12 year old dd reads for pleasure for on average an hour at. Aibu to think this is the norm?

[Cheezepizza]

BTW this is not a boasting post. I know more kids will read much more, I'm just asking out of curiosity as I would like her reading more now that winter is coming in.

My DD is 9 and it's completety normal for him to read 1 h/day. He likes books. It's better to read than waste time on mindless gaming or silly online videos. I'm concerned for the childrens' future in general. We've not had a generaltion yet when the majority of the kids spent most of their time on midless, low-quality passive entertainment.

Oh dear.

I loved reading as a kid - would read an average of 5 books a week. My mother often nagged me to do 'something else' as she thought it was bad for me, I did carry on.

I now love mindless gaming...

Completely agree with you. Staring at you tube videos & tik tok videos will not make kids tech savvy or prepare them for a future in tech based industry, quite the opposite!

My 8-year-old DD hardly ever wants to read other than at bedtime and then we can't tear her away 🤔

Tbh, I'm not really complaining as it's only been the last few months or so that she's actually got the reading bug, so despite how frustrating "one more chapter" is when she needs to clean her teeth, I'll take it 😁

You are both completely wrong, social media is part of the modern world, understanding content and how it is created etc, security, algorithms, AI are all useful things to know..we are not in the 1950's. as with anything, moderation is the key.

No amount of snooty , pompous posturing about how much your child reads is going to cancel out how important understanding the tech world is.

BTW this is not a boasting post

It is, though, isn't it? You know full well that an hour a day is a decent amount of time for a 12-year-old to be reading for fun.

I would like her reading more now that winter is coming in

Why? Is reading somehow more important in winter than summer?

Ultimately, reading for pleasure is a nice thing to do, if you enjoy it. But you can't make a child enjoy it and if you try to push her to read, she will start to see it as a chore. I speak as someone who gets through around 70-80 books a year and runs a book review site when I say that reading is a hobby. It's entertainment. Nobody should be forced to read more than they want to, any more than they should be forced to watch TV or listen to music or play a board game.

Clearly, literacy is important, but there are other ways of achieving a decent standard of literacy than reading fiction for pleasure.

Your kid likes reading for an hour or so. That's fine. Just leave her alone.

My 10 year old reads for 45 minutes before bed. I've phrased it so he thinks of it as "extra time" to stay up late before sleeping. He's gone through numerous books this year and thinks he's the one winning 🤣

Some kids don't like reading get over it. I did not read much at all when I was a child my sister read loads we were very different kids with very different interests. I did go out a lot and play but I also lost hours of my day watching videos on MTV which you could probably equate to mindless, low-quality passive entertainment. I was a child in the 80s this is nothing new. I do agree teenagers spend far too much time on their phones and that is a worry but I don't agree that they should all be reading books instead. I think it is physical social contact they need.

But we all learn that even though we are late to tech. Watching mindless YouTube shorts etc is brain numbing.
You are actually the one who is completely wrong. Social media is addictive, why do you think many the tech moguls in Silicon Valley don't allow their children tech devices? Because they know the effects!

@Alltheunreadbooks

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2024/jan/18/tech-workers-kids-social-media-screen-time

Which is why I said ' In moderation'.

Some YouTube shorts are mindless, good mindless and bad mindless. If it's how a child likes to spend some leisure time, then that is OK, believe it or not.

You are no better a parent, and your child is no better than another child who doesn't read or watches YouTube.

It's just pure arrogance and snobbery to suggest otherwise.

Just a thought has she friends who are into reading? Would a bookclub work?

My ten year old son has a lovely group of friends who love reading, it started early with captain underpants. They've moved on to monty python and Fawlty towers, and have formed a bookclub.

There is about 16 of them in the class that read a book have a few treats /pizza and chat about the book. Now we know they are copying their parents who have a (wine) book club but if it keeps them reading anything I and the other parents are happy to host .

There is no such thing as 'the norm'.

People have different goals for their children.
Some children, like adults, do not enjoy reading and that is fine.
Some do enjoy reading which is also fine.

What you should do is continue to encourage your childs hobby without putting pressure on it, and if their hobby changes then allow that because we all go through phases of likes and dislikes and all that is important is that we are enjoying what we do.

The tech argument is challenging. I don't equate MTV music videos with the absolute crap on YouTube. There is a lot that gets through the child friendly controls.

I do allow it under supervision on the TV. My son loves coding, creating stop start animation etc so plenty of tech and digital skills. They are important.

I know I am fortunate as he is in a large grouping of similar mindset peer parents. So consider myself lucky that I don't have pushback. I can appreciate its a different space when their peers have different outlooks.

You don't think children should be doing a range of activities?

Too much of anything isn't good. I know, I was the kind of child who would start a book before school, spend break and lunch reading and stay up late to finish it. I have a scar on my head from tripping up on usual walk home with my nose in a book. You can get obsessive about anything and when you withdraw from real life, that's not especially healthy.

And I wasn't reading fluff. My history teacher once mentioned the cultural revolution in China and I brought in a stack of historical fiction on the subject for her to read the next day, she borrowed them and told my parents I was the most well-read person she'd ever met. However, I probably knew more about the cultural revolution in China than I did about my peers, which is not normal for a 14 year old.

Up to an hour of reading every day is already considerably more than most adults spend on their hobbies. If you need to force it, it's not "for pleasure" any more. There are other worthwhile activities in life that aren't reading.

I have no idea what it being winter has to do with it- my focus for my children in winter is trying to make sure they still have enough opportunities to go outside, not trying to make them stay inside.

Any reading for pleasure is good. I'm an avid reader but unfortunately DD is not. I encourage but don't force it as it kind of removes the "for pleasure" aspect

But reading is the most important thing for children's development, aside from the obvious factors (parenting, sufficient resources etc..). I would read 'til i was unable to (many hours a day, every day from....8?) but when i was a child there was not youtube, PS, phones tablets, few tv stations, no on demand etc.. so my oldest (DS11) probably reads an hour a week, if even.. Well justified humblebrag!

None of my three boys read for pleasure - I would be more than happy to see them read for an hour a day. I devour books - my dream is to see them get lost in a book. Middle boy still managed to get the highest grade in his year for English GCSE (9) 😂

If you specify a time she will find it a chore and possibly give up

Aren't you the lucky one! I used to read an awful lot and ended up with the family curse of short sight. Suggest you advise her to look up regularly and focus on something a long way off for a while.
You might look up eye exercises on a health site as well.

Your child gives me hope for the future. 👏👏

I'm not sure this is true - that reading is the most important part of a child's development.

My 11 year old rarely reads and neither does my almost ten year old. When I was a child I read all night. I’m not going to make them read if they don’t want to. Reading is for pleasure and I read for pleasure now as an adult. My brother who was two years younger than me never picked up a book as a child and he’s done better than I have career wise. Don’t stress about it

Sorry but this IS boastful. My gues is that you’ll privately judge all those who say their kids don’t read ever and pay yourself on the back. To answer your question my 12 year old girl reads everything (at least an hour every day which I struggle to keep up with) she’s also addicted to Minecraft and some Harry Potter game plus binge watches a lot of crap cartoons. She cooks, does sports, is a student leader etc and is in fact is very interested in a whole heap of things she comes across in life. Literally what difference does that make to you? Apart from wanting to seemingly gloat? If you want to make a point about the dangers of screens and social media (which I wholeheartedly agree with you on) raise that as an issue rather than an attempt to boast and be quietly smug. And if that’s not what you intended by this post, I’m sorry but that’s how it comes across.

I don't think you are boasting at all, it's good that she does read. Reading can be hit and miss with children. My daughter is 9 and a half, and can read for 30-45 minutes, she will read on the car, on the bus, on the train or in bed. She enjoys reading a lot.