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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Feral children

678 replies

Overbearingndn · 03/09/2024 19:01

Several children, have been arrested in connection with the death of an 80 year old dog walker.

What is wrong with children today? I remember the Bulger case and it sent shockwaves around the world, now people just accept that children kill.
https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/article/2024/sep/03/five-children-arrested-over-murder-80-year-old-man-in-leicestershire

opening post edited by MNHQ

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
TheNuthatch · 04/09/2024 09:34

soupfiend · 04/09/2024 07:32

I said much earlier in the thread that most incidents like this with children result in NFA

They will have been involved though, the police just dont have enough to charge.

Maybe you're right, I don't know.

Maybe we should all wait for the actual facts of the matter before pp call for 12 year old children to be named, shamed and euthanized!

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 04/09/2024 10:01

As Morph said correctly the parking happened in isn't a "shithole" as some seem to think. It's very close to the city and has some "lively" areas close by but actually it's a nice area, A lively library and community centre close by, lots of play parks and green space and a several schools.It's actually quite a nice area.

samarrange · 04/09/2024 10:36

TheNuthatch · 04/09/2024 09:34

Maybe you're right, I don't know.

Maybe we should all wait for the actual facts of the matter before pp call for 12 year old children to be named, shamed and euthanized!

No no no. Clearly you are some namby-pamby do-gooder. The police should have shot everyone within 200 yards (I refuse to say metres) of the park. Then they should have shot you, and everyone else on this thread who insists on loony woke things like "evidence" or "defence lawyers". Habeas corpus is a disaster, I don't know what Henry Ii was thinking. Probably did it to keep Europe happy.

TERFtown · 04/09/2024 11:00

What happened to the poor man's dog?

Efacsen · 04/09/2024 11:06

TERFtown · 04/09/2024 11:00

What happened to the poor man's dog?

Not seen anything about the dog so presume it's okay - the victim was very close to home so maybe it went home/was heard barking and raised the alarm - obviously speculation

TheNuthatch · 04/09/2024 11:20

samarrange · 04/09/2024 10:36

No no no. Clearly you are some namby-pamby do-gooder. The police should have shot everyone within 200 yards (I refuse to say metres) of the park. Then they should have shot you, and everyone else on this thread who insists on loony woke things like "evidence" or "defence lawyers". Habeas corpus is a disaster, I don't know what Henry Ii was thinking. Probably did it to keep Europe happy.

Thank you for that, I needed a giggle!
You describe me down to a T! 🤣🤣
Yes I agree, 'the great writ' should be abolished immediately 😂

TempestTost · 04/09/2024 11:44

WearyAuldWumman · 04/09/2024 00:29

I agree with regard to cannabis. I can think of two particular boys whose lives were absolutely blighted by it.

In one case, it was really bright boy whose mum smoked the stuff herself. I managed to get him a basic qualification: he didn't attend school most days, but i persuaded him to come in one day and sit all his internal assessments at one time.

I recall phoning his mum and her saying "Well, you can try speaking to him yourself..."

The other lad definitely had anger management problems. He suddenly became very "mellow". He actually began to work.

His dealer got him onto heroin. The last I heard, he was being used as a rent boy. Yes, everything was passed on to the appropriate authorities, but social work wouldn't act. As for the police...they don't care about cannabis.

My husband and his best friend went to see the police about girls who were being abused after getting high. (The friend's daughter was a victim. This was in the north of Scotland.) They gave the name of the dealer. "Ah, you see - we only want the big fish."

Yah, people don't take cannabis nearly seriously enough.

Here is CAnada we made it legal a few years ago, there are now government stores where you can go buy it, there are people in there who are "experts" and advise you on what you want to get like you were buying wine.

Weirdly this seems to have been interpreted by the general population as believing that it's perfectly safe stuff with no issues. There has been a huge increase in cannabis psychosis incidents. But also., many parents now seem completely blase about their kids using. My teens tell me a lot of their friends in school get theirs from their parents, starting at age 11 or 12. Which has to be about the WORST time to start with it.

It's weird, because even though you can buy tobacco and booze legally, everyone accepts those can have health and social implications and should be treated with care - even people who don't treat it with care know they should. But the attitude I find from people about cannabis is since the government made it legal recently it must not have health problems associated with it, or they would not have done it.

Weirdly, when new information about safety issues comes out - there was some recently where now that it's easier to do studies on cannabis they found smoking it isn't that much better than tobacco (shocker), it gets nowhere in the news.

oakleaffy · 04/09/2024 11:51

Hunglikeapolevaulter · 04/09/2024 06:14

Almost everywhere in the western world, including the UK, crime is about half what it was 30 years ago. (Nobody knows why, either.)

Because there are barely any police and it's impossible to report almost any crimes.

THIS.

Because crime is seriously unreported these days with the cuts,

So many local police stations closed down.

When was the last time you saw a copper on his 'beat? '

Hardly ever.

TempestTost · 04/09/2024 11:52

Hunglikeapolevaulter · 04/09/2024 06:31

@WearyAuldWumman I remember your post, horrific and it has stayed with me. As shocking at this Leicester case is, thinking about it it's hardly an uncommon occurance for a gang of youths to attack and even kill people, I'm thinking most recently of the bus driver in Aberdeenshire. Of course the SNP response is to become ever softer on youth crime.

As @@Thevelvelletes rightly also points out about Aberdeen. I've read numerous recent reports of the situation there and it's not good.

Thing is, there's a massive culture in Scotland of tolerance for low level poor behaviour from children and they are allowed to play out unsupervised from a very young age. Anyone who is on a fb community group will have seen the posts complaining about chappie (knocking a door and running away), kids coming into gardens etc and the amount of vitriol they generally get back is staggering. Person after person saying aww they're just weans and weren't you ever young? Oh and there's nothing for them to do apparently.
Of course by 12/13 the behaviour has then escalated to vandalism and assault. Absolutely zero consequences. As an adult, if you tell them off you'll be hounded mercilessly and probably have the parents on you as well. Defend yourself and it's you that's in trouble.

If I have to pass a group of teens in the street now, I can feel my heart rate escalate. I won't get trains when they're travelling to or from school.

I don't think it's the playing out unsupervised that's the issue.

It's the lack of direction from all the adults in their lives, either by neglect or because people like teachers aren't really allowed to give it. Neighbours certainly won't. They won't likely go to church or have a priest or minister or anyone like that in their lives.

A lot of kids are also not out at all when they are younger, they play video games inside rather than interacting with other kids, as it's "safer" and easier for parents. At a certain point they go out with their friends but I think their socialization has been extremely messed up and it's not great either.

Blueybanditbingochilli · 04/09/2024 11:54

oakleaffy · 04/09/2024 11:51

THIS.

Because crime is seriously unreported these days with the cuts,

So many local police stations closed down.

When was the last time you saw a copper on his 'beat? '

Hardly ever.

Agree. I see crime on a regular basis, it just isn’t reported or acted on in any way. My gran was burgled recently - police were not interested as it was an outbuilding, not her actual house. Not to be deterred, she carried out investigative work herself and got some footage from neighbours showing the burglary. They still weren’t interested, they did literally nothing.

oakleaffy · 04/09/2024 11:55

TempestTost · 04/09/2024 11:44

Yah, people don't take cannabis nearly seriously enough.

Here is CAnada we made it legal a few years ago, there are now government stores where you can go buy it, there are people in there who are "experts" and advise you on what you want to get like you were buying wine.

Weirdly this seems to have been interpreted by the general population as believing that it's perfectly safe stuff with no issues. There has been a huge increase in cannabis psychosis incidents. But also., many parents now seem completely blase about their kids using. My teens tell me a lot of their friends in school get theirs from their parents, starting at age 11 or 12. Which has to be about the WORST time to start with it.

It's weird, because even though you can buy tobacco and booze legally, everyone accepts those can have health and social implications and should be treated with care - even people who don't treat it with care know they should. But the attitude I find from people about cannabis is since the government made it legal recently it must not have health problems associated with it, or they would not have done it.

Weirdly, when new information about safety issues comes out - there was some recently where now that it's easier to do studies on cannabis they found smoking it isn't that much better than tobacco (shocker), it gets nowhere in the news.

Even ''Pot advocates'' in Amsterdam as far back as 1997 were warning that cannabis and the teenage developing brain was a bad idea.

TempestTost · 04/09/2024 11:59

oakleaffy · 04/09/2024 11:55

Even ''Pot advocates'' in Amsterdam as far back as 1997 were warning that cannabis and the teenage developing brain was a bad idea.

I know, it really is not shocking.

I think the logic is that the state gets freaked out now about even tiny safety issues in some cases, like the way covid is still being talked about here is so over the top.

Tiny safety issues in schools people freak out about.

Then on this, since it's league, they assume it must have NO issues.

But how can they think that? I don't get it.

Getonwitit · 04/09/2024 12:16

I have just read a report from Tranet near Edinburgh, early on Friday evening a pregnant woman was pushed off a bench by 2 teenage boys, her baby didn't survive.

Auburngal · 04/09/2024 12:24

There are some parents who have zero idea how to control their kids. Then see the mum with an obvious baby bump. Why not control your kids first before you decide to have more?

WearyAuldWumman · 04/09/2024 12:31

suburberphobe · 04/09/2024 00:50

I know primary school teachers who have said that parents now think it is entirely the teacher's job to stop their child hitting or swearing; who think it is the teacher's job to toilet-train their child or teach them how to use a knife and fork. I even know teachers who have said there are parents who expect them to get their child washed and dressed in the morning.

OMG. It feels like I have just walked into a parallel universe, reading that. WTF?!

Feel so sorry for that man, just going about his business walking his dog. And so sad for his family and friends. They must be reeling, in shock and broken. My heart breaks for them.

Just dread to think what kind of families those children have grown up in - not excusing them, mind!

Feral kids indeed. Awful.

I'm mainly retired now - just do occasional supply.

I've lost count of the number of times I've heard mothers saying to young children "Wait until you start school...the teacher won't let you do that!"

ntmdino · 04/09/2024 12:54

Paisleydad · 03/09/2024 19:14

I was discussing the murder of the 13yo in Oldbury with my ex earlier. It looks as though a pair of teenagers have entered the 13yo's home and stabbed him to death.

The children involved appear to have no fear or concept of the outcome for themselves let alone the victim or their family and friends.

I can't grasp the thought process (or lack of thought process).

Just to bring this back from the first page...

It's not necessarily that they have no fear of the outcome for themselves - it's just that the inevitable outcome isn't necessarily worse than their lives...an awful lot of young folk these days have lost hope for their future prospects. This is partly reality (climate change, ever-increasing apocalyptic news, economics and politics making everybody's life a misery, and we all know that everything's getting a bit more shit every day), and partly the fact that the Internet brings all of the world's horrors right to the forefront.

When you combine that with a growing up in a poor environment, and it's looking likely that you'll never escape it...spending the rest of your life in prison might not actually seem like a step down.

Arraminta · 04/09/2024 13:11

There have always been people who aren't fit to live in society. They were feral with no conscience or morals, unable to be socialised properly. Incapable of being a useful, productive member of their communities. But many of them were removed from society to end up as cannon fodder in the military, or press ganged into the navy, or thrown into jail and executed, or died of disease etc.

But now we house them, feed them, give them the NHS and allow them to breed.

Paisleydad · 04/09/2024 13:11

ntmdino · 04/09/2024 12:54

Just to bring this back from the first page...

It's not necessarily that they have no fear of the outcome for themselves - it's just that the inevitable outcome isn't necessarily worse than their lives...an awful lot of young folk these days have lost hope for their future prospects. This is partly reality (climate change, ever-increasing apocalyptic news, economics and politics making everybody's life a misery, and we all know that everything's getting a bit more shit every day), and partly the fact that the Internet brings all of the world's horrors right to the forefront.

When you combine that with a growing up in a poor environment, and it's looking likely that you'll never escape it...spending the rest of your life in prison might not actually seem like a step down.

I think you may be crediting these children have a greater insight into the wider problems of the world than they are capable of internalising.

WearyAuldWumman · 04/09/2024 13:12

I hear what you're saying, @ntmdino . That may be the case in England - I don't know. In Scotland, I'm firmly of the belief that it's down to the fact that there are minimal consequences for younger people.

I'll try to say this wihout being too outing. Back in the '90s, I reported that a couple of 13 yr old boys had handed me a piece of imaginative writing in which the main character raped a young member of staff at the school where I worked.

I handed it to their Pastoral Teacher, to be passed to the school's Child Protection Officer.

"Ha, ha, Weary! What have you been teaching those boys?" (Yes, it was a man.)

After leaving school, one of them carried out the attack described in the "story", but on a child victim. First offence. Under 21. Very short sentence in a Young Offenders' Institution because he pled guilty to a lesser crime.

Released. Offended again. Over 21 and deemed to be too dangerous to be released again this time.

We now have a situation here where we're being told that "young people" under the age of 25 aren't really responsible for their actions, because their brains aren't fully developed. God help us.

Arraminta · 04/09/2024 13:13

I'm pretty confident that these murdering children don't give a shit about climate change or the government's economic policy FFS.

Rollorock · 04/09/2024 13:22

@WearyAuldWumman I grew up in Scotland and I agree there’s much less punishment for young people there. I think the theory underpinning this is that they want to rehabilitate rather than criminalise, but they don’t do that well either so we are left in quite a bad position really.

We now have a situation here where we're being told that "young people" under the age of 25 aren't really responsible for their actions, because their brains aren't fully developed. God help us

And yeah I think I remember a high profile case in the news last year involving an under 25 rapist in Scotland getting a super lenient sentence because of that policy.

ntmdino · 04/09/2024 13:26

Arraminta · 04/09/2024 13:13

I'm pretty confident that these murdering children don't give a shit about climate change or the government's economic policy FFS.

So am I. The point is that, viewed from the perspective of a youngster in a deprived area, even getting out of that life doesn't look like a massive improvement because the whole world looks like it's gone to shit, and they're exposed to the worst of it every minute of every day - far more than we were as kids. The bad news hitting people from all angles outweighs the good by orders of magnitude.

Or, to put it another way, "Everything's shit unless you're rich, and you're never going to be rich, so why bother?" taken to an extreme.

MichaelandKirk · 04/09/2024 14:27

I honestly dont know what the answer is here but I visited New York and Dubai recently.

NY used to have a zero tolerance on bad behaviour. Whilst it was 100%not the only answer it massively reduced the crime rate.

In Dubai everyone is shit scared of doing anything illegal. There are no attacks on tourists. No young maundering youths on scooters sailing past people on the street and grabbing their phones. No shop lifting because the consequences are severe. I know these countries have other issues but surly to God we have to have consequences for the parent/parents of this little terrors. On MN I see excuse after excuse given for their behaviour and the endless maybe he had ADHD, maybe he was nerodiverse etc etc.

The women who have these kids are also very likely to be products of a disfunctional upbringing and we throw resources at them. Give them ever chance and they let you down 9 times out of ten with the Mother's allowing their latest 'boyfriend' into these kids lives and giving them the most awful role models to follow.

MichaelandKirk · 04/09/2024 14:32

We had two 15 year olds rob and trash our house a few years ago. The police wanted to get them for a number of robberies in our area but surprise surprise the Mum said they had been with her all day. They found some of my jewellery on them but they couldnt get enough evidence and the CPS said to drop the case and they would get them next time (!!) The police told me that bearing in mind their age they would likely get a smack on the wrist.

There was an option to meet these little scumbags who also hit our dog but again the police told me not to bother. They would turn up in their hoodies and not even look at you. To them we were people who had it all made and they were the victims. Never mind that the reason the house was empty was that we were out at WORK. Something these little scrots have no idea about

Getonwitit · 04/09/2024 14:34

Rollorock · 04/09/2024 13:22

@WearyAuldWumman I grew up in Scotland and I agree there’s much less punishment for young people there. I think the theory underpinning this is that they want to rehabilitate rather than criminalise, but they don’t do that well either so we are left in quite a bad position really.

We now have a situation here where we're being told that "young people" under the age of 25 aren't really responsible for their actions, because their brains aren't fully developed. God help us

And yeah I think I remember a high profile case in the news last year involving an under 25 rapist in Scotland getting a super lenient sentence because of that policy.

Yet our looney Government decided 16 year olds can vote !