To feel a bit conflicted about declining a kind invite while travelling?

[Kindkitty]

I’ve just arrived in Lille for a short break and while getting off the Eurostar, I met a lovely woman from London who’s also here. We walked to our hotels together and exchanged numbers. Out of the blue, via text, she just invited me to join her tomorrow night for an aperitif at her hotel’s rooftop bar (her treat) and then to head out to dinner together.

Here’s the thing - I already have plans for tomorrow night that I’m really excited about and I’m not keen on changing them. Part of me feels a bit guilty though for not accepting her friendly gesture, especially since we just met, and it’s rare to click with someone so quickly while travelling solo.

AIBU to politely decline, or should I try to fit this in somehow? Would you feel bad turning down such an invite?

My okey dokey wasn’t sarcastic! I genuinely was saying okay to what you said, I agreed. Didn’t mean anything else by it. It’s all good

Oh dear just read your update 🙈

'What a nice invitation. I'm afraid it's not going to work for me. I'm on a really tight schedule. Got things planned back to back. But thanks '
I was in a similar situation recently and sent this. It was OK.

No worries, my mistake entirely! Sounds like you have a great break sorted, have a wonderful time.

No that’s okay, I was so lost! But then I read the comment back and realised how it came across. I probably should have said more than just okey dokey, so I understand

Was she trying to pick you up?

I may have said we should meet for lunch /drinks at Lille before train back but I don't like the idea of someone latching onto me for a whole holiday.

But sounds like you had a lucky escape!!

Yes I really am 🤣🤣🤣

she’s on par with how some men act when they’re rejected! Hopefully I don’t see her on the way back 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Exactly and I didn’t really want to commit tbh, or feel committed or lacked on either so I left it kinda open I thought 🤣🤣

I’ve blocked! She sent me some texts too just now saying that I was ungrateful and that she was only trying to be nice.

My God, what have I got myself into here?! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

It came across that way to me too

Hopefully I don’t see her on the way back

You've bought back a memory there. About 20 years ago, I auditioned for a part in a reality-competition television program, where contestants would be trained by a professional home stager. And when I say "auditioned", what I mean is that about five-hundred of us queued for over six hours before being interviewed several times by different members of the production company.

Anyway, having left one interview and was standing in a crowded kitchenette fighting for a cup of coffee, I got chatting to a woman who had the most horrific body odour. As luck would have it, we lived in the same county and were travelling back to the same railway station. She was effervescent about the prospect of us travelling home together, never have I been so glad to have an open-ended return ticket, meaning I could travel any time I liked.

And spoiler alert, I didn't get onto the show. Nor did she. Two of the six contestants included a former "That's Life" presenter and a member of Bucks Fizz respectively, so I guess being famous already went a long way in those auditions.

My thoughts exactly. I don't know how some people get through life if the thought of meeting a new friend for a drink scares them 😂

She read your poster on MN OP that's why she's pissed 😬

Oh haaaaaa missed this one. Ok maybe she was a murderer then 😂

I mean, I don’t think so/hope so?!

she said that the way I declined her isn’t in line with how I spoke to her on the train!

Just block her and forget about her. She is someone you met once.

There is one and only one response that any sane person in her position should have given to you, and here it is:

"Oh, ok, nevermind & thanks for letting me know! Another time maybe?"

or any variation of that which captures the spirit of same.

Even if she was gutted, a sane person wouldn't have told you so.

Yeh for sure, I’m more amused more than anything really

Did she really tell you to Fuck Off ?? I would have said yeah go if you can . But now every cliche about mad people you don't really know is true . How very strange and needy of her.

I assume some misread it as her place.

Blimey!! I'm genuinely surprised at that, what an odd response!

I think your intuition got a good read on her behaviour when she was coming across as superficially pleasant company hence not feeling comfortable replying to her, and asking on here what to do. I know people post about anything and everything so didn't think you shouldn't. However, I'll admit to wondering why you needed to ask here when you were busy anyway and had excuses but it's clear something felt off and you were proven right.

@Kindkitty I'm shocked. Was it just a plain F off. My god, lucky escape for you

Omg lucky escape from body odour there 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

you would have got a F off too if you told her maybe haha.

so are you famous or a reality star in some way now haha?

Yeah honestly. The first text just said F off, nothing else. I thought she sent it to the wrong person at first, but then she sent the follow up texts saying I was ungrateful, and different from how I was speaking to her on the way to the hotel

This sounds more romantic than friendship based. I think you misundrstood each other's intentions...

Yeah, I know it probably was a bit silly asking her perhaps. I found the text quite forward like something felt a bit off but then I wasn’t sure if I was being silly and also had plans etc. I’ve met many people on my travels, made plans etc but this felt a bit forward in a different way

Asking “here” that meant to say