adequate skilled staff. They should not be in their roles

If you work really hard and behave like the 'perfect' employee it doesn't mean you will get that promotion or that pay raise plus you may not end up with the respect you deserve which always seem to go to the dick at meetings who talks like he knows ever thing but actually never delivers anything

Most people at work (even the ones that sound nice) are out to advance and promote themselves . Work relationships are transactional relationships. So be clever they certainly are being ....Don't let anyone use you (as some will) and make sure you set strong boundaries because in the end they will be rid of you as fast as they can say 'young blood' if it suits them to do so

Organisations that talk a lot about life work balance are usually the ones with the worst problems. Always say the right things to HR or your managers but always remember you are contracted to work a certain number of hours a week , you don't need to do more

Anyone who speaks to you like Eric should be reported to HR or at the very least put straight . Overtime is necessary on very rare occasions and should not be the norm. Do not be swayed by the office culture ...what is the worst they can do ?

I have been praised and gaslighted, promoted and ignored, I have had pay raises or earned less that I deserved, I have worked under hierarchy and I have had autonomy, I have been insanely busy or rooted around for something to do. I have been respected and I have been micro managed. I have worked for fools and wise hacks. And I can say that working long hours or very hard has not been the deciding factor on how much I have been paid or on how I got on in my job

I was doing 60 plus hours as a teacher then spending loads of my holiday time in school - even decorating on more than one occasion which included spending my own money on materials. For what money?? Because I worked in an area with lots of issues/school with financial difficulty.

Why? What kind of an utter mug was I? My children all taught me that there was absolutely no reward for being a mug, spending your own money and having absolutely no life. It's not a vocation, it's a job.

Don’t suppose you work in big 4? Sounds like the kind of “motivational” nonsense I hear from my team leaders.

i also worked hard in my youth but I agree the young folk have got the right idea.

Partner profit share inflation is so far in excess of staff wage inflation it’s a joke. There’s too many old partners taking home the big bucks but not pulling their weight, and not enough hard working, talented young partners being brought through.

The bonuses (at all grades) are pitiful and not worth the effort.

My DH works in the same field as me but in house. He works less hours, fully remote, takes home more pay, and gets a 20% bonus just for turning up.

Ask Eric for all that in writing. What a low grade manipulator! 😂

It depends on the industry. If it’s some kind of job where an 8-figure deal might fall through if you don’t get on the phone or physically go hold the client’s hand through some issue: that’s the business you signed up for. Or if it’s medical where lives might literally be on the line.

If we are talking about data entry, though, that’s different. That’ll keep until the next day.

Employer loyalty doesn't exist anymore. It's a sad state of affairs but most references are just x worked here from x to x. No one gives a shit if you worked extra hours. No point being nice.

Stuff that.

What is the point of having all that money if you never get to relax or see your family properly because you're too busy working? Genuine question, I'm curious about why people work this way when it's not just for survival.

My ExH made huge amounts of money.

He regularly went to the gym in the afternoons to sit in the jacuzzi and sauna "meetings" and had regular lunches out.

After his first three years when he was on a call rota he didn't do any unsocial hours.

Computer programmer in finance.

They didn't employ him to do long hours they employed him to solve problems no-one else could.

In most jobs, as others have said, those who earn well, work excessive hours. It doesn’t mean that you need to also. Just tell Eric that you’re currently prioritising your work life balance being more balanced towards life than work. As people say, on their death bed no-one wishes they’d worked longer hours.