How much does your size/weight bother you?

[AllAboutJazz]

I'd say I'm healthy, fairly fit and active.

I make a lot of effort to cook healthy meals, drink green tea (blugh), avoid processed food etc. I'm not thin, but not exactly fat either, just...plump? BMI 22.5 but I'm short, so I could stand to lose a stone.

I own my house and have a business, really love my job, have a few friends who are lovely, a great partner and freedom to more or less do as I please - a very lucky life.

Why then am I so unhappy not being thin? It's like I can't let myself be happy, because I should be smaller.

How often do you think about your size/weight? How much does it affect your happiness?

We grew up being told that Bridget Jones was fat. That's why.

So long as you are in the healthy range, your size and shape are the least interesting things about you. You feel sad because society has told you that you are not good enough unless you're skinny. But we all know that's stupid. Being healthy is the most important thing. It sounds like you are rocking life. You need to focus on caring for yourself, eat well, exercise, take care of your body.

I'm the biggest I've ever been postpartum (size 10) but happiest I've ever been. The extra weight will come off in time but I'm not rushing it, nor do I feel sad about it. It's just a thing. I go for a run every morning, I eat healthy food. I have energy and am happy with my life. There is no point worrying about something so boring and inconsequential x

Occasionally, but not enough for me to prioritise doing anything about it. I know I need to lose about 3 stone but with everything else I need to do it's just not high enough on the list. One day I'll have the time and motivation to address it but until then I'm happy and couldn't really care less what other people think.

I'm a solid size 14. I don't love it. I eat very healthily and I'm fit. To be honest I'm just happy I don't appear to have cancer or heart problems (I'm 58). But yes I'd like to be a size 12.

Don’t drink green tea if you hate it - it’s not that good for you that it’s worth choking it down.

I remember being told I was fat by my ex when I was a size 10/12 and had lost a fair bit of weight, (not intentional i was out clubbing all weekend every weekend and my contraceptive pill was also making me feel sick so I wasn't eating much). Ever since it's given me a massive complex about my weight, he was a nasty abusive bully but sadly those words have stuck with me.

I never had an issue with my weight before I met him. I never thought about my weight either. Now it's something I think about most days and instead of making me think about food and eat better it makes me eat crap and I've been overweight ever since.

Not happy tbh. Size 14, 5'7. But I know I could be thinner and healthier. I eat too much crap and I drink wine. It's not so much my size it's the flab and bloatedness around my face.

But alas life is hard and chocolate and wine help. I hope when my dc get bigger and I have a bit more me time I will sort it out.

Its so true. Bridget Jones was apparently fat, (!) and I remember reading how Geri was the 'fat one' in the Spice Girls at a very impressionable age.

Logically, I know thinness has no correlation to happiness or success and you're right, no one else cares.

But I still can't help thinking 'but if I just lost a stone...'

I annoy myself! I just want to be happy in my own skin/shape.

It consumes my every waking moment. I’m either stressed because I’m hungry or stressed because I’ve eaten.

I'm a size 10/12

All the time. My happiness is correlated with how I feel about my body. Objectively I'm slim and healthy, but I can't help but obsess if my stomach becomes less than perfectly flat etc.

It's very wearying, I wish I wasn't like this.

Since you mention size, I wish I was average, or even slightly below average height nearly every day. I'm under 5 foot. It really does impact on so much.

With a BMI 22.5 you don’t need to lose a stone. You might benefit from weight training to body recomp if you have some excess body fat but there does come a point IMO where you can’t ’lose weight’ to your ideal body, it’s recomping that’s needed

I have significant weight to lose. I think about it a lot.

I’m a 16-18. I used to be a 26. I weigh myself every morning and there is a direct correlation between me losing weight and my happiness. It is, I would say, the biggest influence on my general mood. I wish it wasn’t, I wish I could be fat and happy, but I can’t.

I am shocked people here are saying size 10 is big! Without being specific on numbers, I tend not to worry about my own weight/size/shape until I catch view of my body in a mirror or a bad photo. To be honest, I am more concerned about my partner's.

it seems unlikely you would be considered ‘plump’ with a bmi of 22.5 by anyone other than your own head.

when my bmi was 19/20 I was really unwell- my periods stopped, I was losing bone density and was cold, irritable and was severely food restricting. I lost all my breast tissue and my ribs were sticking out. I never fell below a size 8 and yet I was objectively unwell (saw endocrinology as my blood hormone levels were awful and yet the only issue was I was restricting food)

My bmi is now 22 and I feel solid and heavy.

The mind is so cruel when it’s been conditioned by society to value only thinness.

I'm 5'7 and a size 6. And I fucking hate it. I don't watch what I eat at all but I've got an overactive thyroid that's made weight just fall off. I feel like shit and I hate that being tall makes it look even worse. Being skinny is not a good look at all.

We grew up being told that Bridget Jones was fat. That's why.

No - that’s a complete misreading of Helen Fielding’s intended meaning! Bridget thinks she weighs too much despite being a weight that is so obviously not overweight. Bridget thinks she’s fat but the reader can tell that she’s obviously not and it’s all in her head and she’s worrying over nothing.

And so it’s basically a comment on women -
like the many on this thread already - who think they’re fat and need to lose weight when they obviously don’t.

My BMI and height are very similar to yours but I have a higher than average muscle mass. My weight bothers me waaaay more than it should, I struggle not to think about it.

I was happiest in myself when I was 3kg or so lighter. But weirdly when I look back at photos I think I look awful because I looked so masculine and had no boobs.

Its so true. Bridget Jones was apparently fat, (!)

I don't understand these comments. Zellweger had to stop going to the gym and eat a 4000 calorie per day diet to deliverately put on significant weight for the role because the character was meant to be overweight. Not hugely obese, but overweight.

Anyway, OP, I would not bother thinking about weight except in terms of health. Other people really aren't interested in your weight unless it is extreme so the issue here is you fixating on it if you are not overweight to an extent that it is a health problem. Perhaps therapy to work on self-esteem would be helpful.

This thread is making me feel overwhelmed with body hatred all over again (not that it ever left me but I can feel the self revulsion spiralling as I read)

and yet also so sad at all these women with healthy weights who think about it all the time and wish for different.

society has been so bloody awful to us

I do enjoy weight training, although I could definitely do more than I currently do - I don't think I've even got a significant amount of fat at all; it's more that I want to just be thin. Like Victoria Beckham thin, even though I'm a totally different shape, I'm envious of that very slim look.

But would it make be happier?! Probably not, just hungrier! But the wish is still there.

These threads make me so sad. I'm 5'4, size 18-20 and no clue what I weigh or what my BMI is because there are just so many other things in life to think about and do and enjoy.

I like how I look and I appreciate my body for what it lets me do - ride, swim, read, dance - but I also don't spend that much time thinking about it unless it hurts. Which due to competitive dancing as a teenager, sometimes my hips do.

I spent a lot of time in my teens and twenties actively unlearning the idea that you're only worthy if you're thin with clear skin and also desired by a man and my life is much happier for it. I often wish I could wave a wand for every woman who is plagued by these thoughts.

I've also lost several friends and family members long before their time and it's given me some sense of perspective that we really do only get one life, so I'm fucked if I'm going to waste any of it worrying about weight/size/shape 🤷‍♀️

Appreciate that may not be a popular stance!

No I expect at your BMI you don’t have much fat. Bear mind VB is thin basically as a career - she’s reportedly eaten the same boring meal for years on end…it’s no way to live. I’m sure you are slim and look lovely.

BMI 19 size 8-10 and really unhappy

You sound amazing and your perspective is how we should all see it😊