Friend should pay me back?

[sneezethemoment]

There was a discounted spa deal for two people and so I paid and friend said she’d pay me back.

Then she got asked to go on holiday and said she couldn’t make it anymore, but she’d still pay and I should take someone else. I asked a different friend, we went, had a nice time.

Original friend came back from holiday and said she’s not paying me back and should get the money off the person who went.

The first friend should have paid at the time. But the second friend could reasonably be asked to pay as she has enjoyed the treat.

If she said she'd pay and ideally you have that in writing then remind her of that. The friend that went could contribute something, that'd be nice of her, but presume that friend filled the space as it was a freebie.

If she said she'd pay, she should have paid. You'll have to forget her as she's not a friend.

Not much you can do as the friend has reneged twice - once not going and second stupidly saying she'd pay for someone else to go.

I'd give it up as she's not going to pay now and is comfortable saying one thing and doing another.

Has she form for this?

So you and your friend who went think it is reasonable that someone who didnt go pays?

The friend who went should of paid

The friend you took should 100% pay. I don't understand why you are expecting the original friend to pay?
Surely she didn't mean to actually offer to pay for someone else? and if she did, why would you let her? isn't she your friend?

If she said she would still pay and you were allowed to take somebody else then that's the deal.

She needs to pay up or you go no contact.

She cannot change the rules after you were given permission to take another person on a freebie.

To me the issue is that the original friend is now going back on what the agreement was. Irrelevant what's more fair: she agreed, plans were made on the basis of that agreement, and now when it's come to the crunch she's announced she's not doing it and you need to ask the friend who came on the basis it was free for her.

I'd personally not get into a battle over the money. I'd note it and phase out the friendship. It's difficult for things to go good again after there's been sourness over money in my experience.

So just to confirm … you commit to do something with a friend and say you’ll pay them back, you decide now you can’t go but you say to your friend I’m still going to pay what I owe you and please take someone in my place. You later on then refuse to pay. Ok ..

She refuse to pay because she didnt go.
Ask the friend that did go.
Sounds like your making a big deal out of nothing.
Why would she pay for someone else honestly just bonkers let it go.

She shouldn't have agreed to in the first place, then! The second friend might have only been able to go on the outing because it was free to her. It's unfair to renege on a prior agreement that then has plans made on the basis of.

Ask the friend who went to pay

Friend 1 agreed to go, then dropped you in, but said she’d still pay for her ticket and you could take someone else.

Friend 2 agreed to go because it was free, and probably wouldn’t have gone otherwise.

You can’t say to someone “I have a free ticket do you want to come with me?” and then afterwards ask them to pay!

OP you’ve learned a lesson about not booking things for other people unless they pay in advance. Friend 1 isn’t going to pay now, and Friend 2 certainly isn’t going to pay after you offered her a free ticket!

So you think it’s ok to offer someone a free ticket then ask them to pay afterwards? Honestly the people who are saying this are absolutely mad!

Gosh. Glad I'm not friends with some of you lot.

I let this go however I would not book anything again with her..

Friend 1 should pay as she said she would. It would be difficult to ask Friend 2 to pay when you have offered them a free treat. Never book anything for Friend 1 again without payment in advance.

She should pay as that was the deal. I once paid for a holiday I couldn’t go on and the fee to change the name to a new person who went for free. If someone commits on the basis that you are paying half then you can’t lumber them with the hassle of finding a replacement payer if you bail.

Because she said she would?

tbf OP how much weight do you want to give the opinion of someone who thinks 'should of' is correct?

You are of course correct, the original friend was obliged to pay from the moment she agreed it with you, even more so once she specifically said she would pay even if you got someone else to go in her place. Legally she doesn't have a leg to stand on once she's committed to pay in writing.
She's not a friend, and is a knob.

She should have paid, but once the spa trip time had come around and she still hadn't paid it was clear she was never going to...

Guessing there was no option for a refund?

you can't do that AFTER the event, ffs.
Fair enough if OP had said BEFORE going 'do you want to pay £x for a spa?'
but you can't offer some a free spa ticket and then after they've attended say 'actually you ow me £50?'
that would make OP even cheekier than her original CF friend!

Tell original friend that second friend only came along because they were told it was a free spa because original friend has said to do this. Original friend is not a friend. MNers are so strange with their way of thinking.

Friend 1 should pay as that's what she agreed to. There's no way I'd ask friend 2 to pay

Some of the posters! Wow, what entitled cheeky fuckers! Of course the friend who made plans to go with you and let you pay and commit to it should pay. If she didn’t want to pay she could have ‘sold her space’ to someone, or lost it and no one use it, but to expect someone who wasn’t planning to go and was offered a free place to go is insane! She clearly planned that from off.

I’d insist she pay as arranged or drop her completely.