Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my flexible working request will not unreasonable?

237 replies

NameChangedOct · 10/10/2024 08:21

Hello! I returned from maternity leave 3 months ago. I’m full time, but had accrued a LOT of annual leave so have been using this to take every Friday off for the rest of the year, essentially working a 4 day week. From January I was hoping to request a permanent change, 4 days for 80% pay.

However, my manager is saying it’s really difficult for the team/business under my current working arrangement and may not be sustainable permanently. I do appreciate that the work I do comes in (with little notice) as tasks/mini-projects that take 2-3 days and are quite time sensitive. So usually I will start something on a Thursday and unable to finish it, I have to hand it over to a colleague (which I think is fine, only slightly less efficient, or if the colleague can’t get to it then it waits until Monday which delays the output beyond our usual times, but it’s hardly life or death). Everyone else on my team works full time, even those with young kids.

I’ve not put a formal request in but AIBU thinking the above is not a good enough reason for them to refuse this as a legal right as a parent.

i really love my job, colleagues and flexibility (I can WFH), but I also need a day off to spend with my little one.

OP posts:
ohidoliketobe · 10/10/2024 09:04

I had Thursdays off in previous role for this very reason. Mon- Weds were longer days, and then Fridays were my 'mop up' day where I got everything finished I needed to for the week. Worked well.

Barney16 · 10/10/2024 09:06

What you have described seems to me to be unreasonable enough for your request to be refused. You may have better luck requesting a different day if everything comes in on a Thursday and always you have to hand the work over.

Demonhunter · 10/10/2024 09:09

So a colleague who works 5 days and also has young kids, has to pick up your work because you want a day off each week with your young kid, and you think it's justifiable? Have I got that right?

Gr8bolsoffyre · 10/10/2024 09:09

They don’t need a strong reason. Although it does sound like there is a fairly strong one tbh. Many places just don’t want part timers. It’s wrong but you’re probably not going to win this one.

Can DH not change his work to help a bit more. I guess not, they never can 😂

CostelloJones · 10/10/2024 09:10

I have a Wednesday off and it really breaks the week up nicely. Would this work better?

I am all for flexible working for everyone, but would also not be happy if a colleague regularly took on projects that they couldn’t finish and then handed them to me when they were time sensitive. It seems unreasonable for you to brush that off as no big deal.

CandiedPrincess · 10/10/2024 09:12

A one day delay on the tasks I pick up isn’t the end of the world. It wouldn’t be the same client each time and most are understanding.

It is if there is a SLA in place. A one-off delay, fine but weekly as routine? I don't think that is acceptable as a provider or a client.

You need to demonstrate that your day off wouldn't affect your colleagues or the business - and from what you said, it affects both. I think they would be very reasonable to turn down this request.

itwasnevermine · 10/10/2024 09:12

That's a perfectly legitimate business reason to deny.

You don't really seem to care that your actions are impacting the rest of your team? You say the rest of them have small children, are they now working under higher levels of stress because of your 4 day week? It seems rather unfair that they have to deal with that when you go off, and then say "it's hardly life or death"

Waitformetoarrive · 10/10/2024 09:13

I would decline the request as unreasonable even under the expected flexible working changes. Work being handed off to someone else or being held over to the following week causing on going issues is very unreasonable.

CostelloJones · 10/10/2024 09:14

you say you really like your team but it doesn’t sound like you are paying them much consideration.

redskydarknight · 10/10/2024 09:14

Cobblersorchard · 10/10/2024 08:46

I don’t know why mumsnet are such bitches about flexible working.

@NameChangedOct it entirely depends on your sector, in mine flexible working requests are almost always accommodated in some form.

You have demonstrated by doing a 4 day week how it works and what the impacts are. You could offer an alternative day for example perhaps a Weds would have less impact on deliverables. Alternatively you could agree to do it for 1 year with a review before making it perm.

I’m a senior manager doing 0.81 FTE myself and I have approved hundreds of requests in my career. About half I have needed to reach a compromise but there’s only been 2 I refused completely.

Employers are expected to find ways to accommodate, not ways to refuse. But given the ridiculous comments above you’d think you were asking for something completely unreasonable.

I don't think anyone is being bitchy. People are pointing out that there is a legitimate business reason to refuse OP's proposed request and suggests she rethinks/comes up with other options.

OP has demonstrated by doing a 4 day week that it doesn't work for the business. I don't think that you as a senior manager would approve a flexible working request that would cause delays beyond the normal deadlines for clients?

PleaseAskSomeoneWhoGivesAFuck · 10/10/2024 09:14

Cobblersorchard · 10/10/2024 08:46

I don’t know why mumsnet are such bitches about flexible working.

@NameChangedOct it entirely depends on your sector, in mine flexible working requests are almost always accommodated in some form.

You have demonstrated by doing a 4 day week how it works and what the impacts are. You could offer an alternative day for example perhaps a Weds would have less impact on deliverables. Alternatively you could agree to do it for 1 year with a review before making it perm.

I’m a senior manager doing 0.81 FTE myself and I have approved hundreds of requests in my career. About half I have needed to reach a compromise but there’s only been 2 I refused completely.

Employers are expected to find ways to accommodate, not ways to refuse. But given the ridiculous comments above you’d think you were asking for something completely unreasonable.

So you are happy for clients to be inconvenienced and colleagues having to pick up extra work.
And having employees who can make unilateral decisions on what is a matter of life or death in relation to deadlines
Please reveal where you work so we can avoid sending our business, or being an employee who has to do everyone else's work

askmenow · 10/10/2024 09:15

You need to find another job.

Your colleagues will become resentful at your level on entitlement given they're handed work you've been unable to complete in your working hours. Your manager has flagged it's a problem.

MichaelandKirk · 10/10/2024 09:17

I am afraid that they are bound to refuse your request. Can you not see that messing clients around and expecting them to understand that projects will be delayed because you feel you are entitled to spend time with your child is a terrible reason to jusify what you are asking for!

And as for expecting your collegues to pick it up - well of course they wont mind too...

Coolblur · 10/10/2024 09:18

You have a legal right to request flexible working. Your employer can refuse if it adversely affects the business' needs. They are already telling you it does so they have grounds and more than enough evidence to refuse. While that may be disappointing, your choice is stay there on your pre-baby working hours, look for a new job that better fits your life, or if the issue is childcare, perhaps your partner could request flexible working instead.

Bluevelvetsofa · 10/10/2024 09:18

Ultimately, the employer must do what is best for the business- the business that employs you and pays you.

The employer will want to ensure that business thrives, clients are happy and employees are productive. Not sure your request enables that.

itwasnevermine · 10/10/2024 09:19

Coolblur · 10/10/2024 09:18

You have a legal right to request flexible working. Your employer can refuse if it adversely affects the business' needs. They are already telling you it does so they have grounds and more than enough evidence to refuse. While that may be disappointing, your choice is stay there on your pre-baby working hours, look for a new job that better fits your life, or if the issue is childcare, perhaps your partner could request flexible working instead.

OP hasn't mentioned childcare as an issue. Just wanting a day off in the week

CautiousLurker · 10/10/2024 09:20

So usually I will start something on a Thursday and unable to finish it, I have to hand it over to a colleague (which I think is fine, only slightly less efficient, or if the colleague can’t get to it then it waits until Monday which delays the output beyond our usual times…

There’s the business justification for declining your request right there - the business is suffering because of your absences every Friday. It may not seem important to you, but the business feels that the way it is perceived by clients when ‘output is delayed’ is an issue. As a fellow employee, it would also seriously piss me off to be continually having to pick up half finished jobs from a colleague who choses to take a day off each week - it’s never just ‘finishing’ them, is it? It requires forensically back tracking through your work to see what you have done and what still needs to be done - it’s a huge wast of a person’s time and impact their efficiency. As fellow parents I am sure they were amenable to this as a short-term/temporary arrangement while you find your feet as a new parent, but permanently they clearly shouldn’t have to. A FT hybrid/WFT arrangement would probably have been considered, though.

What I read here is a person unable to see their impact upon their colleagues or the business. Not exactly a team player, are you?

toomuchfaff · 10/10/2024 09:21

Is the Friday the major issue?

One colleague I used to work with used to work 4 days but her day was Wednesday, that way she was away from little on only 2 days at a time.

If the Friday is a big issue due to weekend as well, would Wednesday work better therefore increasing chances of 4 days a week

itwasnevermine · 10/10/2024 09:23

CautiousLurker · 10/10/2024 09:20

So usually I will start something on a Thursday and unable to finish it, I have to hand it over to a colleague (which I think is fine, only slightly less efficient, or if the colleague can’t get to it then it waits until Monday which delays the output beyond our usual times…

There’s the business justification for declining your request right there - the business is suffering because of your absences every Friday. It may not seem important to you, but the business feels that the way it is perceived by clients when ‘output is delayed’ is an issue. As a fellow employee, it would also seriously piss me off to be continually having to pick up half finished jobs from a colleague who choses to take a day off each week - it’s never just ‘finishing’ them, is it? It requires forensically back tracking through your work to see what you have done and what still needs to be done - it’s a huge wast of a person’s time and impact their efficiency. As fellow parents I am sure they were amenable to this as a short-term/temporary arrangement while you find your feet as a new parent, but permanently they clearly shouldn’t have to. A FT hybrid/WFT arrangement would probably have been considered, though.

What I read here is a person unable to see their impact upon their colleagues or the business. Not exactly a team player, are you?

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

Plus it's usually just easier to start it over again because your work styles are different, so then it's less billable time and it means the company is paying two members of staff and only being able to charge of one staff member's work.

Bringautumnnights · 10/10/2024 09:24

How about having 2 half days? That way you're still working 5 days, still getting time with your DC?

Or look for a new job?

DeireadhFomhair · 10/10/2024 09:25

NameChangedOct · 10/10/2024 08:47

Oh I was hoping for a Friday for DS’s routine, but thinking about it different day - monday or Wednesday might work better for them, as I could finish things in the same week. I’ll chat to them.

I used to take Wednesdays, and it was a great day actually. Only ever 2 days in a row in work, able to catch up on work over the course of the week. Plus it's less busy at shops etc... so that was always good 😁

DoreenonTill8 · 10/10/2024 09:25

Coolblur · 10/10/2024 09:18

You have a legal right to request flexible working. Your employer can refuse if it adversely affects the business' needs. They are already telling you it does so they have grounds and more than enough evidence to refuse. While that may be disappointing, your choice is stay there on your pre-baby working hours, look for a new job that better fits your life, or if the issue is childcare, perhaps your partner could request flexible working instead.

This!! I think people are misinterpreting the new laws as 'ah ha!! Now you HAVE to give me what I want!'.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 10/10/2024 09:27

If they turn it down think you might need to request another flexible working pattern eg compressed hours so that you still work the same hours but get a day off. So if you work an hour longer on Monday- Thursday would that give you enough time to finish anything urgent? Or could you have Wednesday as your day off? Or two half days?

Cobblersorchard · 10/10/2024 09:27

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Anxioustealady · 10/10/2024 09:28

Sorry if someone's already said this, but could you do job sharing? Maybe you could do Monday to Wednesday and another colleague Wednesday to Friday (0.6 or more if you did long days, 1 day overlap to catch up)? So if a job came in Wednesday/Thursday its their responsibility, Friday/Monday it's yours. Tuesday shared.