Friend interrupting when I am talking

[duckduckgooseduckagain]

I meet up with a close friend every few months. We get on well but I am getting increasingly annoyed with her interrupting me when I am speaking. I will be halfway through saying something and she will suddenly notice something and say (for example) "oh look at that dog, it's so cute" Last time I was saying something serious about my mum dying and she just switched subject, pointing at a poster on a wall that showed a band we both like and saying their name in an excited voice. AIBU for letting this really annoy me? What would you do?

ADHD? I do this but its not intentional.

Oh dear, I do this to DH all the time. Its a terrible habit and also rude. Sorry OP about your mum😞

Me too. I try so hard not to, but can't help it sometimes

I must admit I interrupt quite a lot. I really don't mean to and I did notice on a few occasions, a few years ago, I was terrible for doing it, especially with colleagues. It wasn't like totally changing the subject like your friend, look at that dog/poster/whatever....I think it was more I was keen to share my experience or opinion on their subject.

I am aware I do it and I try really really hard not to do it. Sorry no advice really 😣

I have a friend who does this and I put up with it for so long then I tell her to shut up. It works until the next time I see her.

It's annoying especially if you're talking about something important/serious. I know someone who will interject to show random phone photos mid conversation, the art of conversation is being lost 🤔

My DH does this and has ADHD. It drives me mad but at least his interruptions are usually on topic. He hates that he does it so I try to be nice about it. So sorry she did it when you were discussing your mum, my darling mum died earlier this year and that would really upset me

I've spent way too much time with people who just talk right over me, cutting me off when I'm right in the middle of a word. I don't care what conditions they have or what excuses they give, or whether they can help it or not, I hate it and it's not quality socialising for me. I'd rather read a book alone than talk to someone who whiplashes right across what I'm saying as if it's nothing. I'd give them a wide berth.

I am a massive interrupter, I often don’t notice that I am doing it. I ask my Friends to pull me up on it and I Try really hard to be conscious and not do it…but it still happens sometimes.

Tell your friend.

My friend does it constantly. Doesn’t realise he’s doing it. I just say, can you let me finish, or, tell him he keeps interrupting. He also breaks off to do something else mid conversation if something pops into his head, like making a phone call . I just tell him to do it later as it’s not on to come round then carry on like my living room is an office! He’s good about it and will do his best to stop but he’s not made any long term progress over the years. I constantly have to point it out. It’s hard work but he’s got severe ADHD and it’s not deliberate.

Tell her

Jane I love you but your interrupting me again when I speak and it really upsets me, as it makes me feel you aren’t actually listening or care about me

Then you can gauge her reaction a good friend will feel bad if she shows indifference then you know to cool the friendship

I also do this and am ND. I am aware of it and try so hard not to but…

Either she’s has adhd traits, you talk too long or she’s self obsessed. Only you know

My husband does this all the time..it's bloody rude and makes me feel as if I must be boring his arse off. Totally unacceptable.

Interrupting because you're invested in the conversation and want to share your experience/view is completely different from interrupting with something entirely unrelated.

I know that some people really hate the first type, but it doesn't bother me at all, I see it as fairly normal conversation. The second type (which is what you're describing) is just downright rude, and shows that she's not listening/interested in what you're saying. I'm sorry to hear about your mum x

First thing that came to my mind. I try to stop myself from doing it.

My mil is like this and it's very frustrating. I think she has adhd though. Me though, I find it very difficult to confront her and instead of pulling her aside to tell her how annoying it is and how rude it is, I avoid having a conversation with her which is sad but honestly I dread being alone with her. My DH also had adhd but he doesn't interrupt. I have no clue about adhd but does it present differently?

My mil will ask a question and when you invest all your energy to answer what she has asked, she doesn't listen and will quickly turn her head and say "oh look at that dog". It's so frustrating.

if........id been miffed id have said so there n then....yabu for let it "really annoy you" first rule of other peopling is they are NOT you-or mindreaders...so if piss you off -tell them if ya bothered.
could be she doesnt actully realise is do it(i know i do so try to contain self when one of my forty thousand other things trys to come out my mouth)

I have one friend like this. It really annoys me as it basically feels like she's not listening. I try to be patient as she's a great friend in other ways.

Omg, I have a friend who does this too, even changed the subject to "ooh think it's going to rain" when I was talking about my mum's recent death and similar when I was talking about a family member being investigated for cancer. I was left thinking "are you actually fucking listening to me?". She's lovely so wonder if ND, her kids are, as are mine actually and I know it is generally inherited. I know I'm prone to interrupting too, but at least it's on topic, for eg. I'd chip in with an anecdote of someone I knew who was investigated for cancer etc.

I have a friend like this, she's really scatty and can't seem to focus for very long to keep a conversation really going. I do love her and she has a heart of gold and, like you, I don't see her very often as I can only do small doses. We could be sitting having a coffee, I'm looking at her, and she's looking at people at the next table, or I'll start talking about something she was talking about & she'll change the subject AND talk over me to do it! Some may see it as rude, but I know she's not being rude.

I know MN diagnoses are often ridiculed, and ND'ity is trundled out on every thread where someone's behaviour is called into question but I am certain my friend has something diagnosable, she has alluded to it herself when talking about her daughter who is ND.

This! Why would anyone want to spend time with someone who doesn't get that you're talking about your mum dying? How do you sustain a relationship with such a person? Why would you even bother to try?

This reads like a Fast Show sketch.