I did the right thing, didn’t I?

[ChocBanana]

I’m a school teacher. About a month ago, I made an anonymous referral to SS about the child over the road who we hear screaming day and night. The day I reported it he was screaming “please don’t leave me! Don’t do that mummy!”

I have just had the mum knock on my door asking if it was me who reported her because SS have just been to visit. I denied it because I don’t want to cause any issues, I want her to get help. It turns out the child is SEN and often screams out with no context.

I asked the DSL at work if I should report it, he said “you must. If something happens and you didn’t it calls into question your whole career. What if it was a child here and you ignored it to keep the peace?”

I just messaged OH to tell him she’s been round and he said “serves you right for sticking your oar in.”

I did the right thing though, didn’t I? I was right to report it. Safeguarding is everyone’s responsibility.

*And before everyone jumps in to say “why didn’t you offer to help her”, don’t pretend you would have done so. I don’t know the woman and every time I have said hello she blanks me. She’s not going to ask me in to babysit.

Yes you did the right thing OP.

You done it out of genuine concern.

You know you did the right thing. Why would you doubt both your and the DSL professional experience for a throw away comment from DH?

Children with SEN are abused to so it doesn't really matter if she shouts out random things, one time it could be for real. You report your concerns and pass them on to the relevant body to make further decisions.

You did the right thing. It's good that there doesn't seem to be an issue but you had no way of knowing that.

You did the right thing. SS are there to help and support - she would be offered additional help she may not have relapsed she can access.

Your husband should be ashamed.

Children with SEN can also be abused children. You weren’t to know the situation and it wasn’t your job to investigate. You did the right thing by reporting it and hopefully any support needed can be put in place

As a screaming child myself, whom the neighbours undoubtedly heard, thank you for reporting it.

You had a concern, you reported it, it was checked out and it was identified the child has SEN so SS can make the decision as to no further assistance needed or support if necessary. No harm, no foul.
Your colleague is correct, imagine something happened and you hadn't reported it. You would be struggling with your conscience.

I don't think you did anything wrong.

Of course you did the right thing, and your dh sounds like a bit of an idiot, tbh.

You did the right thing, don't let anyone tell you different.
How many times do we read about children who could have been saved from abuse if people had "stuck their oar in" and reported their concerns.

If you want to reassure yourself just read the awful story of Sara Sharif. You did the right thing!

You followed your conscience and did the right thing.

As long as SS are not making her life a misery, interfering, threatening to take away her child, you should not worry at all.

Going over and offering to help would have been nosy and interfering. I think the mum would have resented that greatly.

Better an offended innocent family than another child dying from abuse and neglect.

If in doubt then yes always report… but my 2 year old will often tell us to leave the room at bedtime repeatedly and then scream ‘come back don’t leave me mummy!’ (which we do, we just stand outside momentarily) so I wouldn’t have based on what you said!

Of course you did the right thing. Ignore the arse of a husband. Let's hope he doesn't need a bit of support or reassurance any time soon from you.

This is exactly why all local authorities have an anonymous safeguarding report line.

You did the right thing.
You had concerns over a child's safety and you told the appropriate service.
It has been investigated and the child is safe.

The world needs more people like you, who don't turn a blind eye or think things are someone else's problem.

You did the right thing

Your husband is not very nice to you

I can't get past a teacher saying a child is SEN. I'm not being pedantic but language DOES matter.

But moving on, yes you did the right thing.

The child might be absolutely fine, but you're not to know that.

Of course you did the right thing, the mother might even have better access to support now it's been flagged. Your OH sounds like a fool!

Look up Sara Sharif. I bet her family's neighbours now wish they had reported what they had heard.

You did the right thing. Your H is an arse!

Of course you did the right thing. Your ignorant DH needs to understand that too many children have been let down by people who could have acted doing nothing.

Even if SS are ‘making her life a misery’ you still did the right thing.

Better to report and be mistaken than to keep quiet and be right.

You’re a mandated reporter. You had to.
I don’t like SS because I don’t think they are fit for purpose. Whole thing needs changing. But whilst it’s all that’s available, you had to report to them.

I reported my neighbour and she asked if it was me. It was awful but it needed to be done. It's better to report and be wrong than risk a child being abused.

This. So many people heard her and did nothing. You did the right thing. Don't let anyone make you doubt that.