To think saving half of all incoming money isn’t excessive?

[KeenOchreUser]

I was chatting with some friends about money recently (note to self: never again), and mentioned that I try to save half of everything I earn or receive, whether it’s my salary, bonuses, or monetary gifts. One friend said this was excessive and hinted that it might reflect some deeper issues with money!

I was so taken aback that I didn’t even know how to respond. To me, this seems like a responsible approach. AIBU to think my friend’s reaction was actually the over the top one here?

I'm the same as you, I save alot as I can for the first time ever really and it's gives me options and peace of mind. I think the trick is not to discuss it with people and just do your own thing.

Op most pro are mindful of whee money goes.
I think enjoy in life is really imp so if you can afford cake and coffee but it's making you stressed out to buy it, there Is a problem.

Set aside spefic money for socialising

We have pensions and I try to save the majority of my salary and live off DH's. We've had a bit of an expensive year of adhoc work/essentials having to be replaced but I put the money aside as soon as it comes in so that it isn't wasted per se.

You sound very level-headed tbh. I am somewhere north of 60, and didn’t start saving until COVID.
When I retire, I won’t have a decent pension, so am looking to create different income streams to supplement the State Pension.
This will probably mean that I won’t be able to retire fully and enjoy life as much as you (hopefully) will.
Don’t listen to the Nay-Sayers - you are being extremely sensible!

It's not excessive if you can afford it and it doesn't mean you have no quality of life now.

Half of our household income would be all of our disposable income - the kept half would cover the absolute bare bones of living, just needs and essentials.

We COULD do it. But Christ it would be miserable.

No one is 'unreasonable' for saving ANY amount of money, it's your choice. But if you had to live like a pauper whilst putting half your income away (long term) then i'd think you were crazy and that yes, there were probably deeper 'issues' going on.

If you're saving half your income AND enjoying life then I can't see any possible problem and anyone that did is probably just jealous imo.

Really good for you! I only discovered the world of personal finance such as ISA's and SIPP's in my late 40's and wish I'd been able to save / invest earlier. I bore my teenagers with info about their junior SIPP's now. Personal finance education is dreadful in this country. I listen to Meaningful Money podcasts and learn a lot. We have a culture of debt and race to the bottom in this country so ignore the so called 'friends' and continue to build a solid financial foundation for life!

It's funny to hear things like restaurants or cake and coffee thrown around as I guess they're what most people like to do. I do drink coffee though mostly at home and I don't like cake. I rarely go out to drink coffee as I make better coffee at home. I recently installed a big fire with oven and whatnot and I quite enjoy cooking with it making bread etc. I prefer being indoors and having expensive and nice things in my home than going out for fleeting moments. Travel is different because it's more.culteral but

I guess assuming anybody who doesn't go out drinking or to go to restaurants a lot etc is narrow minded in a way. It's like me assuming because you love horses you think that anybody who doesn't have regular lessons or their own horse is missing out on some life altering experience when in reality most people would just see it as a waste of money and hard work.

I bought a plate set a few months ago for just over a hundred pounds and my friend made a sarcy comment about not being able to afford that but then went on to spend 60 pounds in a restaurant that evening and was going out twice more that week.

So I think judging somebody elses priorities by your own wants and desires is wrong.

Also if somebodies parents can pay their student loan off it will give them a huge leg up. That advice osnwrong. It's essentially a lifetime of extra tax if you are a middle rate earner with no prospect of paying it back quickly and no chance of it being written off. This is particularly true for student debt when you're very young and have much longer to acrue interest over, if you have already been paying it for 35 years it perhaps makes less difference.

@Anotherparkingthread
It used the be the famous mums net hot chocolate.

Eg people going out and denying their dc a hot chocolate and someone called them mean.

Of course it came down to, well can you honestly afford these treats or not. If you can yes it's mean.

I think it's a euphemism for simply having some small extras when out and about doing whatever.

They were good threads actually and I never knew what I could afford and found it frustrating so from that and rl stuff we deeply organised our money down to the last pound to make sure.... We can save, have money for essentials and... Know if we are out do fancy something extra like that hot chocolate we can without guilt or stress.

I think YANBU to save as much as you want to and can afford but I think YABU for this comment alone. Of course it's about a salary 😆

Id love to always have saved a high proportion of my income but given that at various points of my life we paid more / almost as much in childcare as my salary it wasn't always possible.
Personally I don't know anyone who I think could manage to save that much after mortgage/bills/childcare/kids stuff but everyone's circumstances are different. I wouldn't say you had problems with money but I'd be a bit incredulous if I had this conversation with someone.

@TooTiredToType77 I'm the same as you.

I've paid my dc to read some finance books, not many just a few

I think you save too much unless you earn a huge amount of money each month.

What are you saving for exactly? Some people can’t answer that question. They don’t know. A rainy day that never comes ? Early retirement ?

For me, saving us sensible but it shouldn’t stop you doing things in the here and now.

OP clearly doesn’t earn a huge amount as she’s still renting and her landlord even reduced her rent (although I see from rest of thread that this is something of a thorny issue for the Op!)

what, so being in a relationship and owning a house makes someone's life more superior and worthy of envy? regardless of how much in debt they are, what state or shit area the house is in or how abusive the relationship is?
but renting and/or being single isn't something to aspire to?
wow!

savings very hard and possibly missing out on some friend activities

Bullied at work to such an extent that paid off to leave . Finances such that landlord reduces rent

still renting but wanting to buy

single… if op happy, cool. lots are. but many 31 year olds might like to enjoy falling in love and being with someone.

All i’m saying is

if the op has just bought a beautiful home that she had put down a massive deposit to; hadn’t recently endured being pushed out of work due to bullying; was loved up in a new relationship…. I may more understand the accusations this friend is jealous !

this used to be the advice but is now a bit outdated after overall cost of SL's and, more recently, the interest has gone up so much.

Before MSE (and others) recommended not to pay it off because the average person would never pay back their entire loan anyway before they reached the 'write off' age and the interest rate was comparatively low. Now the interest on a SL is higher than my mortgage, the 'write off' age is later (e.g. it was after 25 years when I started, and at one point during the 2008 recession was at 0% interest, and is now after 40 years, and is about 7% interest), people are working for longer = all mean many people (depending on their job) will end up repaying far more than they actually got. Obviously in some cases the money might be better off elsewhere (e.g. a house deposit) but if it is genuinely spare cash then writing off the SL is actually a good idea.

Surely no one here can judge if you are unreasonable or not. It very much depends on your income, number of dependents, your mortgage, bills, etc etc. if you are on a good income and comfortably save half while meeting all your outgoings comfortably then crack on but for the vast majority of normal people this just isn’t possible. Each to their own. Sounds like you are in a lucky position.

phrasing it that way makes a bit more sense, your original post basically suggested there was nothing in her life that anyone would be jealous of, which seems a bit harsh!

some people might be jealous of reduced rent, let alone anything else!

You could as easily say:
OP fought to get a settlement when many people would have let it go
Managed to get a better job and has had another promotion since
Has a significant amount of savings
Has a decent landlord (like gold dust sometimes!)
Is likely to achieve her goal of buying a house fairly soon (something that is completely out of reach for many single people, and even for many in relationships)
has friends and a social life
and might not even want a partner!

I imagine the OP took one hellava knock with being dismissed like that and probably felt very low about it.

Her friends no doubt still worry about her

Retirement perhaps?

That sounds fine. You are lucky to be able to live comfortably, if not luxuriously, on half your take home pay. Saving for a future house purchase and emergencies is sensible. As long as it doesn't come across as insensitive to other people who may be struggling financially when you discuss this.

I fully support it and have always done this myself.

I'm 50 now and am looking forward to retiring a little earlier. I have everythijg I need. I still enjoy my life, I just don't buy loads of crap and I think carefully about every purchase. I don't spend loads on house decor, everything is functional, cosy and clean.
I've taught my child to do the same.

Life is good with doing things, rather than buying things.

My rent alone is about half of my income so that wouldn't work in my circumstances at all

Nice if you can and have something to save for.

Personally , with a family that all seem to die into their 60s, I personally would want to enjoy my living a little more as there is a good biological chance id be saving for someone else's benefit anyway