Heartbroken over porn use

[Cryingoverporn]

My husband and I had a very infrequent sex life. I found out that he was downloading hundreds of porn videos, whilst never having sex with me.

About a year ago we had a heart-to-heart, and he stopped watching porn and our sex life improved dramatically. However, over the last few months we are back to never having sex or hardly ever, and I looked at his laptop this evening ( he is at work), and he is downloading reams and reams of porn again.

I cannot compete with the girls in these videos. I’m reasonably attractive but I am 54 years old!! I feel absolutely heartbroken. He has experienced what a proper sex life is with me, as it was so good for six months, but he has obviously decided that he prefers the porn/other women, to me.

We have a great holiday coming up and lots of retirement plans, but I just feel absolutely done in, and I think for the first time ever, I’m actually truly ready to throw in the towel on our relationship over this. I cannot imagine going into retirement and being celibate, whilst he watches other women on a screen in another room.

Any advice? I feel fucking crushed. I think I need to move on. He’s had so many chances to put this right.

So she’s the reason he uses porn?

She said herself, their sex life improved when he didn’t watch porn. This is on him.

Your ‘man here’, isn’t the intellectual trump card you think it is.

🤣🤣🤣
Go to bed

I don’t really understand your post. I am a very sexual woman and I am always trying to have sex with him. What more can I do?!

Personally I’m not too fussed about my Husband watching porn, but it doesn’t stop him wanting to have sex with me. In this case it’s excessive and debilitating and you also don’t find it acceptable. Would he consider counselling or have you just had enough ?

I wouldn’t care so much if his watching it didn’t mean he stops having sex with me!!

Ah yes, all women are oblivious when it comes to sex, OP, you know.

Obviously we know nothing about natural male desire.

Not seen such a hilarious post on MN in months!

"Man here.
Ignore women.
Problem solved "

Ignore men on this thread trying to tell you that you need to fix this and that women don't understand men and their "need" for porn - fuck that shit.

I'm sorry OP, he sounds broken and it's not your issue to fix him or hurt yourself more by being with a man who is rapidly rendering himself impotent.

It's not you, it's his broken connections in his brain. He's an addict and he isn't going to change.

Fucking hell. That has to be a piss take dude. Nice one 😂

Maybe it's got to the point where you need to decide whether this is the end or something to accept OP. He's obviously not going to change. Im sorry man.

This is such gaslighting bullshit btw

"At 54 years young, you still have much more than you need to arouse and interest your man. Focus on the psychology of establishing a true connection and he won't need to go near porn."

What about the bloke establishing a true connection instead of engaging with women on sex sites? What about the bloke being respectful of his partner so she doesn't feel like he's prioritising imaginary sex slaves over her?

Focus on the psychology of why you chose to gaslight this woman on a day she needs support? What a loser.

lol

Because ge's using his hand whilst watching.

Ok here’s a question. If I leave him and start over, what are the chances of finding a man in his 50’s who can fuck? 😭

Because mine has ED

I have my doubts this post is real. I know men have become bad, but surely not this bad? It’s like we aren’t quite human and we exist only to please them. I fear for the future of humanity, haha!

This is literally the biggest loads of bollox I've ever read on here. And that's saying something!

What do you say to the reams of sites set up to help men who want to give up said porn/ wanking habbits and save their ability to enjoy real life sex.

You're either a bit dense or being deliberately moronic because you gave your own problem in this area.

Toilet, after you're in bed, in the same room and quietly edging until an appropriate time...

Of course he does. He isn't getting hot and worked up and then going down to make a sandwich and talk to you about the weather with a boner in his pants.

So many sad little men now would rather lock themselves away clutching their penises with a death grip for a 2 minute walk, rather than engage with their partner and put in the effort and connection of sex.

I'm.sorry for what you're going through.

Man here.

Oh thank fuck for that. Us women can't handle this one, so it's great you showed up, right on cue 🙄

You aren't getting fucked either way.

And their is a third choice- single life. You don't need a man.

You didn't need to tell us you're a man.

They all do it in the toilet. Unless you don't have doors or everything go to the loo or bath yourself, or he doesn't do it before coming our of the home office while he is "working" or in the car.