Trick or Treat - AIBU

[Doseofreality]

AIBU in believing that it’s an unwritten rule that you do not Trick or Treat houses that have no Halloween decorations up.

We’ve had numerous bangs (and yes they are bangs) on the door over the past hour, and quite frankly, it’s pissing me off!

That’s definitely the rule here, I had a lit pumpkin out and had lots of trick or treaters knocking but then ran out of sweets so put the decorations away and although there were still plenty of kids out they didn’t come to the door. I did later have one loud knock at about 9pm which I ignored but from the sound of them think that was teens messing about rather than genuine trick or treaters.

In the States, you could knock on anyone’s door, but you knew the ones who went all out with decorations gave the best swag, so you went for those houses. Not really etiquette but self interest! 😀

Where has my story changed exactly? A kitchen light is completely different to a hall or porch light lighting up a front door!

What? If you don’t want people calling you have to sit the evening out in the dark?

Lit pumpkin is the rule in my area. I give lots out and have just escorted DC and friends. There are plenty enough no one goes near those without pumpkins.

In my area we know a lot of neighbours, it’s very much a take ONE rule and don’t be greedy. You’ll still get loads. Be respectful, comment on the decoration, have made some effort with dressing up.

How is it different? We have the hall light on all the time once it gets dark. It doesn't indicate anything.

Of course not. Not all lights are visible from the front of the house.

I do think Americans have a unique super energy when it comes to celebrating holidays, I wish I had the energy, I'm a bit envious of it 😂

On Halloween it does and everyone in the area knows that. If there's no decorations but a porch light or big hall light that comes through the front doot on its fine, if decorations are out it's fine. If there are lights in the house but there isn't a light on at the front door then no.

So how has my story changed?

Me and my kids LOVE Halloween- we decorate our house, get loads of sweets in, get epic costumes. We live in an area that goes all out for Halloween. Every single kid (& there’s genuinely hundreds) knows you only knock if there’s decorations. End of. You are not being unreasonable. And it warms my heart seeing the kids understanding that one person’s heaven is another’s hell! I’m sorry you’ve been bothered tonight xxxx

I moved to a much larger city, but in my small town in California, people went to houses where the outside lights - or porch lights - were on.
Off meant either they were out of treats or they weren’t participating.
What infuriated me was people bringing carloads of kids into town from other towns and hitting neighborhoods they thought would hand out “the good stuff.” After that, they’d move on to another neighborhood and another — very selfish and grabby and inappropriate on the parents’ part.

YANBU.

Apologies. I just realised you responded to a response I had made to a different poster and I thought you were the poster I had responded to.

And no, there is no reason why a hall light is any different to any other light on. It's certainly not where I live. You are basically making up a rule that you are expecting other people to also know.

it did get a bit confusing because it’s Diwali aswell and the kids were so excited they saw the lights and knocked the door
the people didn’t mind though and gave them special Diwali sweets

It's a rule that most people know, if you light up your front door on Halloween its an indication to knock. If you have decorations out, its an indication to knock, especially in my area and it seems by another poster, also in places in the US.

And it's not a rule where I live in Ireland 🤷‍♀️

So what you mean is, it's a rule most people in your location know and it's a rule in some other places too. That doesn't necessarily add up to "most people".

This might sound flippant- it isn’t meant to - but if you have an always-on porch light for security purposes, are you likely to happily switch it off on the night when the streets are busy and a burglar or other ne'er-do-well - in a mask, too - would be able to prowl around without standing out?

It's still a better and more efficient rule than just knocking on any and all doors regardless of decorations or front door light which is what you're advocating because in YOUR area that's what you do, so you don't think it's strange for other areas to do the same.

And there we disagree...

I don't think it's reasonable to expect people to know about random, unwritten rules. You do 🤷‍♀️.

I think when it's only for a few hours early evening, one night a year, for many it won't be a big deal. Really by 7.30/8pm, it should be over with. Failing that, leave it on and resort to what I did today and tie your front gate up.

@OchonAgusOchonOh You're right. When I was a child many elderly people welcomed guisers and threw themselves into the spirit (sorry, unintentional) of things. Trick or treating seems such a poor imitation of the Hallowe'en I remember. Excitement started early October and had built to a fever pitch by 31st. Good to hear it's still happening in Ireland. Don't know about my native Scotland. Been living in England for so long.

Your little rule is to knock on everyone's door no matter who you might be distressing. This is why the majority of people play by the no lights, no decorations, no knock rule.

No. The majority of people where you live may play by your rule. They most definitely don't where I live. I have also never come across anyone who has been distressed by kids knocking on their door at Halloween and I know a lot of people locally.

Maybe read the thread and see you're in the minority then.

Maybe read the thread and realise there are more countries than England.