I’ll try to give an overview of what happened without too many telling details but trying not to drip feed. I’m really struggling to get perspective on this and obviously people close to me are very involved and therefore biased.
A few years ago (as an adult) I reported historical CSA by an uncle to the police. The police took the case to trial and he was actually convicted. At the time of the CSA he was married to my mother’s sister, they divorced a few years later for supposedly unrelated reasons (I don’t really know).
Some family members who I was previously very close with did not believe me (even as an adult). They actively assisted his defence lawyers with his defence during the trial, gave evidence against me and even once the jury found him guilty believed that he was wrongfully convicted. They gave evidence and information to humiliate me and discredit me in court, all banded together and gave evidence of particular things I know aren’t true and suspect they deliberately lied about to assist his case. I believe their belief was along the lines that I was delusional/crazy/mistaken rather than flat out lying - not sure which is worse tbh.
anyway, after his conviction 2 further victims came forward (that I was unaware of before then) and the whole thing unravelled. They now realise they were in the wrong and have been deeply apologetic (to their credit) but I haven’t engaged with them at all so haven’t really unpacked everything that happened.
some years have passed and I know other members of the family (who did support me) have reconciled with them and would like me to as well. I’m still not sure that I can even speak to them let alone envisage a future where we have a loving or trusting relationship.
I’m wondering if others feel that they could forgive this? Or have been in this situation before?
YABU - I would forgive them
YANBU - I wouldn’t be able to