Why are so many people nasty to each other on here

[CamFoz]

Honestly, I have never been on a forum where people say such nasty things to each other. Fair enough, I haven't been on many forums, but users on MN will write a whole paragraph trashing each other. The judgemental attitudes on here are atrocious, most of the time over quite menial things. Do people really have that much time on their hands for this?

Someone the other day was asking for some advice on how to help her daughter I think. And a response was ‘I have searched your name, could you not have been researching this yourself when you posted about * the other day?’

Honestly just so so weird. Who does that.

But why don't you just ingore them like I do?

I don't let them affect me at all that way and just forget them.

One thing ive learned on mumsnet is that women can be just as abusive as men.

S&B baffles me. People pop on and gently ask for help and get utterly crushed. I don't get it. There are a couple of individuals who will jump on any S&B thread and make it all about them (and their horrible tenty parachute dresses). God help you if you disagree with them. You're not allowed to like mainstream clothes manufacturers anymore on MN. You'll get absolutely slated. The mother of the groom one recently was brutal. Poor lady.

Yep, women/girls can be absolutely awful to eachother.

I have seen the odd bitchy/nasty comment on here but it's absolutely nothing compared to what I see daily on the social media platforms.

Good point. I think it goes back to Anne Robinson and The Weakest Link as well. It's normalised people being stand up rude to someone's face.

That's interesting because I have never heard a man call a woman bitchy tbh or a man comment on what a woman is wearing, I have genuinely only really heard that come from other women and as a woman myself I try to shut that shit down if the woman on the receiving end of it has done nothing wrong. If I'm being a bitch then call me a bitch because I have indeed been a complete bitch on some occasions because I'm only human and have deserved to be called that. I see on here all the time that a lot of people enjoy a pile on and seeing as it's mostly women doing it to each other I do wonder why those same women then say "it's the men doing it to us you never hear a woman slagging a woman off" well I see it every day on here and that's fine btw we are allowed to be as cunty as we like, but in my experience of this world it's women hating on other women and as a woman I can't ignore that but if I point it out I'm being a "cool girl" or "sticking up for men" or "being misogynistic" and then I get piled on lol. I teach my daughter and I taught my son when he was alive that nobody is better than anybody else and nobody is above being called out on their shitty behaviour.

I just assume they were bullies in school, or just horrible people, or people who don’t have much joy in their lives so get their kicks out of coming on here to argue.

I have noticed the same usernames, often bring rude,appear on threads about things like SAHMs or obesity and here I think they might have a slight obsession. Probably projection of some kind for some.

I have to say mumsnet is the forum that I have seen the most nastiest bullying I've seen on any forum anywhere.

I think it's down to two things, it's a forum that is predominantly female, and also there is a lack of good moderation of bullies on here.

Most other forums are more mixed gender, and the balance of genders seem to keep each other in balance on those forums

Recently someone posted about thoughts on their autumn decorations. They received an onslaught of nastiness and horrible remarks from people who thought they were being funny. And someone stated "Are you American" as if being American is an insult.
Also the posts about Catherine, Princess of Wales and her recovery family film. All the comments " I'm glad she's better but..." which then slagged off her video.
Kate has had an appalling time as a result of cancer.
What sort of people enjoy being nasty about something innocent like autumn decorations and a woman who's recovering from cancer.

There are some really helpful and polite people.

However, there are also some that absolutely love sticking the knife in and acting like saints.

I guess balance of real life. :-/

I've always said that men are physically destructive and women are psychologically destructive.

Its how they hurt.

The amount of nastiness and cruelty on mumsnet is shocking

You don't have to understand why other people do things though.
You just do what makes you happy and let others get on with it.

This is probably true to an extent - but looking at it as a "developmental stage" "to develop as human beings" is also part of the structural inequality, isn't it? Men are considered full human beings no matter how rude they are, and can continue doing it their whole lives if they like without being expected to grow out of it.

I don't think the question about being American was intended to be offensive. It's a much bigger thing in America to decorate your house according to the season.

I think maybe the word you meant was Trivial. Menial doesn’t make any sense in that context.

https://www.reddit.com/r/rant/s/dRzHaR9eIg

Everywhere's the same.
Some people are saints, some are devils and most of us are somewhere in between.

There are still enough lovely people on here so I am happy to read and contribute. Horrible people are everywhere in real life, inevitable they are on here too.

It's because MN has become really massive.

I know that autumn and Halloween decorations are a big thing in parts of the USA, it was the general tone of the question and the accompanying unpleasant posts that I found nasty.

I agree.

I dip in and out. Less and less frequently because it really is very little but moaning, arguing, pontificating and outright trolling.

Sometimes there are some good chats and discussions but a lot of posters take any opportunity to trot out the same diatribes and it gets very monotonous and boring aside from anything else.

There's an awful lot of deliberately goady threads. They always go more or less the same way.

Sometimes I think coming on here is a bit like going up to that person at work/ at the bus stop/ post office/ the neighbour a few doors down that you always try to avoid and asking them to offload all their biggest complaints and critique your lifestyle for you.

Sahms are obesity are the two topics that get the most bashing imo too. Really hits some nerves.

I agree. It's like someone on Tattle Life has started a planned infiltration of MN!

A lot of it is pure nastiness for nastiness' sake and a lot of it is pure jealousy and bitterness.

If someone has something nice to celebrate, instead of thinking "ah, how lovely" it descends into the type of behaviour the bitchiest girls at school would have been proud of.

Thankfully the majority of people on the threads shoot them down, but it still brings back memories of those bullying, bitchy cliques from school that are never happy unless everyone around them is miserable. What a joy life must be!

I definitely agree