to think it's like groundhog day on MN

[Fizzadora]

Every day, every single day and sometimes several times a day there are threads from women with useless fucking waste of space partners and fathers to their children who seem to have just opted out of adult life.
Just read another one, father never does anything at all with his 5 year old child. Then she drops in that he doesn't contribute financially either.
For fucks sake women. This is not Afghanistan. You don't have to fucking whisper. Get rid of the tossers. Your children will thank you.
Absolutely livid.

Emotional violence is just as difficult to get away from. Ever heard of a trauma bond?
Blaming the women is not the way forward.

in the US 70% of hetero divorces are instigated by women. no idea why marriage is still so romanticised.

earn 500 million a year but only pay half the bills and give their wife 50p a month

There are a shocking number of cheap bastards who are willing to let their wives/partners struggle because they earn less. And an equally shocking number of women who tolerate this and accept it as normal. No surprise at how many divorced women wind up impoverished.

I’ve dated (and got rid of) so many men who are just useless, they can do their job and that’s it. But I know several women who have useless men who can’t even do a job. I’m making it very clear to my current DBF that I won’t stand for it and won’t accept a man child. It seems in my age range (30-35) the women have the money, job, car, house, pets etc. and men slot into their lives bringing nothing but the means to do a bit of heavy lifting every now and then

People don’t really understand domestic abuse unless they’ve lived through it.
Women tend to form a trauma bond with the perpetrator which is extremely difficult to break.

How true 😂

Cream cheese thread?

Yes, especially partners that aren’t married. Leave!

I agree it's tiring and depressing hearing about other people's absolutely dire relationships. Yes OK the perpetrators are mostly at fault but it takes two people to set a relationship dynamic so the "victims" are not completely blameless. And it's on them to break the cycle. That is difficult and sometimes dangerous, so finding support and safety mechanisms is crucial. But it's still ultimately their responsibility, no one else can do it for them.

This. Worth requiring again and again.

But I lerrrrrrve him! As if he’s some Romeo and you’re a beautiful Juliet. Get over it. Really!

I am sorry to hear that! My ‘I am jealous’ comment seems a little insensitive now.

But I agree with all you have said. Nearly every woman I know does not like their partner and for good reason. The one female friend I do have that idolises hers is married to the biggest wanker of them all (he is really horrible to her but she can’t seem to see it and it’s not my place to point it out)

I've often thought this. I had an ex that hit me twice. The first time I said hit me again and we're done, the second time he hit I dumped him. We didn't live together because we had only been together 8 months. Unsurprisingly being hit didn't motivate me to move in with him or have his children.

I genuinely cannot understand these women who just carry on with the manuscript of moving in and having kids after the first act of violence.

The other subject that drives me nuts

MY BEST FRIEND'S HUSBAND IS HAVING AN AFFAIR SHOULD I TELL HER?

Yes you should fucking tell her.

OH BUT SHE WILL KNOW IT WAS ME I DON'T WANT TO ROCK THE BOAT

...and other handwringing/pearl clutching. Well duh. Are you more concerned with saving face, or are you going to be a good friend and tell her the truth? Rock the fucking boat.

This!! I would be LIVID if one of my friends knew this and didn’t tell me!

on the rare occasion I feel sad about being single, I look at this website, and I feel happy again

Women have no brains it seems society makes women wear makeup and do weird things to their body, pick keep and endlessly complain about useless partners but do nothing about it, either be a sahm or working one, obsess over weight loss drugs etc.

When do they ever use their own brains and not let everyone else do all their thinking for them?

Everyone in their lives or people in their street are constantly judging them especially MIL and school mums them but no one does it on here

But if we didn't have the above on here all it would be is 'am I pregnant or boy/ girl' and baby names'

I hate this sh*t so much. In what world is not telling someone this the answer? You don’t want to rock the boat??? Hun, I have already harpooned the boat. The boat has been destroyed so badly that the titanic watches a movie about it!!

Not only have I immediately told the victim of the cheater about what’s happening, I’ve also signed the cheater up to multiple email subscriptions of random sh*t, tattooed “CHEATER” on their forehead while they slept, and contacted lawyers on the victims behalf to get the best deal out of the divorce!!

Exactly. 👏
Should be cast in stone.
Or, AT LEAST, if you let a man into your space and life, let it be one that improves your life, whichever way suits you.

Help no one likes me and i have no friends... well why should I return the message/ say thank you / meet in a place I don't like/ put myself out by travelling 10 mins .... I just don't understand why I have no one to hang out with!!

Incidentally, I watched Groundhog day last night and I have to say I still thought it was a really good movie. DS11 loved it.

Because you're right, it is a script. I was raised by a violent man and a woman who 'understood' him, tried to reason with him. Outcome: my model of love included being hit and trying to stop the man hitting me. I genuinely didn't find out until my mid-30s that not all men hit their partners. It was a shock.

Women have more chances now: lots of relationship information is available, there's support for abused spouses, mothers can manage alone and will not be vilified for it. But the game's still weighted against women and the emotional programming goes down the generations. I sometimes feel like banging OPs' heads against a wall, but will generally persist in trying to help them break out of that emotional straitjacket.

My groundhog bugbear:
OP says they or someone else display irritating or unsociable behaviour.
Next two dozen posts: You/they sound autistic! Do some online quizzes and seek a diagnosis. If it isn't autism, it's definitely some other ND condition. Don't bother trying to fix the behaviour!

I've been on MN so long that this used to be quite unusual. I'm glad awareness has improved and some support systems are now available but, FFS, jumping on every other thread to say problem behaviours must be caused by disabilities does no-one any favours.

I blame the mothers of these women as well,they often model dependency on worthless men. They don’t drill in to women that you have to be self- reliant and then in a relationship only if it enhances your life as an equal. That’s how I brought up my daughters and it had the desired result. Then there are the mothers who treat sons like little princes who later are incapable of being a decent partner.
I have witnessed with my daughters relationships of equality, with the men equal in earning, child rearing and homemaking. Violence or even shouting is unthinkable and all in the home benefit.No one is perfect, but any conflict is resolved with dialogue and respect.
As other posters have said, as long as the single state is seen as undesirable, at any cost, there will be no change.

You missed out tax on private schools

There’s a lot of patting oneself on the back on this thread

There's a lot to be proud of on this thread