Multiple kisses after every text (DH)

[FruityLoop1]

Kiss etiquette! 💋

DH has always been big on sending multiple kisses after every text message. Just came across some of our old messages and he would put around 30 (!) after every message, even if just discussing what to have for tea lol. I would feel pressured to put an equal amount and if I didn’t he would feel like I was in a mood with him or off with him.

Fast forward to the present day and we roughly put around XXXX four kisses after each message but it’s hard work! Sometimes I just need to send a quick message or we are just discussing something mundane etc. Kisses after each exchange are overkill surely? He gets upset if I send no kisses even if I’m just asking if he’s put the bins out! A loving message-fair enough but after every tiny reply it’s too much surely?

AIBU? Is around 3 lines of kisses in the early days overkill?! Is it a red flag? 🚩

I think it’s the pressure, years later that I still feel like I have to put kisses every time. We are not young either! What is everyone’s opinion please?

Urgh, xh used to ask why I hadn't put an x occasion, um, probably just busy looking after 2 toddlers? Notice the xh bit?

I hardly use x unless to my family, guys on online dating x after every message, which is off putting. I do like to finish with an emoji, especially if it's a text that could be misconstrued, but YANBU to not xxxx after every text.

My 11yo old dd sends me about 30 x but she's a young girl, not a grown man!

The problem isn't the XXXX, it's remembering to do it and having to censor your message to add crap on the end that you don't want to add to appease a man who can't cope with normal communication. That's what I think is not fine.

That is a bit OTT @FruityLoop1 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Putting kisses after each message is as ridiculous as kissing someone between every exchange in a face-to-face conversation.

A friend does this in a group chat where it's even more absurd.

The first thing that came to my mind when I read you post was awww bless him 😂
That would really irritate me though, I guess just keep replying with one X? It must just be a habit.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 😂

This would be a massive ick for me, but from day one.

However, as you have previously joined in, if you no longer want to then you'll need to tell him.

I put kisses at the end of every message to my DH, and he puts kisses at the end of every message to me too. We always have done so I'd find it unusual if either of us suddenly stopped. That being said, we don't necessarily send each other the same amount and it depends on the couple what they feel happy with.

If it takes too much out of your life putting 4 x’s on a text, then don’t do it. 🙄

*suddenly paranoid I might be in a group chat with @niadainud 🙈

You could be posting about my DH, it's been from a couple of weeks in during a loved up exchange and it's still happening. Does my head in when I'm busy.

It's absolutely pointless if it's an obligation on all messages rather than a genuine expression of fondness when the mood takes. It's like a tic

Haha! Don't worry, it's a bloke. And he's a bit of a muppet, tbh.

Just tell him, from now on DH, every ♥️ is the equivalent of 10 kisses. Job done!

We always did seven kisses until we swapped to WhatsApp about 10 years into our relationship 😂 so weird. I think WhatsApp just felt more of an ongoing conversation so no finality of kisses needed. Also the 7 kisses was just an autofill in the end. Barmy!

Way too high maintenance if it upsets his mood to not receive them!
But also it isn't something I'd have engaged in from the start so we're all different.

I genuinely had no idea if me and DH used X's or not .... Just looked and nope, not a thing here. I do add the odd X on my group whatsapp chats depending on the group and what others do. But absolute max is 2.
If me and DH show affection in a message it'll be this emoji 😘 but one will do and it's far more likely if someone is doing a journey or going for a night out etc...akin to making sure the last thing you said is "love you" just in case something bad happens.

Exchanging shopping lists and instructions about the kids doesn't require any love!

I’ll be dead inside with you, I’m irritated on your behalf and I honestly couldn’t take my DH seriously if he started moaning seriously about the number of xx on a message, I find the whole concept a bit ikky.

Do a xx, don’t do a xx but don’t whinge about what anyone else wants to do.

We do 2 or 3 after every message (together 25 years) and if he sends a message without any, there will always be another message quickly sent with the xxx on (I know, sad.....Cant find the vomit emoji on here)

Fuck that shite. I don't put kisses on any messages.

Four x’s is hardly OTT so at least he’s dialled it back from rows of them.

I dated someone once who was very annoying with a combo of kisses and emojis after every message - he liked to refer to himself as ‘bear’ (I did not start this I swear!!) and each message looked pretty much like this at the end:

xxxx💗💓💓💓💗💗💗🐻🐻❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🐻🐻🐻❤️❤️❤️xxxxxx💓💓💓💓💓xxxxxxxxxxx

It was a lot. We broke up. Not because of the text stuff but it didn’t help.

He sounds exhausting!!

A maximum of 2 is more than enough.

The more kisses doesn’t mean someone loves you more.

I would just put the 4 when the conversation has ended or if it’s a one off message.

If it’s a conversation just put 2.

If he gets upset over it tell him to grow up xx

No point in this thread tbh. You married him so it’s a bit late to ask whether it’s a red flag or not!

AIBU? Is around 3 lines of kisses in the early days overkill?! Is it a red flag?

A bit late to be asking if it's a red flag all these years later!

DH puts kisses after messages. I never do. He doesn’t equate it to how much I love him.

Me too. However OPn you can gradually cut down.... lose an x every 2 weeks until you are left with just one

I feel the ikk is strong with this one 🤮