Play date in XL Bully house

[Bonneylass]

School mum has invited my son over to play. They own an XL bully. Apparently it’s a lovely dog and they have 3 kids at home. I really don’t want him to go, I just don’t think it’s worth the risk. Is it best to make up an excuse or just be honest? Interested to hear from owners of XL bullies how you would react to this. She’s a lovely lady and ideally I don’t want to piss her off.

Absolutely never, not a chance. I'd even be upfront and tell her it's because of the dog. These people are delusional.

No I would not send a child by choice anywhere near an XL Bully.

I don't know what I'd say to the Mum as I honestly think the people who have these dogs are complete morons.

I wouldn't let him go and I have a dog!
My dog is fine when DC have friends over and he's not an aggressive dog at all but also I would never leave him unsupervised with DC he doesn't know, any dog can get anxious or stressed and snap and when it's an XL bully that's really bad news

@PyreneanAubrie he's about 4 inches tall. If he was any bigger he would be terrifying, although, had he been bigger I imagine DD would have asked me for help training him sooner, or at least mentioned that he hates everything and everyone that is not part of his immediate family.

Like most small dog owners she didn't take his aggression seriously because she could pick him up and put him in her coat when he started making a spectacle of himself, which did nothing more than reinforce to him that all of these strange things were a threat and needed immediate action to keep them at bay.

To be fair, despite working with and studying dogs and their behaviour for years, I am guilty of the same. When the big dog showed reactivity around high-value treats we didn't find it cute or amusing, we took immediate action. When one of the chihuahuas did it we laughed at her, recorded it, and then worked with her for her own sake. It's funny when a chihuahua does (it's really not) but when a rottweiler does it, it's an issue.

Training bigger dogs is also easier because people are more sensible around them. If a strange rottweiler was growling and snarling I imagine people would cross the street. When a tiny ball of fluff is doing it people laugh and try to touch him anyway I have the confidence to tell people back the fuck off away from my dog. DD didn't when she was out with him which also made it worse.

This is why you find a lot of small breeds have issues with aggression whereas bigger dogs tend to be more gentle and better trained.

Here's the culprit looking all sweet and innocent whilst secretly plotting a mass killing spree.

@catscalledbeanz Stop trying to justify putting a child at risk

I’d strongly advise against this.

I have a German wire haired pointer, he is lovely natured but boisterous. I have been very careful with inviting my daughter’s friends over. So an XL bully who have a certain reputation, no way would I take that risk.

That doesn't sound much like a dilemma to me!

I'd be less inclined to trust the Christmas Rottweiler than I would the XL Bully, not because I don't trust the breed, Rotts are typically gentle by nature being a traditional livestock guardian breed, but because of the situation.

Breed plays little into whether an attack will be likely, whereas in over 83% of fatalities, a small number of factors have been identified as being present, 3 of which are an unfamiliar environment, the victim was not immediate family, and a lack of supervision by a responsible, able-bodied adult. Add that to the size of the dog and you're asking for trouble.

I'd also question the BIL's ability to train and socialise any animal. I know and trust my dog but that is a situation I would never place him in, for his own sake if nothing else. If we have strange people around, especially children who are unpredictable and unsettling for even the best of dogs and I cannot supervise 100%, my dogs are either kept in another part of the house away from the danger or they are kennelled. It's a stressful environment even for well-socialised dogs. And the second someone tells me their child has no boundaries around animals I remove myself and my animal from the vicinity.

Sorry but a Rottweiler is a droving dog, it is not and never has been a Livestock Guarding breed. In fact it's not even a guarding breed.

OP, my apologies. I was so aghast at the situation that I mislaid my reading comprehension! Can completely understand not wanting school gate awkwardness, and XL bully owners aren’t that likely to be rational in my experience.
In that situation I’d probably go down the ‘I’m scared of big dogs’ route that a PP mentioned.

Nope, not a chance. It might be used to children but it's not used to your child.

HNRTFT but a big No .Just Be honest and say why, because the parents need to have it drummed in that XL dogs are a menace.
I love dogs BTW .

OP I wouldn’t even go to someone’s house if they had an XL bully and I’m in my 30’s. Let alone send my child

seriously? Please search up some images of the injury to young children! Big fat NO.

No way would I allow my child in a house with an XL bully, don't care if the owner says it's a lovely family pet, your son isn't part of their family and if he accidently did something to annoy the dog, it would possibly go for him and win.

@Frequency Breed plays little into whether an attack will be likely

Utter nonsense! It's been PROVEN by professors in animal science & animal behaviours that the 'breed' (XL Bully) has unstable & violent tendencies. It's quite literally in their DNA! Why do you think they've been banned?!?! Just a hunch? A preference?!

Ffs. It winds me up no end when people on social media with zero credentials on a subject (I'm presuming this because if you did have professional credentials, you'd have made that quite clear by now) declare that they know so much better than qualified experts who've studied & worked on the subject, their entire careers! See also Covid vaccines 🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️🤦🏼‍♀️

Absolutely not.

Tell her the truth. If you don't you may keep getting invited.

Exactly.
I would. 👍

I haven't read any studies into the DNA of XL Bullies but I would be interested to if you have any links/study names or names of the academics who published them? As far as I was aware the XL Bully is not even a recognised breed let alone one whose DNA could be or was being studied. How did they factor in the different mixtures of breeds that make up individual dogs classed as XL Bully?

The stats I posted are from a peer-reviewed study. When studying fatalities caused by dogs it was found that breed wasn't a correlating factor, however, 2 or more specific environmental circumstances were found to be present in over 83% of attacks, thus leading to the conclusion that management of the dog plays a much bigger role in whether they will go on to attack than breed does.

https://positively.com/victoria-stilwell/post/advocacy-fatal-dog-bites-share-common-factors

The study itself is behind a paywall but the above summarises it. I had paid access to the journal quoted because I needed it when studying for my degree in Canine Behaviour and Welfare. I don't feel the need to post a list of my qualifications when contributing to threads on a social media forum.

Like I said, I'm on the fence about these dogs, we have no evidence either way because we do not collect enough data on dogs in general or canine aggression towards humans to ever know enough to decide if one specific breed is inherently more aggressive or if there are just more of them in existence than other breeds.

I haven't read any studies into the DNA of XL Bullies

XL Bully isn't a genotype (DNA), it's a phenotype (what it looks like), so it is not possible to sequence the genome of an XL Bully,

https://banthebullyxluk.wordpress.com/2023/08/01/finding-kimbo/ Well reading this and the fact that the majority of them over here come from killer kimbos bloodline I'd say there is an issue with their DNA

just say you/ your kid is scared of dogs - keep it impersonal.

Well yes, we know there is an issue with the DNA, but you can't take a single XL Bully and sequence its genome and declare this the XL Bully genome, because they are classified by how they LOOK.

Why? Her child doesn't have an issue with dogs, it's very specifically because this woman owns a dangerous, controlled breed. She should know that, it might make her think twice about why she feels the need to have one.

No, def wouldnt have strange kids around any dog TBH.
Either they are big enough to harm the kids or small enough they could be harmed.
Too young and might cause an accident from being overexcitable, too old and might be grumpy and snappy (understandable).
I would want to closely monitor any interactions and that usually just doesnt happen.

Im having adult family over for xmas and my midget psychopath will be crated for the duration as I just dont trust him (even though he is the size of a breadbox!).