To not go on the residential?

[Youthiswastedontheyoung]

I've just started a new p/t teaching role. Towards the end of the academic year the whole year group go on a residential which is about 3.5 hours away, for a full school week.
I have a just-turned 4 yo and other academic commitments outside of school.
AIBU to say I can't attend the residential?
As an aside, my mum (love her) thought teachers got paid for any additional hours regarding this. She was surprised to learn I'd just be getting my standard pay!

Most professional/corporate jobs require some working over your contracted hours. My job involves working away a couple of times a year, working 14+ hours a day for no extra pay for example. But my salary is good and I can mostly work from home. I don't think one week of long hours is unreasonable, but if you do and it's part of the role, you need to look for something else!

How many children are you responsible for even when you go to bed?

As a full-time NHS hospital consultant, it always amuses me when teachers whine about unpaid extra hours and just how much ‘responsibility’ they have ‘on-call’!

And all the petty nitpicking about paid and unpaid days. Teachers receive x amount of money a year and y weeks of official time off. Exactly which days are technically paid and unpaid are irrelevant and tedious to read about.

I have never commented negatively online about patients or relatives. There is plenty wrong with the NHS system but I never blame patients. So many teachers moan about kids and parents. I wonder why they entered the profession.

The OP clearly dislikes her role. I would not want her on a residential with my kids. I would rather the trip didn’t happen.

Exactly Procon. I also sympathise with teachers my family are teachers but ones who have only taught can get caught up in the negative attitude. Most jobs can be tough. Us small business owners don’t get paid if we don’t get clients which is pretty flipping stressful!

Yes, I agree, I'd much rather the trip didn't run than teachers who are so angry about it take the DC. IME though, most teachers don't feel like this. We get plenty of volunteers.

@ArdMhaca I wasn't referring to childcare regarding the residential week. That poster told me if I wanted to be able to afford to buy a house I should be working full-time. Incredibly rude I feel, considering she has no idea about my personal financial circumstances or family situation.

@Fluufer What on earth has this got to do with it? My husband would not necessarily be capable of looking after our daughter on his own for an entire week; especially true if he is having a bad week in terms of his spinal condition. He is currently on a phased return to work after his surgery and doing well, but he still has really bad days/weeks. It's degenerative - he's not going to "get better"!!

I literally just responded to another poster that you aren't a single parent. Not sure why you and that other poster are so bothered by that factual statement.

@Fluufer And your point is?

@Konstantine8364

I don't think one week of long hours is unreasonable

And indeed it wouldn't be but for the fact that EVERY week in the teaching profession requires working long hours.
I do get that other professions give additional time too. This isn't about saying that teaching is the hardest job or more taxing than anyone else's but there are so many misconceptions about teachers' workloads.

@ProCon
I guess those with preset judgements will never be convinced otherwise. Teaching is a very rewarding but also very exhausting profession. Teachers have a life outside of work though (as do all professionals) and they are entitled to enjoy that life and prioritise their own family without others accusing them of whinging or disliking their jobs.
An NHS consultant's role is very different from that of a teacher.

I'm not sure saying that a 5-day/week teacher is part-time will clarify matters to anyone's satisfaction. Try putting it as your own AIBU, AIBU for clarifying that all teachers are part time workers?
I don't think it'll go very well for you.

I’m trying to explain why just because teachers are paid at the end of every month, 12 months a year, does not mean that they are paid for their 13 weeks school holidays. Just the same as if an office worker in an accountancy firm has negotiated a term-time only contract.

Interesting how controversial this thread has proved! I have commented a couple of times but not voted.

I guess that most jobs end up setting themselves at a level of demand at which people are prepared to do them, and which the end user is prepared to accept, in our capitalist society.

I do wonder why, if teaching is as awful as it is made out, people still choose to do it. If it’s because it fits round your family/ school holidays, then I guess that balances things out for you, and it’s not so awful after all.

If it’s another reason, the same is likely to apply.

I have a public section job too, with a level of responsibility that would be far better paid in the private sector. I choose to do this job because I am interested and motivated by it. I wouldn’t be motivated by money alone, or by making money for someone else, so I accept my own choice - I know that no one made me work in the public sector!

@StolenChanel I have read the full thread. The OP's husband has hurt his back. We are talking about a residential in 10 months' time.

We only know what you've told us, which is you can't afford to buy a house on your wage. So I suggested working full time to earn more money.

Since you seem to have missed these:

My husband had major back surgery at the start of the summer holidays as he has a serious spinal condition.

It's degenerative - he's not going to "get better"!!

There may be others on the thread but I can’t be arsed to scroll that far up.

@PicturePlace No, you haven't read the thread. If you had you would know my husband has not hurt his back.
Come to the front of the class - maybe that will improve your understanding?

Or maybe mention all the information you want people to consider in the OP? Or at least your first 20 responses... You can't drip feed then get pissy that we didn't all guess.

It’s irrelevant to the point. The point is, no one in any sector should be expected to work voluntarily on what is essentially a 100 hour working week. If people choose to do so, great, wonderful, superb. But those who can’t (or simply don’t want to) shouldn’t be chastised for it. Things can’t be both voluntary and compulsory at the same time. And I’m yet to see a teaching contract that stipulates that residentials are compulsory.

Working late to mark books or plan, parents evenings or school fairs are not the same as a full week residential trip. There are teachers who will happily do so and there are teachers who will not want to, just like there are children who love residential trips and children who hate them. Teachers are human beings too.

I was thinking this.
OP, if you had led with 'I have been asked to go on a school residential, but am worried that my husband will not be able to care for our 4 year old whilst I am away as he has a degenerative condition, do you think I should go and speak to head to let them know I will really struggle to do this residential', then I think you would have got a vastly different response.
In your initial comments it was very much around 'I'm not paid enough to do residential and how unreasonable parents are to expect me to do these'.

Its the difference between 'cant' and 'wont'. If you can't do it then you can't do it, thats a fact. If you could do it but you refuse, then that's very different.

@Bushmillsbabe My husband's ill health is certainly a contributory factor for me to consider, but I still don't think it should be an expectation that teachers go on residentials, especially 5 day ones.

I disagree. And evidently so do plenty of others. A year 6 residential should be pretty much expected of a year 6 teacher. A disabled husband, is obviously a reasonable exception, but wasn't mentioned.
This is also OPs perhaps 10th post whining about teaching under her various user names. She quite obviously hates it.

@Fluufer Again you have failed to understand. Where have I said I hate teaching?
I've got you a chair.

How many threads have you started complaining about things you like?

@Fluufer Again, your comment makes no sense. One doesn't tend to complain about things they like!