To have booked the flights?

[Promptly2024]

Background: my DDad has an apartment in Spain and we have discussed going out there in July 25. We went this year around the same time for 10 days so naturally when you're away somewhere lovely and having a lovely time you want to rebook again. So whilst there we compare mine and DH shifts (his annual leave is already set for the year by his company unfortunately) so they only time we could go, for two weeks, would mean missing the last two days of school for my eldest DD.

Now I don't USUALLY advocate taking kids out of school but as it was for a family holiday and literally the last two days of term we thought it would be okay. I asked DD if she would mind missing the last two days of school as that would be her last days in juniors before going to seniors. Context: DD "hates" school and gets anxiety going so she naturally, at the time, said yes.

A few days ago I noticed easyJet were having a sale released flights today, so I reapproached the subject with DH and DD. DH still wants to go for 2 weeks , DD has changed her mind and is mortified that she will miss the last two days of juniors. Which me and DH understood, however DH still wants to go for two weeks.

I offered several options

1. Go for 2 weeks and DD misses school

1. DH goes out early and I stay back with DD and come out a bit later with her

1. I go out early and he comes out a bit later with DD

1. Book for a shorter break, 8 days after DD finished school

He wasn't really happy with any of it and there wasn't a conclusion to our discussions yesterday.

Fast forward to this morning, he's in bed after a night shift when EasyJet sale released, I noticed the flights we wanted were in the sale (and price creeping up as the minutes go by) so I took the decision to book the shorter holiday so all of us go out after DD finished school, meaning 8 days holiday.. these were the more expensive flights going out as they were IN the school holidays, and the earlier flights were much cheaper. I thought to myself well if we end up wanting to go out earlier (DD changes her mind) then I can change the flights to the earlier flights and the likely cost of the admin charges for changes will be negligible as the flights would be cheaper if we went earlier

Since booking that this morning the flight costs have gone up and up... So I was pleased with my decision.

However on texting DH while I'm at work to let him know what I did, he's now being rude and saying he's basically not going all that way just for 8 days and why have I overcomplicated it and why did I ask her again when she originally agreed and saying that it takes two days to destress after travelling with DD and my DDad (he is a bit of a PITA 🤣)

But I'm really upset by his attitude

AIBu to have done this?

It was easy to understand once it was explained. Plenty of people didn't get it, no one was being difficult. People were just trying to understand. No need to be rude.

How long is the flight?
Anything under 3 hours would be fine with me for 8 days.

It absolutely was hard to understand because getting any clarification from OP was like pulling teeth. It only makes sense now that it has been explained over a few posts.

Difficult? Firstly it obviously was hard to understand at first, since there were multiple people not following. Secondly, it's impossible to try to help until you understand what the issue is. I was happy to help look for flights, trains etc as people do for each other quite often on this forum.

I've already booked them tho 🤣 as nice as Ur offer is

But no one was being difficult. People were just trying to make sense of it.

Right but you mentioned possibly changing them!

Jeez. I'm out. 🤣

Yes only if DD changed her mind I could move the flights to earlier, with same airline, suck up the admin charges, which will most likely pay for itself as the earlier flight is cheaper

Hence why I made the decision to book the shorter (more expensive) flights today while they were at their cheapest, so that we had the option to move them for next to nothing if we decided to

I'm on team @@Promptly2024

You can't let DD miss the end of primary school. Absolute no.

Therefore you are going to have to have an 8 day holiday. End of.

You don't want to pay more than necessary for flights.

You made the right choice OP.

I'd tell my husband to book his own flight out there for as soon as his annual leave starts if it's important to him but you and DD have to wait for her to finish school.

Personally, I wouldn't take my daughter out of school for the last two days of term particularly when she is usually anxious about attending school.

The question is what does your husband want to do now? Give him the option of cancelling the stay at your father's apartment and the flights and point out that you can have a 12-day holiday if you change your destination. Of course, you would have to pay for accommodation. Please make it clear that whatever he decides he is not to continue with the moaning and huffing and puffing. It's time to draw a line under your well-intended "mistake."

Have only read OP updates rather than full thread so not sure if this will be a popular opinion but in the situation of the parents annual leave being set in stone i would not be giving a child a choice. It would be a done deal.

If it was any other time of school year/any other year other than juniors last days, then I would totally agree, I wouldn't ask the kids for their opinion etc,. This is purely just because of last day of juniors

If you booked with Easyjet this morning then you do have 24 hours to cancel with a full refund so might be worth discussing with your DH again and then making a final decision together this evening.

And you'd already asked her

Unless you live outside of Europe tell him to wind his neck in with 'all the way' to Spain, for goodness sake.

If he has such strong opinions why isn't he doing the admin of holiday booking for the family anyway?

I asked her, because it was last days of juniors.

TBF to him he does a lot of family admin in terms.of the household stuff

I do kids/school/clubs/majority of holidays
He does bills/mortgage/insurance

It works for us... Until it doesn't 🤣

If i were him i would happily go out earlier and have some child free time...

And she'd given you an answer already.

I get why you did it. My DP has the irritating habit of not concluding a discussion but missing out on the urgency of booking. We didn't do a summer holiday abroad as ferries had sold out by the time his dithering was over. Given you said you can change them then surely you can keep discussing and find a solution

Good decision OP, sounds fine to me - you get the free accommodation & cheaper flights but DD gets to enjoy her final days at primary school, which is a special time.

If this is the end of Y6 then I think it would be a huge shame to miss it if, like our school, they have an end of year party on the last day for parents and children.

Such a shame that the holiday goes from 14 to 8 days though, I agree with your DH about needing a few days to get into the zone.

School dependant but ours does most of its leavers stuff the week before expecting a lot to be missing.

Though I always wouldn’t let a primary aged child dictate my holiday dates tbh.

She had also since you did ask give an answer, are you saying if you’d of booked the flights you would genuinely go and change them at the whim of a year 6?

All that way? It's Spain, people go there for weekends!

If you rebook the flights to the earlier ones will they definitely be cheaper? I could be wrong but in the T's and C's check it doesn't state that if the new date is cheaper there won't be a refund.