How much do you need to earn for 3 kids?

[Allthegoodnamesaregonegone]

When you don’t live in London and have very average expenses?

for arguments sake, I googled and saw the average mortgage is £1400
average heating for 4/5 people is £200 a month (British Gas website)

assume no ‘bad debts’ and no private school

id love another kid, if possible, but I do see on here often on the cost of a third and that being a large factor, so I’d like to understand what is the amount people think you need to earn pre tax to live comfortably with 3.

Because I don’t believe in faith schools or because they’re Islamic schools?

because you don’t have the money

Firstly, that’s rude. Secondly theres a distinction between 3k a term and 3k a year, seeing as I can pay my current childcare bill (and paid my historic one) roughly 7k and 10k annually, i would be able to afford to send my current children to a fee paying school that costs £3k a year. Even 3 kids.

would I chose to? Unlikely- as I said I don’t agree with faith schools and actually private schools as a whole.

3k a term (9k a year) that’s another question.

huh?

You said that £3k a term was “prohibitive”

You!

yes a term, not year!

i said I could afford 3k a year but not a term… that’s in the post you just quoted

i said

i would be able to afford to send my current children to a fee paying school that costs £3k a year. Even 3 kids

i looked at them and then decided it was cost prohibitive as it was £3k a term.

as for £3k… a year for a private school? tbh i didn’t notice you were saying a year. I thought £3k a term was incredibly low for any private school i’ve been aware of.

So i didn’t clock you were referring to £3k… a year, because, well i can’t fathom it!

a private school open to everyone for £3k a year. Wow!

I later said that was the cheapest non denominational private school but I’d seen some faith private schools for 3k a year…

There’s a question of target market too and how open is a minority faith school to non community members, whilst it may be open in the very literal sense, I can’t imagine too many non Muslims for instance sending their child to an Islamic faith school

You said you aren’t considering private schooling because prohibitive so seems bit daft for us to be discussing

i was just intrigued by £3k term
£3k a year? can’t understand how they can even exist tbh!

Good luck whatever you decide re third op

I’d imagine as they are faith schools, it’s going to be subsided by a religious organisation.

I am genuinely interested…. coul you post a link to one? £3k a year to someone who’s currently shelling out £17.2k….. a term! (thankfully with ex husband and both in secondary) is jaw dropping!

I had a quick look and cheapest i could find was £8.5k a year and you have to pass a series of tests, one of which is islamic studies

DH earns 28k - 4DC in our house (two teens, one will be an adult next spring but he already has a part time job with the local authority so has his own income).

@Vettrianofan do you earn anything? What are your accommodation costs?

No, I am an OU student whilst DC are all in school.

@Vettrianofan do you have a mortgage? I can't imagine 6 people living off that one salary.

No, that was paid off years ago.

We are in receipt of various benefits like UC, ADP, CDP, SCP, CB and CA, which tops up the income so we are not really struggling. We are always careful with money.

I’m not going to post a link as it’s outing to where I live, so you’re just going to have to take my word for it.

@Vettrianofan so you're not really living on a single salary of £28k at all!

Every little helps. No idea how many thousands extra we are in receipt of but DH salary isn't huge so are claiming what we are entitled to.

I'm not suggesting you're not entitled to claim. I'm saying that it's really disingenuous to say you are living on a single salary of 28k when actually you are receiving a large benefit top up. The OP is asking what is a realistic sun to bring up 3 children on and may not be entitled to any top up.

It’s all too subjective to answer. Obviously the more people there are everyone gets a smaller sliver of resources available. If you are desperate for a third you will do it.

We considered it but were very pleased
we stopped at two. We have a great dynamic and have been able to do so much with them as a family a third would have hampered that. Also when you out of the baby hunger years yours hormones drop and you lose interest in intense mothering. So glad I don’t have to do the teen years a third time. At 50 I want to do my own stuff now. Then it’s 3 through uni three to worry about with jobs etc. I work with many families and the larger families are certainly no happier than smaller if anything the opposite. More kids more scope for things to go wrong

Mumsnet is the wrong website for posting this there's been similar threads in the past and people who say you shouldn't reproduce unless you earn 100k 🤣 or every child should have their own bedroom and en suite.

You need to work out what you can afford after your own mortgage/rent/bills