Risking a flaming but jealous of those on weight loss injections

[Notmyfinesthours]

I’ve specifically not put this in the weight loss section as I’d rather hear from those who aren’t dieting or thinking about it. Might help me find perspective better.

I am not overweight. I never have been.
I have however had what feels like a lifetime of making sure this is the case.

I suspect many women feel like me. Brought up to fear being fat or greedy or ‘let myself go’ as if it were the worst sin.

Ive skirted close to or actually been in the midst of orthorexia for most of my adult life. Always saying no to pudding, finding the latest food that will fill me up but not have too many calories and fixating on it before I find the next one. Exercising most days, fitting it in by missing lie ins or nights in front of the fire.

Fretting in pregnancy, menopause and any ill health leading to immobility that it might trigger weight gain.

you get the picture? Self flagellation is big driven by an instilled fear of being fat given to many in my generation (I’m 58) (and yes I know I should address this first- I am trying but the media doesn’t help)

Several of my friends and family are big eaters, always seem to have the toastie and cake when we are out and by their own admissions do little exercise. They have often jokingly talked about being slimmer but say they like food too much and ‘have no willpower’ and can’t be bothered to deny themselves for the sake of a few dress sizes.

I know it’s more complex than that but they basically enjoy life in the way it should be enjoyed to my mind and accept they will be a bit larger bodied. I’ve actually always really admired this as an attitude or at least been a bit jealous of it.

But with the new weight loss injections several of them have dropped weight significantly and are so slim and delighted.

I just feel so cheated. Like I’ve been so careful for so long and they haven’t but they get to be slim just with an injection.

I know it’s more complicated, I know it costs them money, might have risks etc but it’s clear so many celebs are doing the same and it feels like it’s not going to be more commonplace.

Why is this making me feel cheated and am I just an awful person?

What is a pure food, Ive never heard this phrase.

The amount of people constantly banging on about UPFs I suppose they all have this condition.

Mmm, I get what you’re saying, and yes it’s honest but so many of ‘these people’ on weight loss medication have spent their lives being controlled by food too. They’ve thought about what they eat or don’t eat constantly, they’ve wished they had the will power to stick to diets and exercise but they been constantly bombarded by food noise and a cycle of restriction and then overeating and disappointment and shame and judgement from literally everywhere; health professionals, peers, strangers on the street, the media, pretty much everybody everywhere.
I speak from personal experience btw, I have been dangerously underweight in my teens, I have struggled with a negative or even dysphoric body image. I have managed for many years to stay on just the slightly plump side of slim by saying no to food, cycling diets, fasting, everything. Then I just lost my fight and over the course of 10 years post children and mid perimenopause, I managed to put on 5 stones. I still said no to desserts when I felt judged for my weight, I also said fuck it plenty of times and had the toastie and the cake when I was around friends I felt wouldn’t judge.
I’m now on weight loss injections, it’s not an easy fix or without its issues, cost, side effects, more judgment from others! But, I’ve lost 3 stone and o feel like I’m in control again. I still can’t eat the cake or the toastie and there’s still a lot of judgement for other people but I feel like I might be building a healthy relationship with food for the first time ever.

I don't understand "weren't you raised not to be jealous?"... Jealousy is a horrible feeling that nobody wants feel but sometimes we do! It isn't a case of choosing to feel that way...

Doctor here. What your friends may not be mentioning is the unpleasant side effects e.g. gastrointestinal, that they may be experiencing. Also, often, people often put the weight back on when they finish the injections.

Well parents can support and prevent that type of framing of the world, were you brought up to be grateful for what you had, grateful and feeling ok about yourself

People who are petty and jealous over others normally are not very happy with themselves. Im ok, you're ok.

You must have heard of this. This is how some people dont get overly consumed with jealousy, particularly about things that dont affect them. There are different contexts where one could be jealous about something that affects them greatly, but someone else, losing weight a different way to you, that is somewhat irrational to feel jealousy for that.

Hi, I have been obsessed with my weight all my life like you, and worked really hard to stay slim. I started on HRT and put on 4 stone in six months. I felt horrendous honestly because of my weight worry issues. I tried really hard to lose the weight using my original methods but they didn’t work any more. So I started the injections and have now lost the four stone again. It definitely wasn’t easy though. I couldn’t eat junk food or cake, as the medication only worked with a very restrictive diet for me. I wish it was a magic injection where I could eat any old thing and be thin but I am not naturally tthin so had to work just as hard as before. I get how you feel but it isn’t how it works for a lot of people.

I hope you will recover from the disordered eating now, it must be very tough.

You explain well what the difference is when food become an addiction, you are looking for the feeling of being very full after a meal to calm yout anxiety and its a circle.

In people without issues feeling too full is not nice, I personally don't like it, don't like either feel hungry for too long or feel too full.
I am wondering what happens when people using these drugs reach their target BMI.
Once you are off the drugs I assume the anxiety/ coping mechanism with food is still there? The addiction will need to be addressed while on those jabs through therapy. Otherwise there is no miracle cure.

I haven’t read all the comments so forgive me if others have pointed this out to you - those who lose a lot of weight with these injections will have a lot of losse skin to contend with - you won’t.

Perhaps reading the thread is useful. Having lost 6st and only half a stone to go, in my fifties, I have no loose skin. Or a flabby neck. Many people I know losing weight this way also don’t have the loose skin. Some people who’ve lost weight the ‘traditional’ way DO have loose skin.

Speed of weight loss, exercise/weight training and genetics dictate those things.

I’m jealous but too scared of the side effects.

Yes, you are being unreasonable because your friends have done absolutely nothing wrong. I understand and can empathize with you because I know how painful jealousy can be. I've envied people before.
The best thing to do, I believe, is to compliment them on how wonderful they look and try to feel happy for them. You can feel happy for yourself that you are thin, too! Plus, you never know whether you might gain weight someday and the weight loss drug might help you, also.

My best friend has lost 5 stone on these injections and has no loose skin, she looks amazing.

You realise this is feeding into and supporting the idea that women are in competition with each other to look as attractive as possible, in order to have status in our society. You're reassuring the OP that her jealousy is justified, but it's ok because she will still have the advantage over those lower status obese people even when they're slim, because they'll have loose skin everywhere and she of course will have perfect skin.

The horror of the loose skin. It really tickles me on these threads. Its constant

Dont worry about your stroke risk, cardiac risk, mobility, early death, just thank god you dont have turkey neck!!

Genetics dictates whether you get loose skin, not your method of loss, not your speed of loss.

To be fair, even now my boobs hang down to me knees. I am rather looking forward to them being a bit more empty - at least then I can roll them up into my bra 😂

Take heart. I have been involved in the weight loss/fitness field for years. Injections are just a short term palliative. The weight returns. Exercise will reshape your body but only persistent diet does the trick.

Yes mine are like little sad pitta breads now, empty little flat things. A good bra and a nice outfit and no one would ever know Im living with the daily horror of the 'loose skin'!!!

That’s it. Don’t worry op - all those fatties won’t be able to resist shoving cake in their hole once off the jab and will pile the weight back on and the slim people can feel smug once again!

how nice

It's bizarre and fascinating, this urge that so many seem to have to reassure the OP that obese people have no escape and that they are doomed to be unattractive whatever they do.

But of course … because those who have been ‘involved in the weight-loss/fitness field’ may no longer have a revenue stream if this is actually as successful as the study of 42K mounjaro and Ozempic/Wegovy users I cited above.

After all, they need fatties to stay fat, whereas the NHS (and all UK tax payers and NHS users) really need to decrease the cost of obesity and it’s impact on public services.

Surely you can't have been involved with many people who have taken wegovy and stopped it?

Quite.

If you really have been in the weight loss/fitness field for years, firstly I feel sorry for anyone who's worked with you given your level of empathy, and secondly - you would know that all diets/weight loss methods have a very low level of success if the person doing them returns to their old ways. In that way, all diets are "palliative"

People talk about rebound weight and loose skin as if these are only associated with weight loss drugs when they can be a consequence of all diets.

Exactly, I'm in my 50s and I've lost nearly 9 stone on Ozempic and then Wegovy. I have very little loose skin. I've seen people who are much younger and have lost far less weight, who have far more. I clearly have very elastic skin.

I've also totally overhauled my diet, worked on my mindset and heavy weight trained four times a week while I waited for the magic fat-melting drugs to shrink my lazy, fat arse...