To not want dp to go on stupid stag do

[Blipitydoo]

He goes on Wednesday. He went on a “lads holiday” last year and pretty much ignored me while he was there. Also found some texts between his mates saying how many “fit women” there was there. Childish

I mean if he is away with his friend I would expect minimal contact.

And you just found some messages did you? Did he say there was ‘fit women’? Or did his friends?

You do realise there’s attractive women anywhere?

If you aren’t happy with how he converses with his friends, aren’t happy he goes away with friends, aren’t happy with the level of contact when he is away, aren’t happy that he and his friends talk about attractive women….why are you with him?

you don’t trust him do you?
not surprising

@Hectorscalling no idea actually

Oh and it came out that when he went away last year he went to a strip club but apparently only because everyone else did

You worried he will cheat? You can’t keep him locked up to stop him

Yabu

Doesn't sound like you like him very much, he's a bit spineless and you're reading his private messages. You obviously don't trust him.

How long have you been together? Do you have children?

If long term with children I’d expect a minimal amount of contact - couple of texts and a phone call per day.

If he was treating it like a single lads away type of holiday I’d have a problem with it.

That’s quite sad really, if you have no idea why you are with him then break up. You both should be with someone you’re happy with.

@McLeodIsPronouncedMcloud 12 years and 2 DC

Yikes, poor you.

Time to leave him.

If he's gonna cheat he could do it in his lunch break, probably more likely to be fair. Either trust him, or don't. Location makes no difference.

Stag dos do not sprinkle magic infidelity dust on all those who attend. Cheating men will find a way to cheat irrespective of where they are when you are out of sight.

Yabu. You can't keep him on a leash, and trying to will just drive him away.

He's entitled to go on a stag with his friends, as long as he takes over while you have a weekend break away.
Men talking about 'fit women' does not mean he's going to cheat, it's probably just lads talking each other up.

Do you have any real reason to distrust him?

You either trust him or you don’t. If you don’t it’s time to end the relationship. I can’t see the issue in a stag do to be honest. I’d not expect any contact from DH while he was away either.

There’s your answer. The stag parties, the texts, the trips away aren’t the issue.

He is the issue. And he isn’t going to change after all this time.

Ohh myyy goooddd I can't take the you don't like him very much comments. she's mad and cross with him of course it sounds like she don't like me. Other then stating the obvious have you got anything good to say????

Apart from criticising people's responses and using loads of questions marks, have you got anything good to say? I await your pearls of wisdom with bated breath.

I do like him, I love him and if I didn’t I wouldn’t be with him, but maybe I’m feeling a bit of resentment. I don’t know

I’d feel resentful too, you don’t have to be ok with any of this. It’s disrespectful.

Talking about women being fit isn't cheating

There are plenty of women on here who talk about fit men...

I know it’s not cheating but I find it disrespectful

I don't mean to sound mean but I think every man in the history of strip clubs says this to their wife/partner. I don't reckon there is a single man in a relationship who has said to his partner when he got home "yeah. I really wanted to go to the strip club so I forced Dave, Kevin and Frank to come with me. They didn't want to go bless them".

It might be "stupid" to you, OP, but clearly not to him. Why can't he go away and enjoy himself? I genuinely don't understand your objection.