To feel slightly suspicious of dp

[wwyt]

Hi, I'm looking to know would YOU be suspicious? I'm not really suspicious but maybe a bit slightly?

So, dp works for his dads business and has for the last 10 years. Dp doesn't start work until 9. Usually he would set an alarm for 8:30 which sounds really late but his workplace is a 2 minute drive from our home. And he's really easy going 🤣. His dad doesn't drive but a workmate would always collect him.

About a month ago dp started setting alarms at 6.45-7:15 getting up and leaving the house within 10 mins of those alarms. (Extremely early from before) I've been with dp 5 years he's never up that early for work.

He says it's because he's starting to give his dad a lift to work every morning. His mum and dad live a 5 minute drive from our home. That's not too suspicious. But the thing that's making me go 🤨 is he's leaving home in the mornings in his normal clothes. He says he gets ready in his parents house just before he leaves for work as it's easier?

He has a specific work uniform. He would always get ready here before leaving.

So he's started leaving the house over an hour earlier than usual and not getting ready here?

Would you be suspicious?

Your instincts are powerful. Don’t dismiss them. I like that you have a friend that has your back. I hope this turns out to be nothing 🤞🏼💕

How do you intend to follow him? Surely he'll see you running out of the house and straight into a car as soon as he sets off? If you leave it a while after he leaves, he could be anywhere.
As awful as it is, I'd suggest a tracker

Put a tracking device on his car and you'll have your answer.

Turn the driving history setting and location on on your phone and leave it with the volume off hidden in his car

My initial thoughts:

1. Affair
2. For some reason he’s told his parents you’ve split up
3. He’s got another job that he’s doing before his job with his dad. This would be to help fund: gambling, drugs, paying off a loan for secret shopping, paying for a secret child somewhere.
4. He has another child that he’s doing a morning routine with.

Sorry you’re going through this, it’s worrying for you. Keep us updated please!

All sounds suspicious , what a brilliant friend you've got there !!

It’s such a shame when people dismiss their partner’s concerns. I would be furious if my mum criticised my husband’s weight and so would he if mil called me overweight.

So how does he explain to his parents the car being parked up outside their house/on their street 2hrs early every morning? Unless you assume that they're complicit.

Definately suspicious.... Probably not an affair (I agree it would be a really crap deal to only get an hour at 7am and also I think he'd be showering in the morning as well if that was the case)... but maybe seeing an escort or has a male hook up situation?

Or he's going somewhere for coffee/ breakfast and fancies someone there and hopes the expensive watch / excess of spray will catch their attention?

Is he maybe learning to do something like dance or play an instrument as a surprise and he's going for some kind of lessons in the morning?

very strange behviour though...

Hope you get an answer OP.

If he leaves within 10 minutes of waking up does he even bother to brush his teeth and shower? If not only a desperate woman will be having an affair with him.

I was wondering if he told his parents he had moved back home, but perhaps they would notice.
Sadly you will have to get up and follow him to see what he is doing

It's sweet you believe that parents wouldn't cover for their cheating son. Wrong, but sweet.

So he wears his regular clothes when he leaves and says he'll change into work gear at his parents? That's reallly strange given that he's never done it before and also that his parents only live 5 minutes away. I mean, what's the point of getting changed twice in the space of half an hour? Does he bring the regular clothes home with him - all of them? Does he take a bag with him in the morning - have you checked its contents? Obvious question, have you checked his phone?

commenting so I can see what happens tomorrow, really hope it’s nothing bad

It’s all very odd. It’s good you have a plan to find out where he is going.

So if he leaves for “ work “ in his regular clothes and his £400 watch and comes home in his work uniform / overalls , where does he leave his everyday clothes and jewellery ? If he does this for 6 days a week every week he will soon have no clothes left at home.

I don’t understand why his eyes are sore from welding , doesn’t he wear PPE (flame retardant fabrics ) , boots and a face shield ?

How do his work clothes get back to work each day ?

This doesn’t make sense.

I hope its all innocent too. Its really odd how he doesn't leave the house in his work clothes if he's changing into them at his parents.

Definitely suspicious! I’d be doing the same. Well done to your friend for stepping up to get an answer for you.

Or he's going somewhere for coffee/ breakfast and fancies someone there and hopes the expensive watch / excess of spray will catch their attention?

Not an expensive watch though and surely nobody’s impressed by excessive aftershave/perfume etc?

He’s definitely doing something that requires him not to be in his work clothes. Or which he doesn’t want to be in his work clothes for.

I agree with this. His mum is rude to OP but she lets her DP take their baby to see her MIL multiple times a week. She is excluded from the family and now her DP is acting suspiciously. As her ILs don't like the OP, they would probably encourage their son to cheat on and leave the OP.

Sorry OP but this is so weird, how on earth is it easier to get up and dressed in work clothes plus expensive watch, drive 5 minutes down the road to parents house and then change into work clothes there? Why would anyone realistically do that? Wear normal clothes for 5 minutes then get changed again?

And for people saying who wouldn't and affair that early in the morning, if you're having an affair you see each other whenever you can, whatever time of day.

I'm so sorry OP it doesn't look good. Pleased you have a friend supporting you with this.

Sorry that was meant to say "get up and dressed into home/normal clothes" then work clothes somewhere else.