I’m never getting a pet again!

[Whynotmakeittwo]

I have a 13 year old dog and now that she is old I worry about her all the time, she has cataracts now and is blind and her black fur is almost completely grey.

I am dreading the day that we lose her and know that it’s going to be extremely painful for us. Last night, we had to take her to the emergency vets and I thought that was it. Luckily she is fine now! But the emotions that I felt last night, I don’t want to go through again. I feel like having pets is so much pain. Of course they bring you joy too, and there’s more happy times than sad, but I don’t think I could put myself through this again. She had a lump on her paw a few years ago and again, I was worried sick. I know we probably don’t have long left with her and it makes me so sad, I don’t know how we will cope without her (obviously we will, and that sounds dramatic, but if you have a dog you know what I mean). Lots of people get dogs straight after they lose one because they can’t handle not having a dog in the house and feel it’s too empty etc. but I honestly don’t know if I could cope with the worry and sadness again and the hole that they eventually leave.

My DH is so attached to his 2 dogs I absolutely dread when they will die. Luckily neither one of them has ever been ill. Especially because they are litter mates so the same age, so likely one will die then not long before the second one will die. I know he will be unconsolable when they do die. I'm sure the joy they bring outweighs the pain though. They have brought him years of joy.

That's a lovely idea!!

I always advocate for getting an additional pet in the latter years of your pet's lives.
It means that there's joy and another furry little soul to distract and comfort you when the dreaded time comes.

There's no empty transitional period and also that guilty feeling of it being "too soon".

It is also often so wonderful for an elderly pet and it brings them new life

I lost my old boy 5 1/2 years ago and it still hits me now and then. I was walking my girl on my old boy’s favourite beach at the weekend and it hit me in the gut.

I loved the bones of him, he was my boy and I still really, really miss him.

He had a tumour which the vet diagnosed really late (because he didn’t listen to a word I said) so we couldn’t do anything for him other than keep him pain free. He was only 10. I really, really hate that vet and still feel really bitter about it all. I also couldn’t give my boy the ending I desperately wanted for him. I stayed with him to the end and it took a long time to get that image out of my head and be able to remember the good times

I’ve got his ashes on a shelf in the living room. Every now and then I think I must scatter them in all his favourite places, but I can’t quite let them go yet. I don’t know why, I guess it feels like he’s still at home with us.

We did get another dog a year later and I did feel very conflicted about it, but I love her dearly and I’m convinced my old boy is up there whispering in her ear as she’s gets up to all the same mischief he did.

I don’t think I’ll get another one as they leave such massive holes in your heart when they go, but then the joy the bring into your life balances that out.

It is so painful when you lose a pet especially a dog, but you can’t define a dogs life by their last moments and you have to think of the the years of joy and laughter you’ve had.

I lost my beloved boy last Saturday, he was 14 1/2. He had arthritis but was otherwise well, he was poorly Friday night and at 5am we lost him. My two sons and I were with him until the end and are devastated.

I just don't think I could ever go through this again. I live alone and it has been very hard to come home to a silent house. I talk to his casket like a loon, people would think I was crazy if they saw me. I feel a sense of peace that he is home, but god do I miss his fluffy face 😔

He is irreplaceable and will be loved forever but every day gets a little easier OP. I would rather have this pain than never have had my boy in the first place, 14 years of love and cuddles from Ziggy the greatest border collie in the world 💙💙

We lost our dear jasper 15 years ago now, when we had him put to sleep it was so traumatic we could never go through that again, they couldn't get a vain up so ask us to leave the room as they had to go in the kidney, well he howled like a wolf ( he did this when fire police engins went passed our house) most people tell a us having pet put to sleep is peaceful, not for us , I will never forget the sound and it took us weeks to get over the pain I couldn't have another dog.

Like everyone else on here with a pet I get exactly what you mean. My girl is 8 and my heart just clenched in my chest when I read your post and the subsequent responses. It brought tears to my eyes. Enjoy your time together. That’s all you can do…. I love having a pet so will probably get one as the kennel we live in would feel so empty without a hound, just do what works for you and decide when you feel stronger! Lots of kisses to your lovely dog

I have at present a 3yo dog and a 7 month old pup. I had my other wonderful dog for 17 years. He was born here on our farm and he was literally my best friend his whole life. Right up until 3 days before he died he was still bouncing round the yard like he always did, just a bit slower. He went downhill so fast the last 2 days of his life that I didn't have time to prepare myself or my kids that this was it. He ended up he had a stroke and I had to bring him to the vet to be pts. My heart was absolutely broken, but I buried him in my front garden under a chestnut tree and I say hello and goodnight to him every day.
The kids were distraught especially the youngest because he didn't understand, and started to panic about going to heaven and me going to heaven and leaving him behind. I said I'd never have another dog because I still had my 3yo dog but he's too strong and full on for the kids so I relented and that's how we ended up with the pup. To be honest she has helped me so much. She is like my shadow following me everywhere the way my old dog did and although I still miss him so much, she has filled a bit of the hole he left.
On another note, I have a 27yo horse and I know his time will be coming soon and I'll have to go through it all again.

We got my first dog when I was 9, she was 16 when we had to have her PTS (I was 22), I’d not long moved out and she remained sleeping in my empty room 💔 anyway, parents said never again.. within months they got another that brought us all lots of joy.
I have my own now, she’s nearly 15 and is losing her sight, has little hearing and is generally just getting old, I won’t be replacing her with another and if I had my own way it would be never again but husband thinks maybe when we’re older we’ll change our minds.
grief is the price you pay for the love around you, when the time happens you just don’t know how you’ll feel and my parents are testament to that. I guess in their case, kids were leaving home and the dog helped them with company etc. in my case, when my girl goes I still have children at home so will remain busy (and probably why my husband thinks we’ll change our minds in time).
pets are a worry constantly, I hope you have lots of time left with your pooch 🐶

I understand how you feel. I said no more after each of two of mine, but actually got another puppy fairly quickly. My heart was broken each time and the antics of a puppy made me smile and listed my heart. Each one of those puppies grew into a special dog companion in their own right. You won’t really know what you want to do until the time comes 💐

We lost our dog to cancer in June and the pain has been almost unbearable. At first we said "Never again" - I thought my heart would break because she was the most loving dog I'd ever known and she showed us she loved hd every minute she was awake.

But oh, how empty the house is! We're currently abroad for a week and all we can talk about is adopting another dog.

I completely understand this throught. When my lab died I was absolutely distraught and I didn't think I would get another. However a friend was giving up their 2 dogs due to a change in circumstance and offered them to me and getting them was the best thing I ever did. I adore them and they have bought so much love and life back to my home.

All of you who have lost pets I’m so sorry. It hurts so much.

@Whynotmakeittwo I do absolutely get where you’re coming from. And it’s awful every time.

We’ve just had our black cat put to sleep he was 16 and poorly, my youngest DS took him to the vet because I wasn’t expecting it would be the last time. Only it was. DS was sobbing over the phone, I was too, as we made the decision. DS’s brother joined him and they stayed with cat until the end. Bloody amazing kids (adults really).

We still have our lovely tabby cat but am already contemplating another because it’s so quiet and I worry she’ll be lonely. Gone from 4 to 1 cat over the past 3 years.

Yes I know it will be painful again at some point but worth it.

DH and I are very careful about this. It really does help.

We have just moved house and I’d really love another dog but the way I felt when my previous dog passed away was just awful and I’m not so sure I want to set myself up for that level of grief again. When I was packing boxes to move I kept finding pictures of him 😩

We tragically lost one of our beloved dogs in a car crash a month ago. We’d adopted him 4 years ago and was probably about 12 years old. My husband made it out with a few broken ribs but the guilt he’s felt has been horrific. Thankfully, he passed very quickly and we hope without much pain - it seemed his heart just gave out.

The past few weeks have been the hardest of my life, but the grief is lifting slowly (helped by the fact that we still have another dog to love). The pain is horrific but I know that I could never have a home without a dog - the years of joy that they bring so outweigh the sadness.

I understand. We lost our last dog unexpectedly and horribly when she was really young. She was our baby (before kids). The devastation I felt... Cried every day for months. Swore I'd never ever ever have another, it was too hard, too awful.

Six months later we got another dog. The house felt so empty and my poor husband seemed so quietly sad.

I couldn't imagine ever "replacing" our current beloved dog but I also doubt we'll ever be dogless for any long period again. I think it might even be best we get an "overlap" dog to ensure it never happens.

I hope you have a decent amount of time left, and of reasonable health, with your lovely dear dog. Enjoy them, give them lots of kisses, tell them how they are the bestest best dog every day. Try not to think too hard about the pain to eventually come because it'll just spoil the present, and ultimately it's the price we pay for loving them.

@mylittleitalianhome I am so sorry, that sounds horrific. I hope you can remember him without pain soon, if you'd like to talk about him & share your memories then please do ❤️

Aside from the heartbreak of their short furry lives, they are a tie, and I'm not sure how ethical it is any more, having any pet.

I lost my beautiful little girl 16 months ago, aged 15, my god I have never felt pain like it, it took me 7 months before I began to accept her loss and those months were torture, it was so bad that I contemplated counselling, I think what made my grief worse was because the PTS process was not what I expected and she did feel some pain albeit only briefly but her cries haunted me (still do if I don’t quickly distract myself) I think if this hadn’t happened I would have coped a bit better. In truth I do want another dog as there is no love like it, but at the moment the stress of her illness and then death is still too much at the forefront of my mind and I’m not ready to sign up for that inevitable pain again just yet.

Sorry to hear that. We did exactly the same thing after losing our wonderful old lab girl. Rescue dog is such hard work and opened our eyes to a world of reactivity we had no idea about before. Do love her to bits but I wouldn’t do it again, I would love another dependable lab so I’d only do it again if I knew for sure we were getting a calm, chilled dog. Done our bit now for rescues.

I lost a dog when I was 15. My parents bought him when I was born and we grew up together.

The agony of losing him means I will never own another dog. Ever. And I won't put my children through it either.

I have cats now. I lost two in two years and the pain didn't even come close. The connection for me just wasn't/isn't the same with cats and dogs.

I have the most wonderful dog, she is only 8 and we all love her so much. I have 3 teenagers and they all absolutely adore her. She takes turns to sleep in their beds and it's a little bit of sibling rivalry about who gets the dog. I can often hear them try and persuade her to choose them for the night. 😊

One of the teenagers was.poorly last year and ddog was so insightful and helped calm her when she was panicking in pain. She really focused on being close to this child during this time.

This thread is so sad. I cannot even imagine her not being with us, she is such an important member of the family. The children will struggle terribly if she wasn't around. I know everyone says the same about their ddog, but ours really is super special.