9 year old served ‘birthday drinks’ at sleepover

[Calpi]

My daughter recently attended a birthday sleepover. The girls are 9 years old which I thought was slightly on the young side so I was a little hesitant but agreed.

I have just seen some pictures and I really am not happy. The girls were given ‘birthday drinks’. They were only squash and obviously no alcohol was used but they were served in actual plastic flutes. The drink was bright pink with fizzy sweets in the glass but I’m not happy.

The mum in question parents very differently. Her 9 year old gets bought VERY expensive skincare products. And her daughter acts like a
full on teen - we’re talking crop tops, Stanley cups, skincare, TikTok dances, eyeshadow etc. I have been in the girl’s bedroom and she has a dressing table completely covered in drunk elephant etc. The mum is into that overconsumption stuff she sees online. Fine, parent how you want but I want my daughter to have a childhood and to not be adultified.

AIBU in thinking this was massively inappropriate? Why couldn’t they have just made milkshakes or smoothies? Or an ice cream sundae?

For goodness sake its only pink lemonade with sweets.

There is no law to say which drinks can be drunk from certain drinking vessels.

I must be an horrendous parent in your eyes….i let my nearly 4 year old have a mocktail on holiday….complete with little fancy umbrella and everything! That’s it! His childhood is over! 😱😭

YABU in my opinion.
Both my DD and DS were having sleepovers at age 9. Let them enjoy their softdrinks.

Goodness me. What a complete over reaction.

You need to chill out and accept you are the dominant influence in your dd's life, she may be exposed to different but generally harmless parenting styles, but if you are doing your job she will be able to understand the differences. Or you keep her insulated at home.

This will get much harder the older she gets!

Obviously there are times you will need to intervene, (like when you find out your dc has been watching inappropriate over 18 movies when they are only 12 🙈), but this isn't one of them.

You’re entitled to your opinion and feelings on this. I wouldn’t have any issue at all with it but as you do it’s best just to not let her attend any more sleepovers. Sleepovers were always a no go in our house until they were much older fir many reasons.

😂

OP, it feels like you don't particularly like the mum so you are looking for something to be offended at. You can't seriously be giving your 9 year old sips of real alcohol and being unhappy at squash in a mock champange glass? That's warped.

So you allow your 9 year old to drink wine but the birthday mum is out or order...

The birthday mum isn't the one who deserves the outrage.

I must of missed she was having sips of wine. I can’t really imagine that as most children find wine disgusting! Even I didn’t get into wine until my mid 20s lol

Real alcohol would be very shocking. Not pretend alcohol. It's just fun.

This is going to be in the Daily Mail isn't it?

😂

But you're the only one making that association, OP. To the kids it's just a sweet drink in a fancy glass.

I'm more astounded that your 9 year old asked for and got sips of wine. That seems far less age appropriate than soft drinks served in cute glasses at a birthday.

You've not read the OP's update, I guess?

Omg unclench. It's innocent fun.

What the hell have I just read? You think it's inappropriate that some kids were served fancy-looking soft drinks as a treat? Are kids only allowed to drink from a plain plastic beaker or something?

When I worked in pubs and bars that served food, and people came in to eat with kids, I always used to serve the kids' drinks in the fanciest possible way, so you'd have hated me. If you'd have ordered an orange juice for your child from me, I'd have served it in a goblet style glass with an orange slice on the rim, cherry on a stick, the lot. I also used to mix mocktails for kids as little free surprises.

It's a Mocktail, not a Long Island Iced Tea....save your pearls for kids who are neglected and abused

Everyone knows that Stanley cups are a gateway vessel to Spode.

In the real world OP, you know what this family are like and if you find all this to much in general, I think you should have not agreed to the sleepover in the first place.

You are being ridiculous.

In 2 years, you will not have a clue how her friends parents, parent, or have any idea of what shaped vestibule they serve "birthday drinks" from.

You need to get a grip.

Wow I’ve ruined my children 🤣

Mocktails…

Seriously what am I reading!!

This doesn't make sense, you are concerned about the glass, fizzy drinks being "birthday drinks" and yet you've gave a 9 year old actual alcohol? Wtaf!!

9 isn't young for a sleepover. We don't all parent the same nothing bad or illegal happened to your daughter. Out of interest if you knew all this in advance (except drinking from a flute) having been in the child's bedroom why did you give permission for her to stay over?
You have 2 choices really let go and relax a little or accept the fact sadly your daughter will probably lose her friendships if you want full control over what happens when she's out of your home.