Hi,
I’ll try and keep this as short and sweet as possible.
met my partner 2022. Fell pregnant quickly. Already had child from previous. He has 2 he does not see.
he drinks a lot. He is an Irish traveller. He commits crime which he is going to be facing the consequences for. He has been abusive towards me from about 4 months into my pregnancy. I’m currently 8 months pregnant with my second for him and 3rd child.
he blames me for absolutely everything that goes wrong. He gambles a lot. He gets medication as he pretends he suffers with mental health and takes a whole packet of Diazapam in one go which usually triggers him to go drinking and commit crime (stealing etc)
he has been leaving me every month first it was a couple of days then it stretched to a week at first I used to be in bits about it but now I don’t care and when he turns up at my door I usually send him away as he’s been gone drinking for the entire duration and doing whatever he does so he can be gone for up to 2 weeks.
my family ask me is this what I want. It’s obviously not but then he says that they are just taking my side. I had an education and job when I met him but he has just pretty much destroyed my life making me have babies which I didn’t really want but he did (do not regret them whatsoever) but life will obviously be tougher for me now. I’m due a Csection in a month I have no one to come with me because we are either going to be broken up or he will be in jail as I’ve told him he has just ruined the relationship.
I stay home every single day I cook clean and look after children he does as he pleases. AIBU to leave. I don’t know why it hurts as I know there isn’t much goodness in my relationship i just wish he would change as he promises when he returns but he just does the same again. Any advice on being a single mom to three. How you managed school runs. How you managed being first floor flat with a 2 year old a newborn and an 8 year old. How you managed getting back into work (as I said I have an education which is quite high and have just fell into a rut thinking I won’t cope)
I’m not sure if I’ve posted to the right place but I just wanted some advice and let me know if I was wrong for asking him to stop drinking as he drinks to excess and has been abusive whilst drunk many times (I’ve had to get the police to him - he says me asking him to stop is me controlling him) he’s never worked a day in his 33 years of life and has been to prison many times before I knew him as the only way he believes he can get some income is by being a criminal.
sorry if it all just seems like waffle. There’s 2.5 years to unpack and so much more I could say I have just tried to throw everything in in one. Thanks for reading if you got this far lol.