Found escort website on husbands history

[Piney15]

Found a escort website on my husbands search history with local areas entered! .. completely taken back .. we have been together almost 13 years, 2 children and 1 on the way... and happy!! Litrally happy as can be. ive checked bank, photos, social accounts etc. And I can't find anything further than this other than 1 porn search after the search for the escort website vivastreets!! Ergh just need some support advice on this

@HoppyFish Why are you so desperate to normalise OP's DH's behaviour?

It's not normal behaviour for a man in a committed relationship to search for escorts. It is naive to believe any man doing so isn't actually intending to use a sex worker.

Bollocks. They look because they want a shag. Men really don't like not being the centre of attention. The amount of them that leave within the first two years of their child being born, is horrendous.

Don't listen to this one OP. Listen to her language. And look at her username! How does she know some aren't just window shopping? Imagine how many visits those sites get. Only a fraction of them will turn into actual visits. Just think about it.

I'm an ex sexworker, I know what I'm talking about.

Did you advertise on the internet?

Just window shopping for human bodies to wank over, or to rent for a shag. Either shows a pretty despicable attitude to women.

OP, what prompted you to review his search history in the first place?

I can't think of anyone worse to advise on this matter! Just because most of your clients will have been married men, it doesn't mean that most married men use prostitutes. A high percentage of the men you saw were the very small percentage of the very worst men. It's given you a very biased view of them and clouded your thinking. Right, I've got to go to sleep now. Keep calm, think rationally and good luck OP!

Well actually I would think for most women finding their partner/ husband/ boyfriend had been searching for escorts it would be a catastrophe. It would be the end of their relationship. And it wouldn't be down to the woman. The end of the relationship would be solely down to their partner not only seeking sexual gratification outside their relationship but being prepared to buy that gratification.

You talk about " man haters" on this site. It would probably be accurate to say it is men's unacceptable behaviour that women on this site hate.With good reason.

Again you are defending misogynistic entitled male behaviour. Why?

They actually weren't, but that's none of your business.

@Piney15
whether he was browsing or actually going to pay an escort for sex, he's married to you, you're pregnant, and his behaviour is not okay.

As hard as it is don't confront him. He will deny deny deny.
Get your proof (you already have a lot but he will say he was curious and only looked).
Get the STI done and fingers crossed all will be OK.
HOWEVER! You could call his bluff. Say your gyne called, your blood tests from your recent ante natal appointment show insert sti name That the ONLY way you caught this was by him.
And watch his reaction?

All unsubstantiated. You don't know that he is seeking sexual gratification outside the marriage (he is not "wanking over" his phone (he isn't 14)) and you don't know that he is prepared to buy it.

I don’t agree with this. I search all sorts on my phone (nothing illegal or sexually weird) but it doesn’t mean I’m going to use what I searched. I’ve been googling an expensive facial treatment, searched where available locally to me. I’m not going to get it done but was curious. Searched London hotels last night, again just bored and thinking might be nice for a trip sometime.
i don’t think you can jump to conclusions yet.

OP is quite understandably devastated by finding her DH has been searching for escorts. Which is why she started this thread.
I'm not going to derail the thread any more by arguing with you over your incomprehensible defence of men searching for escorts.

HoppyFish, are you the OP’s DH?

Ok, yes, OP must be devastated. But there is no need to make things worse by saying if he went on this website then he MUST have been visiting escorts. Even saying searching FOR escorts not rational. I am suggesting OP keeps a rational head, doesn't jump to conclusions or act rashly. Bear in mind much of the advice on this thread is likely biased. OP went into a marriage agreement and brought children into the world. She needs to consider the long term future of her children before jumping to conclusions and doing anything drastic. One last thing OP: I've heard that most men who use escorts use a spare 'burner phone' to avoid being caught. So the fact you've found this on his normal phone may well be a good sign.

Whilst we’re all hoping this isn't as bad as it appears, asking a pregnant person whose DH is searching for escorts, if they are having less sex due to said pregnancy is an incredibly low thing to do, so don’t get “you’re all man haters” when thats the worst thing thats been posted on the thread.

Well it certainly doesn't sound like you're all hoping this isn't as bad as it appears. Most people are trying to convince OP that the worst outcome has CERTAINLY happened! I think that's a pretty terrible thing to do myself. The consequences of which might be dire.

You’ve called out other people on the thread for catastrophising. Perhaps reflect on how your own post was received. Horrible thing to ask and as if that has any relevance to what has or hasn’t happened here. That’s why you’re being called an apologist.

They said they were going to sleep several posts ago as well.

Sorry but this is such bullshit, they don't look for curiosity and read reviews!

I did this when I found out about UKpunting on here!

Oh dear. I wondered why Mumsnet was referred to as a nest of vipers. Now I know... I know it must be upsetting (sorry OP), but I am trying to keep OP rational amongst the repeating advice that if he looked on a Vivastreet escort page he MUST have visited escorts! All matters need to be considered if relevant. I will leave you to continue this discussion without me. Sadly I think I know the direction it will take. I know this must be awful OP, especially given the circumstances. And sorry if an earlier question was in bad taste. All I'll say is don't do anything rash just yet. Good luck.

I don’t think anyone is suggesting she walk out right now while phoning a solicitor and should never speak to him again. But you’re presenting a very naive world view.

There is so much free and accessible porn and sexual imagery on the internet, if he wanted something to wank over there are many many many other options that aren’t Googling what I assume is his local area + escorts.

If he was looking for a news story, again you’d see it as ‘local woman + escort + localtown’ and then probably a click on a story about it. Not him just going straight to the escort website.

OP needs to assume the worst until she has more facts.

OP you have 2 choices, pretend it didn't happen and it was an innocent curiosity or end it. .. OK maybe he was just getting off over the idea of it and maybe you are OK with that.