Aibu to not want to move up north

[time2changeCharlieBrown]

My dh has been offered a great job opportunity a high payrise
the catch is we have to relocate up north near Leeds
so my main concerns is the weather
I hate winter, rain and snow and up there seems to get more?
also I joined a few online community groups recently to get a feel for it and learn about the areas and what’s around
all I have mainly seen is awful things about robbery’s and car theft and violent crimes! It’s really putting me off!
we have a son who is not too far off an age to go clubbing and for nights out and even though he is 6 foot 5 he’s very striking looking mixed race (Greek) and I worry about him being a target and our eldest daughter too also very striking ,but both quite naive as we currently live in a small village and don’t often go into big cities and they are at small schools.
my dh is from a different town up north not too far from Leeds still has friends there and says it’s fine and all city’s are the same and the kids will be fine as not in any gangs and unlikely to be. I am a worrier so Aibu to not want to move?

I think that's wise. I found my clogs slippy on the cobbles at first, but by the time all the horse drawn carts have been past, the manure gives a grip. I can't manage all that Hovis, though..

That’s what I’m thinking too 😵‍💫
I’m afraid that the OP has such deeply entrenched views of life outside of her southwest village bubble that anywhere north of the M4 would be considered dangerous for her DCs and her well-being 🙄
Despite being West Country born and bred I would very happily move to Yorkshire, beautiful countryside. My best holidays have been spent up there 🥰

We are not all violent racists up here bashing each other over the head like neanderthals.

I have lived in Yorkshire and down south and for me Yorkshire truly is god's own county it takes my breath away all the time.
These are the places I would look to live. Sadly we currently have to live down south ( and we have some how managed to find some big sky in the Thames Valley), but every time we visit DH (an eastender who hyperventilates if the power goes off for a couple of hours) stands at the estate agents windows drooling at what we could have in Yorkshire for the same money.
Go with an open mind looking at some of the wonderful villages and small market towns around Leeds meet the warm friendly people.

Oh come on now. You are sugar coating it

Weather regionally in UK really does differ over 100 miles or so..I went to Sheffield for the day on the train from South, and getting out of the station at Sheffield the wind was so penetrating and cold , it really was noticeable.

London can also be much colder than the South West- London gets snow when SW rarely does.

It's not the fact you don't want to move that's unreasonable, it's the reasons. Actually your reasons aren't really unreasonable - they're just inaccurate. Speaking as a Greek who moved to Nottingham 11 years ago, it's fine. Weather is fine, people are lovely, it's all very normal and pleasant. Yes there's crime, but there's crime everywhere.

Yes Nottingham isn't oop North but I think the Midlands share a lot of the same stereotypical stuff don't they in terms of weather etc

YABVU. It’s the North, not some hole somewhere. Harrogate, Knaresborough and York are absolutely gorgeous and there are lovely villages close to Leeds.

Weather regionally in UK really does differ over 100 miles or so..I went to Sheffield for the day on the train from South, and getting out, the wind was so penetrating and cold , it really was noticeable

But that was just one day. There's been plenty of days recently when people have been complaining about the 'cold, rain, wind' and it's been glorious here in Yorkshire. Saturday just gone was like that. I went to the coast and spent all day outside in the sunshine but got home to see MN threads about the awful weather.

😂

I live down south, but am from ooop north, and I’d move back there in a heart beat. The people are friendlier, nicer, more community orientated, it’s cheaper and more chilled out.

Believe it or not, we do have, shock alert, people of different backgrounds, races, and of colour.

If your DC are a bit Greek, no one will give a shiny one.

TBH the people northerners detest the most are southerners who think they are better than anyone else, and rather than giving your kids stick (which they won’t) you’ll probably find yourself having your arse handed to you on a plate by a northerner on their home turf if you bring your hoity toity attitude with you.

I wouldn’t want move there - too much of a Londoner, but I know people who live there, and they seem happy enough.

Just buy a whippet and a (waterproof) flat cap to embrace your new life

See? Even someone in London understands that it's possible to live in the North, and they have evidence.
What are you afraid of, OP?

My Sheffield friend says ''It's grim up North!'' {He loves it though}

Son's GF comes from Rotherham, and says it's significantly colder than down South.
{People are friendlier up North though}

Yabvu
have you ever been? It’s a great city with some lovely surroundings.
i’m sure you don’t need us to remind you that London has quite a lot of very dodgy bits.

the only thing that’s a genuine concern is the weather but we get snow in the city very rarely. It’s probably mostly about 2-3 degrees cooler but there’s plenty of sunshine

Completely depends on area as in how friendly and diverse it is, just like down south.

People do tend to be friendlier thou up north, in general but it completely depends.

Weather, we have had good weather this year and not too different from London / Hastings (I say this as my aunt whom I speak to daily lives in both of those places and it hasn't been too dissimilar

@time2changeCharlieBrown You've had some great advice about where to look. To make sure the move goes well I would really recommend investigating which area you want to move to thoroughly as different area have different vibes & facilities. I am sure you can find something that suits you but you’ll need to throw yourself into it.

I'm a dyed in the wool northerner. But the weather is far worse up here, I'm always surprised by how much better the weather is where my relatives and friends are down south in various places and not a small difference either. I'm sure the difference wasn't always so stark. Its the only thing that is making me contemplate a move south.

Everything else will be fine, there are lovely places to live around Leeds and I'm saying that as someone from Lancashire 😆

Oh no
what makes you say this? Everyone else seems quite positive I was starting to feel a bit better about it!

What kind of budget are you likely to have for a house? That will help you to decide where you want to live. Some of the place mentioned, e.g. Roundhay or Harrogate are more expensive, so you need to understand what you will get for your money.

Hi OP, change is always difficult and you seem to be stepping out of your comfort zone with the move. I’m another Lancastrian and I have to say that I think Yorkshire really is ‘God’s own Country’, I would live there in a heartbeat. So much beautiful countryside and villages and people are so friendly. The cliche of northerners being friendly is true. I currently live in the East Midlands and the weather on the east side of the country is soooo much better than the west. We have less rain and this summer has been gloriously sunny. Do come up with an open mind, I think you will be in for a pleasant surprise. All the best.

It never fails to amaze me the way some people in the south of England talk about the north as though it's some remote savage planet far from civilisation, with a totally different climate and incomprehensible customs. And what on earth does "he’s very striking looking mixed race (Greek) and I worry about him being a target" mean? Is that a sly little implication that we northerners are far likelier to be hateful racist bigots than people in a village in the SW?

YABVU, OP. With that kind of attitude, I think we backwards northern yokels might be happier if you stayed in the south.

York and Harrogate are lovely cities. Have you been? Leeds is not my cup of tea (I’m a country bumpkin) but I could manage York quite easily.

Yes, and the "concerns" about the "striking mixed race son"! 😂
It's a fact that everyone north of Birmingham is white, with Anglo Saxon or Viking heritage.

I feel you would like Ilkley?

If you are used to village life, I'm not sure any city or suburbs would suit, Northern or not. You really need to get out into the surrounding countryside when you come for a visit, there are lovely villages.