Should I mention this to school or mind my own business?

[GreasyChipButty]

I took my son and dog for a walk to the park yesterday evening and as we approached, a little girl said she knew my son and they are in the same class. My son is 4 and he is in reception.

The little girl was with an older girl around 7 for about 5 minutes before the older girl left, leaving the 4 year old completely on her own.

I let them play for a while, thinking someone would be along to get her but no one came.

I said we are leaving the park now, and would she like me to walk her home. She said no thank you.

The park sits completely opposite some houses, there is a road inbetween though. I assumed she lived in one of those but as I changed direction in order to ensure she got home safe, she lived some distance from the park.

Now, is it just me or is this batshit? Allowing your 4 year old to go to the park on their own and cross 2 roads to get there?

I watched her walk back into her house but couldn't help but think how easy it would have been for someone to just scoop her up and take her away. The world we live in nowadays is not safe for this to be happening. Or am I behind with the times, and it is actually fine to let a 4 year old walk a short distance to a park.

I mentioned it in work and people are telling me I should tell the school! I am not a busy body but at the same time, I do wonder if anything is going on at home for this to happen, seems like neglect to me but of course I could be wrong.

Just wondering what others think?

Roads are much safer now than in any time in UK history

Apart from the ones used around here by boy racers, mostly in stolen cars.

They bomb around these side streets like there's no tomorrow, and as always, the police are too overstretched to patrol the area.

The most you see is the occasional police car chase, which is actually worse for a 4 year old on roller skates.

Maybe things have changed. I rang the school about a safeguarding issue when my kids were in primary school and was told to ring social services.

Statistically still safer.

That’s very unlikely

Was the 7 year old a big sister?

It maybe that the 7 year old was watching her and wandered off. As a kid when I was like 7/8/9/10 and started going out riding bikes and playing with friends it wasn't unusual for 4-5 year olds to be wandering around. They all had older siblings who where out and 'suppose' to keep and eye on them but they always ditched the annoying little sibling as fast as possible.

Absolutely mention it to school this is a safe guarding issue its finest - even if it is just that the child has gotten out of the yard and wandered off why weren't the parents paying attention.

I remember my daughter was with me in the kitchen one evening as I was preparing for work the next day one evening and she didn't leave the house as all doors were locked it was that time of day. she had hidden behind the sofa but I went crazy looking for her to the point where I called my wife from the other side the house to look for her only for her to be behind the sofa but I was going crazy with worry

Having a 7 year old watch a 4 year old is still neglect.

The older kid would have to be secondary age for it to be acceptable.

It's not. In the UK there are no rules on age.

Not saying I agree but if this is the only issue, what exactly do you think anyone will do?

As someone who works with safeguarding kids please flag this to the school. It's very likely to be part of a bigger picture of neglect.

I don't think either a 4 year old or a 7 year old should be out by themselves. But I don't see what the school could do about it presumably someone picked them up from school as the school wouldn't let them go unless someone was there for them

Yes, tell the school. They will have a bigger picture, and/or could have a word with parents if necessary.

Find out who the DSL is at school and tell them. They can decide if it should be taken further.

What is the purpose of society if not to safeguard children? Call the school.

I'm completely on board with all the messages that this isn't right, whilst simultaneously being really sad that kids no longer have the freedom they did in years gone by. My grandparents and parents say they were out until teatime with no supervision. I also lived on an army camp so was allowed out from a very young age (we left when I was 7 so I must have been young to be out on my own/just with older siblings). But would just never ever let my kids do the same. It makes me sad.

It entirely depends on where you move to.

We're in England - small village, very few roads, no busy roads close by. The kids play out in the street from 5/6 (it's the type of place where any neighbour will tell off a child, tell message a parent to if necessary and it won't get a rude/aggressive really). Most of the kids who live close by walk to school themselves from 8, some walk younger with older siblings. Theres a park behind our house, next to the school, and kids often play there from 6/7 if they live in one of the surrounding streets.

The next nearest primary school (where DD used to go) to us sits on a road junction and it's really difficult to see all ways and the crossing patrol is really unreliable due to cutbacks so very few children walk at all. Even adults don't like crossing there even though it's not a massively busy road.

Where my BIL and SIL live kids just don't play out at all. Roads are very busy, park is often covered in glass or dog shit.

It is entirely area dependent

At 4 you should have called the police . They would do checks and inform ss if needed.
That's awful the parents obviously don't care

Safeguarding is everyone's responsibility. Report to school DSL.

Your village sounds lovely!! What region are you in out of interest?

Just to give you an idea of the kind of action that will be taken when you report this to school or Children's Services ( if in the UK). And I agree with PP you should report this.
I used to work in a Children's Centre, about 10 years ago, saw a 5 year old walking about 200m on his own and crossing a road. I spoke to Children's Services about it. They asked us to go and talk to the family instead of undertaking a home visit themselves. I explained to the grandmother that we thought it was risky and that he was too young to assess the danger from the road. She claimed to be watching from a window the whole time. Still we advised against it and CS closed the case.

Definitely tell the school, I'm a DSL, we had this but with a 7 year old. It was part of a larger picture, SS took it seriously and the family and child got the support they needed.

I have reported something l saw which was less serious than this to a school op - you have to report it.

Definitely let the DSL at school know, it may form part of a larger picture. However, the advice we always give alongside recording the information at school is to contact the local children's social care duty team at the time of the incident, as they are available 24/7. Obviously not relevant in hindsight, but useful to know in future. Every council has one and you can google the number. They can act on concerns immediately rather than the delay in reporting that comes with waiting to inform the school.

That poor child. Based on the info given, there is no scenario which would make this OK. Even if the the older girl was the sibling, she shouldn't be looking after a 4 year old child. House close to the park, still not OK. It's complete neglect for a reception aged child to be wandering around a park alone. What if she fell and really hurt herself, or even worse gets run over?

Definitely report it to the school, it's a safeguarding concern and there might be wider issues that school are already aware of.

I would have reported it to the police as soon as I became aware she was alone.

The best rule of safe guarding is if anything seems wrong - report it.

Don’t be one of those people who regret not saying or doing something. School will know what to do - that’s why the have a designated safe guarding team.