Could you be with a man who would have voted Trump?

[Trumpz]

Just that really.

My husband doesn't love Trump exactly but said tonight he would have voted for him and he hopes Trump will "dismantle the deep state".

Could you be with a Trump voter? Interested in people's views.

It was repeated on TV last night. He told a crowd of angry people to march to the Capitol and be prepared to fight or lose their country. This was in public.

This is a good summary of what he actually said
Did Trump's words at rally incite the riot? https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-55640437

regardless of the actual language used, he was without question trying to persuade his supporters that the election result was wrong and should be overturned. Do all trump supporters believe he was right to do this? Or perhaps not, but they voted for him anyway 🥴

Disappointed at the heteronormative phrasing of your OP @Trumpz not very zeitgeisty. Or perhaps you yourself are more Trumpian than you think. Blind spots, projection and all that.

If he's a British man in the UK then I would struggle with it. I wouldn't leave an otherwise happy, loving, secure marriage over it but I would have big questions and be very upset.

But if in the USA then I just don't know. Instinctively, yes, I wouldn't like it but I also think that there must be something that we just don't understand in the UK that has allowed Trump back into power. I know several Americans who I like very much, respect and consider to be good people who all voted for Trump. It's incomprehensible to a British mind but it has made sense to dozens of millions of American people who are not that different to us. They cannot all be wrong/stupid/misguided/bigoted/bad people.

I have only engaged with two people over it directly. They both despise Trump as a person. But still voted for him. Both cited cost of living, taxes and the belief that they will be better off financially as a family. Direct quotes from one: 'I don't need Trump to be my friend (ugh), I need him to fix this country.' and 'He's a bad person for sure, but I think he will be good for America.'

You could say those are selfish, deplorable reasons for voting Trump. And I'd agree they possibly are. But I also think they're understandable. Most people, when it comes to it, will probably vote in their own self interest when it comes to it - or at least seriously consider it. And there is no even slightly credible 3rd option in the US for them to take as an alternative or protest vote. As a silly, much lesser, example: I couldn't bring myself to vote Labour because I teach in an independent school and felt I would voting myself out of my job. Even though I believed they would be better for the majority of people. But I could never vote Tory either. So I voted Lib Dem (I've actually always been a Lib Dem but would have voted Labour to help get Tories out if it wasn't for their private school policy - pure self interest). I know Lib Dems aren't a realistic 3rd option but they've got a lot of MPs. Not something that can happen for any 3rd party in the US.

So, no, I would disagree with someone who voted for Trump but I can understand their reasons and it wouldn't be a deal breaker. If they thought Trump was a great person on the other hand ... yikes!

Generally I'm fairly live and let live around politics, my biggest issue with the US is the revoking of Roe vs Wade ( right to abortion). Trump oversaw this (supreme court appointed by him) but Biden could have made a different decision but chose not to. So both equally bad in this regard.

My sister in law has the same opinions as you and is in the usa illegally as she overstayed her esta.. she is also illegally working. It was her trump voter husband's idea (not hers). Would you encourage foreign family members to immigrate illegally to the usa and overstay her estaa and then supporting deporting anyone who isn't related to you ?

So you are contemplating your marriage given your DH would conceptually vote for Trump?

Jesus wept.

Do him a favour and free the poor bastard - I would not want to be with someone who dictated how I vote. Talk about controlling.

this is my favourite comment so far 😆

😂

No- not because he's a right winger but because he's an utterly immature babbling crook who sees women as chattels. ( Trump that is not H)

I'm not dictating how he votes. How could I? He isn't even voting in the US election.

I'm just interested in whether women would have an issue with their partner supporting a man who is so openly a misogynist. Surely it's undeniable he is a misogynist? And I was interested whether that is a deal breaker.

We live in a free world as Trump loves to say. My H is free to hold his opinions. And I am free to respond to them.

dismantle the deep state

That’s your cue to run. Fully fledged conspiracy theorist.

No

We can kind of blame Harris and her party for this. When you hear Americans speak about their voting, it's pretty clear Harris didn't get a clear message out about what she would do to help them. Her campaign was more focused around criticising Trump. Everyone knows what he has done, the crimes he has committed, this is not new information so to focus on that was a a waste of the short time she had to persuade people of her skills and policies.

It's a bit like here, Starmer didn't really win, Sunak lost, was lesser of 2 evils. Same there, people thought 'better the devil you know'. Trump didn't win, Harris lost.

I keep seeing comments like this. What do you mean? What's the 'conspiracy'? Are you saying you don't think there's a deep state?
Because you know that would be utter BS, right?

He has the right to his own opinions and his wife/partner has the right to disagree with them and to leave him if his views are too extreme for her.

It's madness! Among the genuine concerns there's so much hyperbole.
No I wouldn't leave my husband. He's a good man who loves me and his kids and has always done his best for our family. His kids need him now now than ever in their teen years. I wouldn't leave him because he might have voted for trump. I would listen to why he might have voted for trump and he would have listened to my opinion as that's how two way conversations work.

There needs to be more listening and less blaming, labelling and assuming because this sort of black and white thinking seems to be creating ever more division rather then solving problems.

DH and I have slightly different political leanings but broadly agree on all the points that matter. Different is fine, and I respect and am interested in the differences of opinion among friends etc. But with the Trump thing you are asking if I would want to be married to someone largely devoid of critical thinking skills and likely a bit dim - no, I really wouldn't.

Certainly. You are voting for the party rather than the individual candidate chosen to represent it. I think the voters must have had it in mind whether they want another four years of a Democratic administration.

So much puff about how posters would leave a husband who voted Trump/Reform/Brexit - as if! No one with any sense throws away their relationship solely because their partner holds different political views. Even if you really disagree. And it's always the left wing who make these ridiculous threats - you never see a Tory voter threatening to leave their spouse for voting Labour!

Somewhere along the way, we've absorbed this idea that the left wing are better, nicer, more honest. And it's all bullshit. Lefty men are more than capable of being misogynists too, who talk a good game, but will throw women under the bus in a heartbeat if it suits them to! The left wing are as capable of being as self serving and corrupt as the right.

Couples are allowed to have different opinions!

I don't like Trump, but portraying the 50million + Americans who voted for him as all misogynistic low IQ crazies is equally foolish. It's important to look at why people felt he was their best option. Economies are struggling and people then get a bit desperate and will vote for anyone who they believe will change their day to day lives, help them pay rent and put food on the table. So maybe those voting for Trump aren't doing so because they hate women, but because in their world feeding their family is more important than Trumps police record. I wouldn't vote for him, but I can say that from a position of privilege where we have free education, and healthcare and I am financially secure. Desperate people do desperate things!

I’d leave mine if he voted Reform. I can deal with him being a left leaning Tory. Reform would be a step too far.

Yes. Let's be honest kamala wasn't up to running the country either, she could barely hold an interview. And that's not because she's a woman, it's because she just wasn't fit.
Trump isn't either, but he is likely to make America more stable financially and globally. They need to recover from the Biden situation.
A third option would have been better, but realistically they had 2 awful options to decide between.

I can see why people did vote for Trump TBH.
I think he's a consequence of the left becoming deeply authoritarian and attacking people who dont go along with their ideologies. Cause and effect, call people stupid for long enough and they'll do something stupid just to shit on your breakfast cereal.

It would depend on the choices available. In the US election the choice was between an appalling candidate and an abysmal one. Considering he was up against Harris, Trump doesn't look all that bad. I mean, worse, but people weren't comparing him to a decent person or a competent candidate for presidency, they were comparing him against someone almost as dreadful.

I can understand why people would (and did) vote for Trump. If you're going to get an atrocious president anyway, you may as well go with the one who is more likely to shake things up. For good or bad. America, like many western countries, is on its knees and large swathes of the population feel like the current system doesn't work for them.