9 year old served ‘birthday drinks’ at sleepover

[Calpi]

My daughter recently attended a birthday sleepover. The girls are 9 years old which I thought was slightly on the young side so I was a little hesitant but agreed.

I have just seen some pictures and I really am not happy. The girls were given ‘birthday drinks’. They were only squash and obviously no alcohol was used but they were served in actual plastic flutes. The drink was bright pink with fizzy sweets in the glass but I’m not happy.

The mum in question parents very differently. Her 9 year old gets bought VERY expensive skincare products. And her daughter acts like a
full on teen - we’re talking crop tops, Stanley cups, skincare, TikTok dances, eyeshadow etc. I have been in the girl’s bedroom and she has a dressing table completely covered in drunk elephant etc. The mum is into that overconsumption stuff she sees online. Fine, parent how you want but I want my daughter to have a childhood and to not be adultified.

AIBU in thinking this was massively inappropriate? Why couldn’t they have just made milkshakes or smoothies? Or an ice cream sundae?

You have interpreted birthday drinks to mean alcohol and that they are pretending to drink alcohol.
but why does birthday drinks need to mean alcohol; maybe normalising it as non alcholohic as this mum has done is actually better (although I do enjoy a good cocktail).

I used to make a very realistic looking, but obviously non-alcoholic fruit punch for all of my daughter's birthday parties. With floating fruit, little umbrellas, fancy straws, the lot. Ladled it out of a big bowl. It was great fun.
You are being very uptight, OP.

I would have no issues with the " birthday drinks " . I agree that some of the other things sound a little too grown up for a nine year old , but not harmful . The only worrying thing on this whole thread is you give your own child alcohol. Give your head a wobble OP .

There’s always been kids who grow up faster than others. I still played with toys into my teens (which I hid from my friends, obviously!) and from about the age of 7 I was surprised how many of my girl school friends wore what I considered ‘teenage clothes’ (whereas I was knocking around in a shell suit!)
There’s not much you can do about that other than hope your own child is quite sure of herself and happy to live life at her own pace without being too influenced by others.

In my day we used to buy those chocolate cigarettes and pretend to smoke them. My mum used to buy them for us- shock horror! 😂

We serve Bucks Fizz on Christmas morning and we give the kiddos freshly squeezed orange juice in flutes, it makes them feel part of the occasion and also a bit special.

The absolute hypocrisy of complaining about soft drinks served in plastic flutes whilst allowing your daughter sips of wine. 🤣

I can't see any good reason for letting a 9 year old have a sip of wine.
But I can see a reason for creating a cute birthday drinks aesthetic with squash. I'm sure the girls loved it.
I can't believe you're this upright when you've said you've given your child wine!!

Either way you sound like you don't really like the friend and judge her mother.

How confusing!
No 9yo dd you absolutely can't have juice at your friends house with sweets. Here, stay home and sip some of my Pinot Grigio instead

How can you square giving your daughter sips of wine with being appalled by mock trials at a party? Pick a lane OP. You just dont like the mother and wanted an excuse to sneer at her didnt you?

Oh yes! With the red end to “glow”. Pretend smoking .
9 is definitely not too young for sleepovers if they're happy to go . And i don't think mocktails are setting them up for a life of heavy drinking. Good luck with the teenage years …

My 9 year old has sips of wine from me sorry drip feed of the century!!!

So you allow your child, not even in double digits to consume actual alcohol, but a kiddie drink of squash with sweeties, dressed up to look a bit fancy and grown up is a problem?

Seriously? You let her have wine but are upset about another parent giving her juice in a fancy glass?

This place is nuts.

,🤣🤣🤣🤣

I have boys but I don't think make up, expensive skincare and crop tops are appropriate for a 9 year old on a regular basis. But each to their own and I wouldn't think anything bad about another parent who did that, it's just not what I'd do. Although the drinks sound fine and normal for that age. I did similar for my 9th or 10th birthday when I wanted a "grown up party". We still did all the usual party games and I wore my laura ashley dress with puffed sleeves but we had lemonade in wine glasses instead of the usual plastic cups. We loved it.

You clearly just hate the mother. The actual hypocrisy.

Waaaaaaah waaaaaaah waaaaaah my kid was served squash at a children’s birthday party. So inappropriate.

FFS, OP, lighten up. Kids like to pretend to be grown up. They had some fizzy drinks in plastic flutes. It was just a bit of harmless fun for a birthday and a way of making the drinks feel a bit more special.

As your dc heads into the teenage years, it's likely that there will be some real issues that you will actually need to think about. Save your energy for those and don't waste headspace fretting about an entirely innocent children's party.

You let your 9yo have sips of wine, but have an issue with sleepovers and squash in a champagne flute.

Buckle up, you’ve got a long road ahead of you!

Lol I just read you give her actual wine. Fucking hell, what’s wrong with you.

Nah, you can’t be serious. It’s just ytd most ridiculous thing I ever heard. And that’s going some with the nonsense spouted on here sometimes.

The squash cocktails are just the tip of the iceberg OP. They’ll be shooting up speedballs in an alley before you know it. Best to nip it in the bud before it’s too late

I think 9 yo is too young for sips of wine.

I feel guilty letting my 15 year old have the occasional cider.

But yep this is hypocritical. If you are allowing her alcohol at home how can you be serious about being 'concerned' about soft drinks served from champagne flutes?

Unless there is more drip feed to come.....

Good grief. I served a friend’s five year old a tequila sunrise without the tequila but in a fancy glass with a parasol.

it never occurred to me that ANYONE might consider this inappropriate.

Oh FFS

And yes, letting your 9yo have sips of wine is far more inappropriate than letting her drink squash out of a plastic flute. Given that you're so chilled about letting a young child alcohol, it seems odd that you're so concerned about the choice of a drink receptacle.