Multiple kisses after every text (DH)

[FruityLoop1]

Kiss etiquette! 💋

DH has always been big on sending multiple kisses after every text message. Just came across some of our old messages and he would put around 30 (!) after every message, even if just discussing what to have for tea lol. I would feel pressured to put an equal amount and if I didn’t he would feel like I was in a mood with him or off with him.

Fast forward to the present day and we roughly put around XXXX four kisses after each message but it’s hard work! Sometimes I just need to send a quick message or we are just discussing something mundane etc. Kisses after each exchange are overkill surely? He gets upset if I send no kisses even if I’m just asking if he’s put the bins out! A loving message-fair enough but after every tiny reply it’s too much surely?

AIBU? Is around 3 lines of kisses in the early days overkill?! Is it a red flag? 🚩

I think it’s the pressure, years later that I still feel like I have to put kisses every time. We are not young either! What is everyone’s opinion please?

I mean that's obviously just the way he messages. You don't need to do it back. But he sounds loving and affectionate.

XXXXXXX
God that was exhausting, I need a lie down now.

it's very needy childish and pathetic.

I think it's a bit weird that he gets upset about it. Early on when you're not 100% sure of the relationship or whatever I'd see that as kind of charmingly anxious - with someone you're married to I'd just tell him (lovingly) to get a grip and that your marriage and life together is plenty of proof you love him and you don't need to put kisses on the end of everything.

Is it like:

hey can you get milk xxxx
okay xxxx
do we need anything else xxxx
no just milk xxxx
okay see you soon xxxx

or

hey can you get milk?
okay
do we need anything else
no just milk
okay see you soon xxxx

If it's the latter where it's at the end of an exchange that's slightly less tedious but if it's the first I'd tell him to grow up haha.

😂 we do about that! In my defence once I've put one it autocorrects to about 30..!

Life’s too short, send him the kisses. I rarely even get a text from my DH 😂

x - normal
Xx - normal with a little something extra
xc - rushed normal
c - rushed lazy normal
Xxxxxxxxx - pisstake kisses
No kisses - couldn't be arsed

I send no kisses ever.

It makes my texts to my teens even more sinister - I enjoy using a full stop and then NO KISSES. 'Come downstairs.' is apparently threatening while no full stop is not. A kiss would make either with or without a . fine and dandy. They never know if dinner's ready or they’re in trouble. 😆

I wouldn’t waste a text if they were in trouble, I'd just yell their full name up the stairs. 😉

I think it’s sweet but maybe just say it to him. You might find you’ll miss it if he goes cold turkey though!

No shit Sherlock

I'm a fan of the kiss 😄😄

But three rows is insane

I feel like one kiss should suffice by now, and even then, not on every message, op x

My husband likes to say (and hear back) a "love you" A LOT.
When he leaves the room to go for a bath, hangs up the phone, goes to work, looks at me in bed etc etc

I found it annoying because if I didn't say it back he would repeat it so I did.

Eventually I just said that the words had lost all meaning and now he's toned it way back.

It was definitely a comfort/reassurance thing for him that turned into a habit... But I also think being married means you need to be able to have conversations about things like this because they build up and small things become the proverbial straw.

It’s this -

hey can you get milk xxxx
okay xxxx
do we need anything else xxxx
no just milk xxxx
okay see you soon xxxx

or

Where are the bin bags? Xxxx
Have you looked in the cupboard? Xxxxx
I’ll check now. Xxxxx

🙈

Ha ha! I once did this to a friend of mine, accidentally autocorrected to about 3 lines of XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

I think she was confused 😆

I'm a big xxxx on texts...
But my DH isn't. He never puts them. Tbh I then read his messages in my head as cold. I logically know they aren't as we've been married 10 years abd have a happy living marriage. But it does make me ad. I don't say anything coz I don't want him to do it out of pity or duty.
But I do think k if you know your husband likes it why not just put an x after each txt? It doesn't take long

30 kisses after every text message. That would have me running for the hills.

The fact he now expects 4 kisses and gets in a huff if you don’t, is again a big red flag. It’s not the kisses so much, it’s his mood if you don’t conform to his demand.

Yeah this would do my head in but I’m not sure why…too clingy maybe? Feels claustrophobic.

I find kisses in texts a major turn off for some reason, I feel frequent kisses on texts come from men who are quite disingenuous and their overuse dilutes them.

I used to see someone who was overboard with the xxx's. We started off with one after each message but as time passed he kept increasing it and I felt pressure to do it too. Once it got to 4 xxxx I'd had enough because like OPs DH, it was every single message, even mundane things.